- Donny MacLeod: Michael, a lifetime you've spent at sea. Now, you must be picking up quite a number of tips for first-time sailors. You know, the old business of the mal de mer? I'm fairly fortunate, I don't suffer from it, but . . . any tips . . . you know - what you should eat?
- Michael Bentine: I do; I do! When I start the season I usually get a terribly queasy tummy - I eat porridge!
- Donny MacLeod: Porridge?
- Michael Bentine: Yes, porridge, because it tastes the same coming up as it does going down!
- Donny MacLeod: Now, I'd thought I'd heard most of the methods of navigation until today but Mike Peyton was telling me about the 'dog bark' - what is that?
- Michael Bentine: Well the theory is that if you actually recognize the dog then you're on the right beacon.
- Donny MacLeod: . . . You're on the way home. That's old Fido there . . . ?
- Michael Bentine: If you hear a German Shepherd you know that the tide was setting wrong!