Women's Murder Club (TV Series)

Grannies, Guns and Love Mints (2007)

Angie Harmon: Lindsay Boxer

Photos 

Quotes 

• [discussing the death of an old woman] 

  Claire Washburn : Nice vacation, good last meal, couple drinks on the plane, and you doze off during end-flight movie. Not a bad way to go.

  Cindy Thomas : I hope I go in my sleep.

  Jill Bernhardt : I want to go on top of Clive Owen. You die your way, I'll die mine.

  Lindsay Boxer : I don't want to die, period. Why are we even talking about this?

• Warren Jacobi : [after Lindsay has tackled a suspect into the pond]  You handcuffed him underwater? Very impressive, Houdini.

  Lindsay Boxer : Don't you sweet talk me. You could've tackled him.

  Warren Jacobi : I just got this suit.

• Fong : Hey, Boxer. How was your date?

  Lindsay Boxer : That's it.

  [Lindsay stands on her desk and whistles loudly] 

  Lindsay Boxer : . Listen up, I have an announcement! Since everyone seems to be so damn interested in my social life, yes, I went on a date. It was a one time thing, I am not officially on the market. And even if I was I wouldn't go out with any of you losers. Okay?

  [without turning around] 

  Lindsay Boxer : Stop staring at my ass, Fong!

• Lindsay Boxer : How long's he been in there?

  Warren Jacobi : About twenty minutes.

  Lindsay Boxer : Good, he should just be getting squirmy by now.

  Warren Jacobi : And hot! I turned the heat up in there before he got here.

  Lindsay Boxer : You are evil. This is why I love you.

• Jill Bernhardt : I think somebody doesn't want to talk about it because it went a lot better than she wants to let on.

  Cindy Thomas : Did it go a lot better?

  Lindsay Boxer : Oh, alright, you got me. It might have been the best date I've ever been on. We had an unbelievable dinner, and we talked until they closed the restaurant, and then we went home and had sex all night, and I really and truly believe that this guy is the one.

  Cindy Thomas : Oh, defensive sarcasm. It went well.

  Jill Bernhardt : Very well.

  Lindsay Boxer : It did not go well. It did not go anything. Why do you even care?

• Lindsay Boxer : Oh, right, you're getting married.

  [looks at invitation] 

  Lindsay Boxer : Soon.

  Tom Hogan : You knew that.

  Lindsay Boxer : Yeah, but this is really soon.

  [Takes invitation] 

  Tom Hogan : You know, I liked our invitations better. They were less fancy.

  Lindsay Boxer : Gee, thanks.

• Claire Washburn : Hello. To what do I owe the pleasure?

  Lindsay Boxer : I'm just checkin' in. They are not with me.

  [Claire looks at Jill and Cindy] 

  Claire Washburn : Oh, I guess this means I don't get to hear about your date?

• Claire Washburn : I didn't even know the damn thing was there until I felt it crunch under my shoe.

  Lindsay Boxer : Eww. Was it a finger?

  [Claire glares] 

  Lindsay Boxer : Well I don't know.

• Warren Jacobi : You also got a phone call from your boyfriend, Harold. Says he needs to talk to you.

  Logan Young : That's who you should be talking to if you want to know what's going on at Pacific Shores. Especially with Edna, since Harold was sleeping with her.

  Lindsay Boxer : Shut up!

  Logan Young : He was. Her, Winnie, and several others. Look, there's more bed-hopping going on at a retirement community than at a swingers club. Trust me. I've walked in on things no man should ever see.

  Warren Jacobi : Must be his "love mints".

  Lindsay Boxer : He is half-past 100 and Edna was a sweet old lady.

  Logan Young : They're old, not dead. Bet she was having more sex than you are.

  [Jacobi snickers]