- Donna: Go sleep on the couch!
- Beau Bowman: No way! I've been driving a combine all day!
- Donna: Oh, so it's my fault that you chose manual labor as a lifestyle? Fine, I shared a bed with a man for 25 years without having sex; I think I can handle one more night.
- Donna: I gotta change my pants. I don't wanna make you feel bad, but these cost as much as this house.
- Donna: Push, Porsha, you gotta help me out. You are better at birthing pigs than any pig in this barn. Push, damnit!
- Donna: When I had Rio, the nurses were completely useless. You know what I did? I reached up there, and I delivered her myself!