Brave (2012)
Billy Connolly: Fergus
Photos
Quotes
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King Fergus : Pretend I'm Merida, speak to me. What would you say?
Queen Elinor : I can't do this!
King Fergus : Sure you can!
[Elinor gives him a skeptical look]
King Fergus : There, there! THAT'S my queen! All right, here we go.
[takes a deep breath and speaks in a shrilly voice, impersonating Merida]
King Fergus : I don't want to get married! I want to stay single and let my hair flow in the wind as I ride through the glen, firing arrows into the sunset!
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Princess Merida : Mum, you'll never guess what I did today!
Queen Elinor : [not really listening] Mmm-hmm?
Princess Merida : I climbed up the Crone's Tooth and drank from the Fire Falls.
[Hamish, Hubert and Harris look at her in awe]
King Fergus : The Fire Falls, eh? They say only the ancient kings were brave enough to drink the fire.
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King Fergus : [telling a story] Then out of nowhere, biggest bear you've ever seen! Its hide littered with the weapons of fallen warriors. Its face scared with one dead eye. I drew my sword and...
Princess Merida : [cuts in] WHOOSH! One swipe, his sword shattered. Then CHOMP! Dad's leg was clean off! Down the monster's throat it went!
King Fergus : Awwwwww... That's my favorite part!
Princess Merida : Mor'du has never been seen since. And is roaming the wilds, waiting his chance at revenge.
[roars]
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Queen Elinor : Merida, a princess does not set her weapons on the table.
Princess Merida : [moans] Mum! It's just my bow!
Queen Elinor : A princess should not HAVE weapons, in my opinion.
King Fergus : Leave her be! Princess or not, learning to fight is essential.
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King Fergus : [after Young Dingwall wins the archery contest by accident] Well, that's just grand, isn't it? Guess who's coming to dinner!
Queen Elinor : [annoyed] Fergus...
King Fergus : [turns to Merida] Oh, and by the way, I hope you don't mind being called Lady Ding...
[sees dog in her seat]
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Lord MacGuffin : Do you think we should set a trap?
King Fergus : Try shutting yours!
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Princess Merida : [after Young Macintosh throws his bow] Good arm!
King Fergus : [brushes back his hair] And such lovely, flowing locks.
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Princess Merida : [after Young MacGuffin shoots and misses] I bet he wishes he was tossing cabers.
King Fergus : Or holding up bridges...
[Elinor nudges Fergus scoldingly while he and Merida snicker]
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[first lines]
Queen Elinor : Where are you? Come out! Come out! Come on out! I'm coming to get you!
[Young Merida laughs as she hides under the table]
Queen Elinor : Where are you, you little rascal? I'm coming to get you!
[Elinor looks under the table but Merida quickly moves to hide somewhere else]
Queen Elinor : Hmm. Where is my little birthday girl, hm? I'm going to gobble her up when I find her!
[Merida comes up behind Elinor and goes to run away but Elinor catches her]
Queen Elinor : Eat you!
[as Elinor and young Merida play, Fergus places his bow on the table]
Queen Elinor : Ach! Fergus, no weapons on the table!
Young Merida : Can I shoot an arrow?
[picks up the large bow from the table]
Young Merida : Can I? Can I? Can I? Can I? Please, can I?
[falls and laughs as the bow is too big for her]
King Fergus : Not with that. Why not use your very own?
[presents her with a small bow]
King Fergus : Happy birthday, my wee darlin'!
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King Fergus : Now that's what I call a wee naked baby!
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King Fergus : [to Mor'du] I'll fight you with my bare hands!