- [Sam is overwhelmed by the taste of a coconut pie]
- Sam Puckett: Why can't I marry this pie? All I want out of life is to be Mrs. Sam This Pie.
- Carly Shay: I just want to stick my whole face in this pie and go... BLOOBLOOBLOOOBLOOBLOO!
- [Spencer wipes whipped cream off her chin]
- [Spencer's on a date with a woman he's not attracted to]
- Trudy: What do you say we move this little party to the couch?
- Spencer Shay: The couch is broken.
- Trudy: Well, why don't we go break it some more?
- Freddie Benson: Hey, Stephanie! Watch this!
- [Freddie smashes a pie in his face; Baby Stephanie laughs]
- Freddie Benson: Yes! VICTORY!
- [a bear comes out of Freddie's apartment]
- Sam Puckett: [Imitating Stan Marsh from South Park] Oh my gosh, the bear ate Freddie!
- [Imitating Kyle Broflovski from South Park]
- Sam Puckett: Bad bear!
- [She hits Freddie, who falls down then gets back up]
- Freddie Benson: Never do that again.
- Sam Puckett: Don't tell me what to do.
- [She hits Freddie again and he falls to the ground]