Castle (TV Series)

Always Buy Retail (2009)

Stana Katic: Kate Beckett

Quotes 

• Kate Beckett : If she's so bad, then why'd you sleep with her this morning?

  Richard Castle : Let me tell you something about crazy people. The sex is unbelievable.

  Kate Beckett : How shallow are you?

  Richard Castle : Very.

• Kate Beckett : You dragged me in here so that you could read from your own book?

  Richard Castle : Hey, there's a lot of good stuff in here, and some of it is factual.

• [Kate and Castle are questioning a shop owner who has a large TV screen in his window and a videocam always running; it faces Oni's knock-off warehouse] 

  Oscar : What can I say? People like to see themselves on television. I mean, you would not believe the things people do in front of a camera.

  Richard Castle : [maybe a little too fascinated]  I'm listening.

  Oscar : Like this one chick, she's standing there, right in front of the store, and she starts to take off her, uh...

  Kate Beckett : [bored with the interest in exhibitionism]  Just show us the recordings from the past couple of days, okay?

  Richard Castle : Her blood sugar gets low, she gets a little cranky.

  Kate Beckett : Zip it... kitten.

• Kate Beckett : Castle! Castle!

  Richard Castle : I'm on TV.

  Kate Beckett : Are you having a breakdown?

  Richard Castle : Not a breakdown, a breakthrough. And I really am ruggedly handsome, aren't I?

  Kate Beckett : I'm waiting for the breakthrough.

• Kate Beckett : You okay, Castle?

  Richard Castle : My first gun battle.

  Kate Beckett : Your last gun battle.

  Richard Castle : Mmm. Don't be so pessimistic. I think I handled myself pretty well.

  Kate Beckett : Yeah. Probably saved my life.

  Richard Castle : Probably? I *definitely* saved you life. And you know what that means, don't you? It means you owe me.

  Kate Beckett : Owe you what?

  Richard Castle : Whatever I want. And you know exactly what I want, don't you? You know what I really... really... want you to do.

  [whispers in Kate's ear] 

  Richard Castle : Never, ever, call me kitten.

• Kate Beckett : And you call your ex-wife "a deep-fried Twinkie."

  Richard Castle : Oh, trust me. As annoying and intrusive as you think I am, she's a million times worse.

• Richard Castle : [in a shootout with Baylor]  I've written this scene about a hundred times. We give him what he wants, you know how it ends? Badly. And by "badly", I mean us dead.

  Kate Beckett : Just stay down.

  Richard Castle : You stay down.

  Kate Beckett : I can't shoot him from down here.

  Richard Castle : Yeah, he can't shoot you, either.

• Richard Castle : I had sex with my ex-wife this morning. My first ex-wife, Meredith, Alexis' mom. And, she's thinking about moving back to New York. Do you know what that would mean, to me? That would be a very special brand of hell. The hell of a deep-fried Twinkie.

  Kevin Ryan : A deep-fried Twinkie?

  Richard Castle : Yeah. The guilty pleasure that you know is bad for you, so you only do it once, maybe twice a year for the novelty. But a deep-fried Twinkie every day is...

  Kate Beckett : Castle!

• Kate Beckett : Castle!

  Richard Castle : What?

  Kate Beckett : Crime scene... Dead body... A little respect here.

  Richard Castle : I don't think he can hear me.

• Kate Beckett : This ritual, I assume that it was done for a specific purpose?

  Javier Esposito : That's only if you're assuming that the guy doing this was rational.

  Richard Castle : No, no. She's right. It might not make sense to you or me, but, uh, if you find out why he did this, we might find your killer.

  [Esposito and Ryan look at each other, nodding and grinning about the new guy telling them their jobs] 

  Javier Esposito : Yes. Kinda how we do it.

• Richard Castle : This once, when Alexis was nine, Meredith dropped by to take her out to lunch.

  Kate Beckett : So?

  Richard Castle : In Paris.

• [repeated line - throughout many episodes] 

  Kate Beckett : You know, I don't have time for this.

• Michelle : You know, from the design, I'd say this isn't Haitian, Jamaican or Dominican. This is hard-core Nigerian.

  Kate Beckett : What about this charm?

  Michelle : The charm's an offering to a Vodun saint, or loa. In this case, it's Ogun. He's usually called upon to help find something that's been lost.

  Richard Castle : So our killer's looking for something.

  Michelle : Something the victim once possessed.

  Kate Beckett : Maybe that's why he was tortured.

• [while on the phone with Meredith, Castle saw the murder suspect drive by in his car] 

  Kate Beckett : What do you mean you didn't get the plate?

  Richard Castle : Uh... there was a... it was coming...

  Javier Esposito : What kind of car was it?

  Richard Castle : Uh, it was big. It was an SUV, I think.

  Kevin Ryan : You think? What about the color?

  Richard Castle : Uh, black. Dark blue. Uh... it's very hard being a witness. I don't know how you guys ever get a conviction.

• Kate Beckett : [showing Beckett his new Kevlar vest]  And look...

  Kate Beckett : Writer?

  Richard Castle : Uh-huh. Cool, huh?

  Kate Beckett : No. Not cool. You don't need a vest.

  Richard Castle : If you shoot me, do I not bleed?

  Kate Beckett : You're not gonna get shot, and you know why? Because you are going nowhere near the gunfire. You're staying here.

  Richard Castle : Yes, we've seen how well that works.