Young Rock (TV Series)

On the Road Again (2021)

Dwayne Johnson: Dwayne Johnson

Quotes 

• Dwayne Johnson : Okay, sure, my dad stretched the truth to make himself look good, but he was also used to a certain level of success that he wasn't ready to give up.

• Dwayne Johnson : [recounting his move to Pennsylvania as a teenager]  So, money wasn't coming in the way it used to, so he and my mom opened up a cleaning business. I had a side job after school slinging pizza, but the only thing I wanted to do was chase girls. And to get their attention, I thought that I had to look rich, hence all the stealing.

  Sandy : Candidate Johnson, please, remember our media training session.

  Dwayne Johnson : It's fine, Sandy.

  Randall Park : [a little irked]  Yeah, it's fine, Sandy.

  Dwayne Johnson : So, my dad was still trying to wrestle any chance that he got, so my Uncle Afa from the Wild Samoans...

  Randall Park : The Wild Samoans.

  [he tries to growl like them] 

  Dwayne Johnson : Yeah, that's good. Borderline inappropriate.

  Randall Park : Oh.

  Dwayne Johnson : It was the tongue.

  Randall Park : Yeah. Oh, sorry.

  Dwayne Johnson : Yeah. Uh, so my Uncle Afa hooked my dad up with a promoter who got him booked on some local shows, which was great. I mean, we needed the money, but my dad was still very much reliving his glory days of the early '80s.

• Karen : [at a flea market]  Dwyane, can we go? There is a woman trying to sell me what I think is a racist syrup jar.

  Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : Um, we gotta...

  Rocky Johnson : Oh, wait, wait, no. You can't leave before the main event.

  Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : [torn between a decision]  For sure, we're staying. No way we're missing a Rocky Johnson show.

  Rocky Johnson : That's my boy.

  Hal : Rocky, showtime.

  Rocky Johnson : Great, thanks, Hal.

  [to Dwayne] 

  Rocky Johnson : I'll see you after the match?

  Karen : No way we're staying. There is a man selling a pile of old baby shoes, and it is freaking me out.

  Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : If you want to leave, go ahead, but I'm staying.

  Karen : Why?

  Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : He's my dad.

  Randall Park : Like Karen, I'm also confused. Why did you stay?

  Dwayne Johnson : He's my dad. That's it.

• Randall Park : I'm Randall Park at Freedom High School, continuing our all-access coverage of the Dwayne Johnson presidential campaign.

  Superintendent Broward : Thank you for joining us for the official opening of the Dwayne Johnson Library. Dwayne, we always knew that you were destined for greatness.

  Dwayne Johnson : [in a sit-down interview]  Nice lady. She made me sound good, but none of it was true. I mean, the only thing that people said I was destined to do was time.

  Randall Park : [chuckling together]  That's good.

  Dwayne Johnson : As we all know, nobody's perfect, and we all screw up. I just happened to screw up a little bit more than most. As a matter of fact, Randall, when I first got here to Freedom High School, I was a hardcore shoplifter.

  Randall Park : Mm-hmm.

  [to the cameramen] 

  Randall Park : Hey, just so you know, you guys have to come in tighter when he says stuff like that.

  [the camera starts to move] 

  Randall Park : Well, it's too late now. It's too late. Back up. Just anticipate.

• Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : Hello, ladies.

  Karen : Hi, Tomas.

  Dwayne Johnson : [narrating]  Oh, yeah, I also told her that my name was Tomas.

  Karen : Missed you in homeroom.

  Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : Oh, I was shaving. I lost track of time.

  Big-Hair Karen : So, why are you even working here? I thought Karen said you were rich.

  Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : Oh, this isn't a money job. This is a build-character job.

  Colorblind Karen : I totally get it. My cousin's a construction worker.

  Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : My dad's a professional wrestler. That's where our family money comes from.

  Karen : Oh, yeah? My dad ordered WrestleMania III on pay-per-view. Was your dad in that?

  Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : No, but he's friends with all the guys who were. I once spent a beautiful day with Andre the Giant when I was a kid.

  Bonnie : Fezzik! That's his character's name in "The Princess Bride".

  Karen : Well, that's interesting. Not what Bonnie said, but what you said.

• Dwayne Johnson : [visiting his old high school]  So, we moved here to Bethlehem from Nashville because my dad wasn't wrestling for Vince McMahon anymore.

  Randall Park : That's your father...

  Dwayne Johnson : Mm-hmm.

  Randall Park : [imitating a ring announcer]  ..."Soul Man" Rocky Johnson!

  Dwayne Johnson : Nice, man. Good job. Give me some.

  Randall Park : [fist-bumping]  All right.

  Dwayne Johnson : You practiced that, didn't you?

  Randall Park : I did. I don't know if I mentioned it, but I used to be an actor.

  Dwayne Johnson : You have.

  Randall Park : I have?

  Dwayne Johnson : Yeah, yeah.

  Randall Park : Okay.

  Dwayne Johnson : Multiple times.

• Karen : Wow, this place really is sold out.

  Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : I'll talk to the guy, tell him who we are.

  Parking Attendant : Here for the flea market?

  Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : We're here for the wrestling match.

  Parking Attendant : Yep, you're in the right place. That's right between the vintage coats and French armoires.

  Dwayne Johnson : [narrating]  Now, I knew my dad wasn't wrestling in packed arenas anymore, but he definitely stretched the truth about this venue.

• Rocky Johnson : How's it going with that girl you like?

  Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : Fine-ass Karen. And not good. I want to ask her out, but so does every other guy in school.

  Rocky Johnson : Well, son, you are not every other guy. You just need to figure out what you can offer her that no one else can.

  Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : My Hans and Franz impression from "Saturday Night Live".

  Rocky Johnson : I don't know what that means, son, but you gotta step your game up. Be confident. Girls like swagger. And don't wait to make your move. For every second you hesitate, there's another guy out there telling your girl she'd look better with less makeup.

  Dwayne Johnson : [narrating]  So I wasn't gonna hesitate.

  Ata Johnson : [leaving for work]  Dewey, I'm leaving. See you tonight!

  Dwayne Johnson (Age 15) : Okay, Ma, see you later!

  Dwayne Johnson : This girl Karen thought I was rich, and I sure as hell wasn't, so I had to impress her with the best stolen clothes I had.