Lancelot Link: Secret Chimp (TV Series)
There's No Business Like Snow Business (1970)
Bernie Kopell: Baron von Butcher, Creto, Wang Fu
Quotes
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Baron von Butcher : This is the first step in my brilliant plan to steal and dispose of the Star of Karachi Diamond.
Ali Assa Seen : I await your word, my leader. Yeah, yeah, y-yeah, yeah.
Baron von Butcher : Tonight, you will steal the Star of Karachi Diamond. Then you will deliver it to the Duchess at Big Mountain Ski Resort.
Ali Assa Seen : I understand.
Baron von Butcher : I will get the diamond there and deliver it to the Dragon Woman on her nuclear power junk.
Ali Assa Seen : Excellent!
Baron von Butcher : Uh-huh. Danke Schoen.
Ali Assa Seen : You and certainly welcome. Yeah.
Baron von Butcher : Now, listen.
[the Baron coughs]
Baron von Butcher : The Dragon Woman will then smuggle it into Hong Kong and sell it to a wealthy diamond merchant I have contacted.
Ali Assa Seen : An ingenious plan.
Baron von Butcher : I have covered every detail.
Ali Assa Seen : How do I steal the diamond?
Baron von Butcher : That's your problem.
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Wang Fu : Dragon Woman?
Dragon Woman : Yes, Wang Fu?
Wang Fu : What did Baron say in message?
Dragon Woman : When Star of Karachi Diamond stolen, we sell it for $3 million.
Wang Fu : Then divide money. How much for each of us?
Dragon Woman : I figure out on abacus.
[Short pause]
Dragon Woman : Each member of C.H.U.M.P. will get $500,000.
Wang Fu : What you do with your share of money?
Dragon Woman : First thing, I will get rid of this abacus and buy adding machine.
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Baron von Butcher : Did Ali Assa Seen get here yet?
The Duchess : Not yet.
Baron von Butcher : Have you seen any sight of A.P.E. agents around here?
The Duchess : No, not a one.
Baron von Butcher : Very good. That'll make everything easy.
The Duchess : My maid mentioned there's a marvelous expert ski instructor here. I think I'll take some skiing lessons.
[the Duchess walks away]
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Baron von Butcher : And so, soon we will have the most valuable jewel in the world.
The Duchess : Oh, the famous Star of Karachi Diamond.
Creto : Si, and it costs $3 million, too.
Baron von Butcher : Nonsense. It costs C.H.U.M.P. nothing. We are going to steal it.
[Creto and the Duchess chuckle]
Baron von Butcher : [as Creto holds a pair of scissors above his head] Take some off the top. I don't like long hair.