Who Wants to Be a Millionaire (TV Series)

Comedy Edition, Show 5: Robin Quivers, Kevin Nealon (2001)

Regis Philbin: Self - Host

Quotes 

• Regis Philbin : [Kevin Nealon was the only contestant remaining and he didn't get the Fastest Finger Question correct]  Well, you just saw what happened. Welcome back everybody. Now I've got to read this so you all understand: Kevin, Kevin. You put "B" in the computer twice. You can't hit delete after you've hit "Okay". So, what do we do to get you in that chair?

  Kevin Nealon : Well, first of all, Regis...

  [audience chuckles] 

  Kevin Nealon : I hit "B" twice because "Roxanne" was the first movie I was in, and it was a very good movie. So I hit it twice to emphasize that. Now, as far as that chair is concerned... I'm not really that crazy about goin' to that chair.

  [Regis chuckles] 

  Kevin Nealon : But I will go there, because there's no one else to.

  Regis Philbin : You know what would be funny? If you went all the way. And it could happen.

  Kevin Nealon : It will happen.

  Regis Philbin : Okay. You're pretty sure about that...

  Kevin Nealon : Not TODAY, but maybe another time.

  Regis Philbin : All right, take two. Here is, comes, your next Fastest Finger Question. Right now. "Put these favorite Kevin Nealon characters in alphabetical order! Mr. No Depth Perception, Franz, Tarzan, Weekend Update Anchor."

  [seconds pass] 

  Regis Philbin : Time's up. If he gets this wrong, I quit, right now, right in front of you.

• Regis Philbin : What charity are you playing for?

  Kevin Nealon : What do you mean?

  [audience and Regis laugh] 

  Kevin Nealon : What do you mean, what "charity"?

  Regis Philbin : Everybody's here playing for a charity!

  Kevin Nealon : [pause]  Interesting. I, um, I wasn't aware of that. I thought they were just very generous.