- Neil Bremer: You know, I'm not the one who said that she should never have a minimum wage job. I'm, I'm not the one who insisted that she go to private school.
- [Jayden looks up, raises his eyebrows as he realizes he's alone with Neil]
- Neil Bremer: It was Natalie. Before she died, she laid it all out.
- [sighs]
- Jayden Kwapis: Dead wives. Can't live with them... Obviously.
- Neil Bremer: My daughter has decided that she has been coddled, and now she wants to do real work. Just give her some basic office stuff to do, please.
- Tommy Tomás: Does she know Excel? Because I have some polling data...
- Neil Bremer: No. Nothing complicated. Just point her toward a task any idiot could do and then say "Good job."
- Tommy Tomás: Got it. I'll put on my kid gloves, and handle your daughter... Wow, hearing it, sir.
- [exits]
- Neil Bremer: [indignantly] Tommy, I need you to supervise Orly.
- Tommy Tomás: [superciliously] Yes! You lose, Jayden.
- Jayden Kwapis: [affably confused] Oh, okay, well, can we play again later?
- Jayden Kwapis: [giving a tour to members of the youth leadership program] We call this room The Bullpen, which is short for bull penis.
- Arpi Meskimen: When Maya's school went virtual during the pandemic, her nearest Wi-Fi was in an alley, outside a strip club.
- Maya Gilmore: To this day, I can't do calculus unless I'm listening to "Pony" by Ginuwine.
- Herb Watcher: Oh, that's terrible. As you know, my mother was a dancer at Deja Boob.
- Arpi Meskimen: Hmm, I'd forgotten that, Herb.
- Herb Watcher: A gentleman's club is not a good place to learn, especially when your English teacher shows up and throws dollars at your mom.
- Arpi Meskimen: So you're gonna help us move ordinance 462 forward?
- Herb Watcher: Well, I promised no new spending this fiscal year. But for once, let's throw some wadded-up cash at a good cause.
- Orly Bremer: [indignant] Unbelievable! My whole life, you've been bribing people into letting me think I'm special, like you're Aaron Spelling and I'm Tori!
- Neil Bremer: I know you're studying the Spellings in AP Beverly Hills History, but I'm...
- Arpi Meskimen: To government!
- Ben Williams, Maya Gilmore, Inez Herrera: Woo!
- Arpi Meskimen: Today, we took our system one step closer to its perfect form: An agricultural matriarchy!
- Orly Bremer: Look, I got this internship on my own, and I don't want any special treatment.
- Neil Bremer: Okay.
- [chuckles]
- Orly Bremer: We're gonna be late to work, Mr. Mayor.
- [Orly and Neil laugh]
- Dan: You didn't tell her that you got her into that program?
- Neil Bremer: And you didn't tell me that my security codename is one of "The Golden Girls."
- Dan: I apologize, sir.
- Neil Bremer: [sarcastically] Yeah.
- Dan: [into his jacket lapel] Dorothy Zbornak has left the condo.
- Orly Bremer: Mom wouldn't have helped me cheat my way into the Youth Leadership Program.
- Neil Bremer: Orly, if you don't think that you got this job on your own, you're free to quit.
- Orly Bremer: No, quitting is what a privileged brat would do. Those other kids, they worked real hard to be here, and now it's my turn.
- Neil Bremer: You don't want to start by maybe unloading the dishwasher at home?
- Orly Bremer: And deprive Cecilia the dignity of a hard day's work?
- Jayden Kwapis: Now that I have everyone's attention, I would like to introduce the 2022 Mayor's Youth Leadership Program participants. And in the interest of inclusion, partici-skirts.
- [reading from a biography]
- Jayden Kwapis: Inez Herrera was a finalist in the intel space competition. She speaks Spanish and Mandarin. Oh, gosh, it doesn't say English here.
- [loudly with animated gestures]
- Jayden Kwapis: So wel-come I-nez.
- Arpi Meskimen: So we can count on your support to bring ordinance 462 to a vote for L.A.'s future.
- Frank Higbee: Count me in.
- Arpi Meskimen: Kids, let's be sure we record this historic moment.
- Inez Herrera: Already live streaming it.
- Arpi Meskimen: Feel that, Frank? That's all 92 pounds of me stepping right on your huevos.
- Jayden Kwapis: [enters Mikaela's office] Hey, so you know how the mayor was supposed to apologize to the Boyle Heights food vendors today?
- Mikaela Shaw: Uh...
- Jayden Kwapis: Well, our Spanish interpreter was out sick, so I took a crack at it.
- Mikaela Shaw: Oh, God. What did you make him say?
- [cut to press conference]
- Mikaela Shaw: Mayor Bremer is not hiding a secret love child. He was told that "embarazada" means "embarrassed," when, of course, it means pregnant.