The Simpsons (TV Series)

How Munched Is That Birdie in the Window? (2010)

Dan Castellaneta: Homer Simpson, Grampa, Itchy

Quotes 

• Homer Simpson : Me, the patriarch of a pigeon-racing dynasty.

  [Thought bubble shows Homer with trophy; Danica Patrick appears] 

  Danica Patrick : Congratulations, Homer.

  Homer Simpson : Danica Patrick in my thoughts?

  Danica Patrick : That's right, Homer. I'm contractually obligated by my sponsors to appear in random fan's fantasies. Better not tell Marge about it.

  Marge Simpson : You brickyard bimbo!

  [They fight; the thought bubble fades] 

  Homer Simpson : I ended that a little too soon.

  [Thought bubble reappears with Danica and Marge beating up Homer] 

  Homer Simpson : What they don't suspect is that I'm into this.

• Marge Simpson : A doctor who treats kids and pets?

  Dr. Thurmond : Hey, in this economy I'll even remove tattoos.

  Homer Simpson : Can you remove my tramp stamp? I got the idea from watching a show where people regret these.

• Homer Simpson : Listen to the man, Marge. He pays Bart's salary.

  Marge Simpson : No, he doesn't.

  Homer Simpson : Why don't you ever support my gibberish? I'd do it if you were stupid.

• Homer Simpson : [chasing Santa's Little Helper around the backyard]  Stupid dog! Let go of that delicious bird!

• Moe Szyslak : Have you ever thought of racing that bird?

  Homer Simpson : You can bet on pigeons?

  Moe Szyslak : Hey, if it moves you can bet on it.

  Bart Simpson : What about the Detroit Lions?

  Moe Szyslak : Hey, lay off Detroit. Them people is going through Mad Max times.

• Bart Simpson : I don't know. This coop looks a little flimsy.

  Homer Simpson : Flimsy, eh? This gentle pat says different.

  [Homer pats coop; the staples pop off and the frame collapses; the chicken wire rolls up back into the box and the staples fall in place to close it] 

  Homer Simpson : D'oh!