- Mary Conner: Why would it be awkward for you to run into Nick?
- Darlene Conner: I'm gonna tell you. So you don't make the same dating mistakes I did. Ben was a schmuck. And he baited me into a fight that drove Nick away.
- Mary Conner: Dad said Nick broke up with you because you're a black widow spider who sucks the souls out of men and leaves their dreams tangled in your web.
- D.J. Conner: Prove me wrong.
- Jackie Harris: Well I'm not doing it anymore. It's full of people that think natural deodorant works, but it doesn't. Their patchouli disorients you so the B.O. can attach itself to your clothes and follow you home.
- Jackie Harris: Oh, yeah. It's on there.