Nostalgia Critic (TV Series)

Power Rangers: A Look Back (2007)

Doug Walker: Nostalgia Critic

Quotes 

• Nostalgia Critic : Yeah, how's that supposed to put you in a trance, taking two sticks and putting them up and down, up and down, up and down,

  [cut to Dulcia in her Battle Bikini] 

  Nostalgia Critic : up and down... up and down...

  [picture slowly zooms in on her breasts] 

  Nostalgia Critic : ... up and down... up and down...

  [gets his hat knocked off] 

  Nostalgia Critic : [Beat]  You win this round, Dulcea.

• Nostalgia Critic : This movie makes no sense, nothing about the Power Rangers does! How come the monsters always land in the exact same city? How come the city turns into a canyon whenever the fight scene's about to happen? How come nobody recognizes the Rangers even though they wear the exact same colors every day? How come they always move like they have Tourette Syndrome? How come Rita's voice never sounds right? How come they dress up like Nascar mannequins? How come it's sunny in space? How come Alpha's so gay? How come Kimberly's so hot? And why is that theme song so damn catchy?

• Nostalgia Critic : Yes, I think we can agree that Zordon has been like a father figure to us all... where are these kids' parents?

• Nostalgia Critic : The battle eventually works itself into outer space where the mother of all finishing blows is thrown.

  [one Zord kicks another in its crotch area] 

  Nostalgia Critic : Dude, did you just see that? Eek! Real good lesson for the kids, guys. If you can't overcome your enemies, just kick them in the happy-sack and they'll go down like anyone else. Top notch.

• Tommy : Remember what we learned? To those who possess the great power, all things are possible.

  Nostalgia Critic : No, Tommy, no. That's... that's crazy talk!

• Nostalgia Critic : When this first came on, I remember thinking to myself there is no way this will ever catch on. People can't possibly be this stupid. And this is why I'm not in the stock market.

• Tommy : We may not have our powers, but we're still the Power Rangers.

  Nostalgia Critic : Hmm... I'm gonna disagree with you, Tommy. You see, being a Power Ranger implies that you have actual powers, so without power, you're just a plain old ranger, and trust me, they're not all that powerful. Especially when trying to protect some pic-a-nic baskets.

• Nostalgia Critic : [about the movie]  Does it suck balls? Oh, yeah. Major balls.

• Nostalgia Critic : Hey, hey, bitch, get back here! Where's my real superpower? Hey! HEEEEYYYYYY! HEEEEYYYYY! Fuck this, man, I'm gonna go into anime.