- Nostalgia Critic: So literally the books disappeared because nobody was reading them? Come on, this isn't nearly as subtle as the first movie. That's like saying my Nintendo will disappear if I stopped playing with it.
- [Nintendo Entertainment System starts to disappear]
- Nostalgia Critic: No. No! No! NINTENDO!
- Nintendo: [in Mario voice] Sorry, Critic, you stopped a-playing with me.
- Nostalgia Critic: Why? Why?
- Nintendo: Enjoy your Play Station 3, cock maggot.
- [the Nostalgia Critic cries]
- Bastian: The Empress is being held prisoner, and before we can fight the force that's keeping her, I must give it a name.
- Nostalgia Critic: Well, why don't you name it after your mother like in the first film. What was it again?
- Bastian: [clip from first movie. Bastian screaming, almost inaudible] Moonchild!
- Nostalgia Critic: Yeah, call it that.
- Bastian: You saved my life, Atreyu.
- Atreyu: Yes. But you would have done the same for me.
- Nostalgia Critic: [When Bastian doesn't respond] Right? RIGHT?
- Bastian: [after long pause] Sure.
- Nostalgia Critic: Oh my God, this kid is a dick. Is that really what you want to say to your rescuer? If someone saved you from a burning fire, would you be like... "Thank you so much... Just as a heads-up, if you were in this same situation, burning alive in a tall building, I would probably get pizza. Nothing personal, I just can't stand your guts."
- Bastian: I wish for... a spray can!
- Nostalgia Critic: [stammers] A FUCKING SPRAY CAN? That's the best you can come up with? Where is the imagination in this kid? I thought he was, like, the last great dreamer or something and all he can think of is a fucking spray can? The fantasies in Sidekicks were more impressive than this! In fact, he should just wish for Chuck Norris.
- [the famous "A-Chuck A-Noriiiiiiiissssss plays]
- Nostalgia Critic: Yeah, they could turn everybody into Ninjas, having a rocking battle, everything would be awesome. It'd be the coolest adventure ever. But no, we get spray cans. Honest to God, spray cans. I have no remorse for this little idiot if something bad happens to him.
- Ma-Ti: [runs in] Heart!
- Nostalgia Critic: Er, no, no. It's cool.
- Ma-Ti: What?
- Nostalgia Critic: They got it taken care of.
- Ma-Ti: Aw man, the one time I can use this fucking thing and it doesn't do shit!
- Elephant in the Room: Ahem!
- Nostalgia Critic: Yes?
- Elephant in the Room: Don't act like you don't see me.
- Nostalgia Critic: What? What're talkin' about?
- Elephant in the Room: You've been ignoring me since the beginning. Don't act like you don't know why I'm here.
- Nostalgia Critic: No. I don't. What? Is it the Jonathan Brandis kid? I mean, what about him?
- Elephant in the Room: You know he committed suicide.
- Koreander: Have you ever read a book twice? Books change each time you read them.
- Nostalgia Critic: For example, if you read The Velvetine Rabbit again, it's really about Nazis.
- Bastian: Everything looks fine in Fantasia.
- Nostalgia Critic: Fine? Fine? Maybe for Burning Man, but this looks pretty fucked up to me!
- Nostalgia Critic: But luckily, Atreyu shows up to help Bastian on his quest, and give them some credit, they actually did pick a Native American kid this time.
- [during a scene where Bastian is in swim class and has to dive off the high board]
- Nostalgia Critic: [nervously] Oh, nobody said there'd be diving in diving class.