- Shawn Spencer: We should avoid Peters and Boone until we have something juicy.
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: Then throw our something juicy at their faces.
- Shawn Spencer: Yeah, like rotten peaches.
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: What, where are we gonna get peaches?
- Shawn Spencer: Mmm, but I really like that idea.
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: Me too, but I think we should get fresh peaches and eat them instead.
- Shawn Spencer: Right in front of them.
- Shawn Spencer: Chief, I can tell you definitively, Herb did not die on this boat. Nope. Not on this boat. Nowhere near this boat. He was killed at another location. TBS.
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: It's "TBD," Shawn.
- Shawn Spencer: What's TBS?
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: The Superstation.
- Shawn Spencer: Is it really, though?
- Shawn Spencer: Dude, that guy looks like a Billy Zane action figure.
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: Yeah, he does.
- Shawn Spencer: I wonder how much he costs.
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: He's a grown-ass man, Shawn. I doubt he's for sale.
- Shawn Spencer: Shouldn't we at least ask?
- Boone: Oh, go ahead be proud, you can crack locks and steal things, typical
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: For your information, I used to have an online subscription to Safe Cracking Magazine.
- Boone: Hey, Hey, Hey, You're disappointing me son.
- Shawn Spencer: Take Gus, he can pass for Omar Epps in restaurants!
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: Take Shawn, trust me, you'll feel better about yourself in comparison!
- Shawn Spencer: Hello, ma'am, my name's Shawn Spencer. This is my partner, Imhotep or "He cometh in peace."
- Shawn Spencer: [to Gus] Go ahead, show her your "He cometh in peace" face.
- Shawn Spencer: No, Gus and I never know when to throw in the towel.
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: We're ready for the next round
- Shawn Spencer: Ring the bell
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: Ding, ding
- Boone: Well, the palm reader and that guy who looks like a young LaWanda Page decided to join us.
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: Lawanda Page? From Sanford And Son?
- Boone: You're damn right! You let that hair grow out and you'll look just like her.
- Shawn Spencer: You do have a little LaWanda in the eyes, Gus.
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: Shut up, Shawn!
- Shawn Spencer: Why do they shake hands like that?
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: [both laugh] I do not know. What?
- Shawn Spencer: That's so ridiculous.
- [They fist bump and miss, then look at each other sheepishly]
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: How is it these guys beat us everywhere we go, but always drive as if we're in a school zone?
- Shawn Spencer: It's like we're following Richard Farnsworth in The Straight Story.
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: Except lawnmowers don't have turn signals.