How I Met Your Mother (TV Series)
Ducky Tie (2011)
Neil Patrick Harris: Barney Stinson
Photos
Quotes
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Ted Mosby : Oh, guess who I ran into
[at the Architect's Ball]
Ted Mosby : . A girl from my past. Any guesses?
Lily Aldrin : Stella.
Barney Stinson : Zoey.
Marshall Eriksen : Karen?
Lily Aldrin : The girl who beat you up.
Barney Stinson : The girl who ruined a photo with Slash!
Marshall Eriksen : The girl who made you get the butterfly tattoo?
Ted Mosby : You make it sound like I dated a series of Stieg Larsson novels.
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Barney Stinson : [about Lily's boobs] What are you waiting for, Lil? Bust 'em out, make 'em dance!
Lily Aldrin : No!
Barney Stinson : [singing] Let your boobies show!
Marshall Eriksen : Okay, I'm sorry, pal, but the party of my wife's sweater is a private event, and I'm the bouncer, so...
Robin Scherbatsky : Dude, I think they are the bouncers.
Marshall Eriksen : Okay, can we stop talking about my wife's breasts? It's... Ted ran into Victoria!
Ted Mosby : I know, I'm-I'm still a little shaken about it, I mean, there she was after all these years, the emotions, and memories, and... Jeez, Lily, it's like you have a butt on your chest.
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Lily Aldrin : Terms, if you can do all that stuff that Marshall just listed off I will let you touch one boob.
Barney Stinson : Both boobs!
Lily Aldrin : Just one.
Barney Stinson : Touch and squeeze.
Lily Aldrin : Just touch.
Barney Stinson : Touch and motor boat.
Lily Aldrin : Just touch.
Barney Stinson : Honka honka?
Lily Aldrin : [Annoyed] Barney...
Barney Stinson : Just touch.
Lily Aldrin : Just touch.
Barney Stinson : For one hour.
Lily Aldrin : For one second!
Barney Stinson : Twenty minutes both boobs.
Lily Aldrin : Thirty seconds one boob.
Barney Stinson : Four minutes, both boobs, three squeezes.
Lily Aldrin : One minute, both boobs, one squeeze.
Barney Stinson : Deal!
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Barney Stinson : [Eating with chopsticks] Has anyone gotten a bite yet?
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Ted Mosby : [Helping Victoria wash dishes] Well, this is great. You know what else is getting clean along with this cupcake tray? My conscience.
Victoria : You got anything else you need to atone for? My oven needs cleaning
Ted Mosby : No, nothing else.
[Looking at Victoria]
Ted Mosby : Not yet anyway.
Robin Scherbatsky , Lily Aldrin , Marshall Eriksen , Barney Stinson : [At the restaurant, singing] Bang, bang, bangity bang, I said a bang-bang-bangity...
Victoria : [Cut back] I'm getting married
Robin Scherbatsky : ...bang
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Lily Aldrin : [Barney is trying to get Lily to show her boobs] Why on *Earth* would I want to see that?
Barney Stinson : They're round and attached to my body; it's an even trade.