Hawaii Five-0 (TV Series)

Lekio (Radio) (2012)

James Caan: Tony Archer

Photos 

Quotes 

• Tony Archer : Listen. Whoa. Just listen.

  [He and McGarrett are in a stand off on Tony's boat] 

  Tony Archer : I see no reason for one of us to get shot. We don't have to do this. What we should do is maybe, uh, put our little pea shooters down at the same time.

  Steve McGarrett : Oh yeah? How's that done, huh?

  Tony Archer : Uh. We'll count. One, two, three.

  Steve McGarrett : Count of three, put our guns down. Huh?

  Tony Archer : You got it.

  Steve McGarrett : You want me to start?

  Tony Archer : That would be nice.

  Steve McGarrett : Alright. One.

  [pause] 

  Tony Archer : You're doin' good. Keep goin'.

  Steve McGarrett : Two. Three.

  [They lower their guns. Steve holsters his, but Tony points his at Steve] 

  Tony Archer : Learned a big lesson, didn't ya, pal?

  Danny 'Danno' Williams : [Cocks his gun and puts it against Tony's neck from behind]  Think you learned a big lesson too, ol' man. Huh?

• Tony Archer : Leland's a coward. When HPD rolled up, the protesters he was with, they all linked arms and sat down. But, not this guy. He just ran.

  Danny 'Danno' Williams : Yeah, he ran because he had something to hide. Makes sense.

  Tony Archer : Well, you see a suspect.

  [shrugs] 

  Tony Archer : I see a coward.

  Danny 'Danno' Williams : This afternoon you couldn't see anything without your glasses.

• Steve McGarrett : [Tony has just brought out pizza flown in from New York]  That's a... that's a good piece of pizza right there.

  Tony Archer : No, no, no, no. See, where we come from we don't say piece. It's a slice. We call it a slice.

  Danny 'Danno' Williams : [waving his hand]  No, don't say that.

  [pointing to Steve] 

  Danny 'Danno' Williams : Not domesticated. He's an animal.

  [Tony chuckles] 

  Steve McGarrett : What do you mean, animal?

  Danny 'Danno' Williams : You were born an animal.

  Steve McGarrett : I'm eating pizza here. You're callin' me an animal.

  Danny 'Danno' Williams : You'll be an animal the rest of your life.

  Tony Archer : Hold it. Hold it. Hold it. Hold it!

  Steve McGarrett : Huh?

  Tony Archer : Lemme ask ya something. Do you two hens peck at each other like this all the time? All the time.

  Steve McGarrett : Nahh...

  Danny 'Danno' Williams : Yeah. Absolutely.

  Steve McGarrett : No. No. Well...

• Kono Kalakaua : [Tony has been looking under the computer platform while Kono updates the team]  Something wrong?

  Tony Archer : [disbelieving]  This is a computer.

  Danny 'Danno' Williams : [sarcastic]  Wow. That's pretty good, Detective.

  Kono Kalakaua : I'm Kono, by the way.

  Tony Archer : Anthony.

  [They shake hands] 

  Kono Kalakaua : Pleasure to meet you.

  Tony Archer : Pleasure.

  [He gives her a charming smile] 

  Tony Archer : I hope to enhance that feeling as time goes on.

• Tony Archer : When Tony Archer promises you something, you can bet you're gonna get it... 50% of the time.

• Danny 'Danno' Williams : Tony, do me a favour.

  Tony Archer : Do you what favour?

  Danny 'Danno' Williams : If you ever touch my hair again, I'm gonna shoot you, OK?

  Tony Archer : Oh, did I touch it again?

  Danny 'Danno' Williams : You touched it a little bit.

  Tony Archer : You have a funny thing with your hair, don't you?

  Danny 'Danno' Williams : Little bit.

  Tony Archer : Well, I ain't got a lot of it.

  [Points to his hair] 

  Tony Archer : You know what this is called? Ought to have been hair.

  Danny 'Danno' Williams : Ought to have been on...

  Tony Archer : Ought to have been on a donkey's ass.

  [laughs] 

  Steve McGarrett : I didn't want to say anything but, you know.

  Tony Archer : Well, I'm glad you didn't.

  Steve McGarrett : [Points to his hair]  What do you call this?

  Tony Archer : I call that shit.

  Steve McGarrett : We don't need to talk about it.

• Tony Archer : [to the suspect]  He gave you his daughter.

  [angry] 

  Tony Archer : He gave you his daughter!

  [punches suspect in the face]