House of Cards (2013) Poster

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1/10
Chintzy, just chintzy.
owner-777-53243128 August 2013
Wow, haven't seen a movie this bad in a long time. From the opening scene, I was like wait a minute, what the heck is this. As the movie went on I kept saying wow, this is awful. The fighting scenes were bad, the acting was just about the same. It almost felt like i was watching an old karate movie where the audio was not synced. As for the weird votes that were a 10, surely we know who that was. All it takes is the opening scene, and you will know that your in for a real treat, and not a good one.Save your money and rent something else, or catch up on your sleep. I can sum this movie up in one word, rather fitting if i do say so. Chintzy!
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2/10
Wooden acting, Awkward fighting. Incoherent storyline. Well...
paul_haakonsen2 September 2013
Sometimes you read something and think 'surely that can't be the truth' and then there are times when you should just heed that advice and stay clear of certain things. As is the case with "House of Cards". Wow, this was bad. So what went wrong with the movie? Well, a multitude of things went wrong.

First of all, the story! A totally pointless and irrelevant story about a group of assassins and a lush reporter investigating a symbol that he saw marked on a tree during a drunken stupor. There was absolutely no coherency or a red thread throughout this movie. And the characters in the movie were lacking personality, charisma, enthusiasm and were essentially one-dimensional puppets put on display.

Then there was the acting. Well, rather, the attempts at acting. The acting in the movie was really rigid and wooden, it was like watching marionettes trying to be human.

Which then leads on to the fight scenes. They were without a doubt among the worst fighting scenes I have had the misfortune (or fortune, depending on how you look at it) to witness displayed in a movie on the screen. Especially the fight scene in the training center, it was just downright embarrassing to watch.

Funny how this movie is labeled 'action'. But I guess that definition is as fluid as water. You have to look long and hard to find an action movie as bad as "House of Cards".

But at least thumbs up to director Ian Chinsee for giving this an effort and trying. And I am rating this movie a 2 out of 10 rating because it did have some good enough production value - which was essentially all that worked in favor of the movie.
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1/10
Don't waste your time on this one
PollyPick29 August 2013
Everything about this movie screams "film student project". The script is terribly weak: dialogue is unconvincing, and the story meanders so much so that by the end of it I had no idea what was happening.

There is no consistency with back stories, and no convincing motivations for people's actions. Why are super secret assassins posing for selfies on the riverside with ninja swords in their hands and sending them to one another? The reason one assassin gives her assassin ex-boyfriend's number to a reporter (John) who is following up on rivalry killings? "I thought you could use someone outside of the gang to talk to."

Yes. The best candidate she could think of was a reporter. For him to talk to about their (illegal) assassin problems. Brilliant.

But wait, it doesn't end there. When assassin dude doesn't seem overly interested (not that he seems super interested about anything at all in this movie), she really makes her case with:

ASSASSIN CHICK: He (John) was suspended from the paper because he almost put someone in a coma.

ASSASSIN DUDE: The plot thickens.

Quality writing.

The fighting scenes are achingly staged, the story makes no sense, and no-one appears to be able to act. Although to be fair, acting convincingly must have been a challenge given the crap material they were given.

Looking forward to a review of this one from YourMovieSucksDOTorg.
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3/10
Missed opportunity
martin-in-space4 September 2013
Hi

As soon as I saw the first few action sequences I lost interest in this flick - I could not understand how given the financing that must of gone into this, that basic stuff like getting the right camera angle for a fight sequence could not be achieved? I mean, if your actors/stunt people are half good (at fight sequencing)then fair enough they might be able to (strike, block. kick) close enough to each other to make the action appear realistic, or you might film with the actors making 'soft' contact in slow motion (and then speed things up) or just get the right angle (behind the person throwing or receiving the punch, for example) - but having poorly choreographed action filmed at 90 degrees to the camera with obvious space between the combatants strikes just makes no sense. There was a certain (good) quality of production to some of the non action sequences that belied what I just described so I remain confused about this one - ultimately though, disappointing.
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2/10
Throw this deck away
rnixon197427 August 2013
Warning: Spoilers
I have rarely seen such a poor excuse for an action film. Admittedly, this is a poor excuse for a film, full stop, but it is egregious to me that this is a vendetta/fight flick.

It takes a truly uninspired set of actors, director and crew to make Uwe Boll look decent in comparison. Alleged MENSA member Chinsee does this, and then some. His dialog is lackluster; the thing is, many action flicks share this problem. Nor is the pacing the only culprit. Many films suffer from poor pacing.

This waste of celluloid looks like a rehearsal takes of a bad movie. Especially the combat scenes. Poorly edited, execrably shot, with novice actors who can barely deliver their lines, let alone wield weapons.

I am amazed anyone paid money to this genius to make this. But I shouldn't be. This direct to DVD stuff has gotten more prevalent since the recession hit in late 2007.

Save yourself some time. If you want see a vendetta movie, get the Chun Li flick with Kristin Kreuk. She actually can fight, and act. Or just watch season 1 (or season 2) of Maggie Q's Nikita.

The auteur's bio says he went to medical school. Chinsee is hopefully better at medicine than he is at filmmaking. Or his patients are in serious trouble.
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1/10
Really?
nostrovia7027 August 2013
Who rates these movies so high? They lack in everything. Just another low budget company putting out low budget crap. The action was sub-par, the camera work was shotty and unoriginal. The story overall was less than mediocre and no imagination put into it. I've seen high school student films better. I have a feeling the majority of the ratings this movie has received and many like it creators of the movie putting in their two cents to hike up the rating on their otherwise terrible attempt at a movie. Drama, action...?? Where? The terrible acting is just, yet, another factor that adds to this complete failure of a film. I've seen Uwe Boll movies better than this and he's the worse director in the industry.
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1/10
Worst comedy EVER!
AubreyKloppers27 August 2013
This must be the worst comedy ever!

Expecting to see great lines and hear large laughter, House of Cards Directed, Produced, Costume Designed, Written and Starring Ian Chinsee is not getting my vote in any of the comic/comedy genre this year.

I was most disappointing with the 14 people (obviously all Ian Chinsee) who voted this 10/10. Anybody voting anything less than 3 have at least one brain cell.

Paying for this is going to cost you money. Watching this is going to cost you time. Thinking this is funny... Not so much! In a nutshell, I would not let my worst enemy watch this dribble!
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9/10
BrisVegas
jloftus128 September 2013
I did not think, given the description of this film that I would like it. I thought in my naivety, what could the writer know of the gangster life, being a boy from a privileged background? However, to me, he has got it just right.

What I found interesting is, you don't really know what someone has going on behind the facade, what level of experience someone really has, until you see them in action. I can never tell when someone is having me on. When they say, e.g. I am a great chess champion, a fighter (I can usually pick bullshit a mile away here) but, if someone has a background different to mine, maybe they can kick-ass, who the knows. There are all kinds of criminals, many who chase the gangster life acting against type, rebellion, poor judgment, idiot syndrome ... the list goes on.

Despite my earlier reservations, I found myself drawn into what was going on behind the actor's eyes, the glimpse into them, did they know something about the world they were depicting, was there tension, fear, secrets. They convinced me. I wanted to see what would happen. Turn the next page.

It is a world of secret societies and ancient martial arts collectives ... what not to like.

If you are a fighter ... the moment you face your opponent ... then, the bullshit is over ... the mind-set behind the man, the school of thought, what they a part of, is revealed. Then ... effectiveness is evident, the brilliance of those who went before, those who built the system, live once more. The house we lived in brought again to life.

Ian Chinsee played a convincing practitioner, a man in over his head, but a warrior to the end compelled by his code to act with Honor. He made me believe he could and would do these things, which I am sure he can.

The stuff behind the eyes the sense of an insight into who the actors are revealed by the scenes they inhabit, gave a tantalizing glimpse of who they really are. I liked the commitment to being their film version, selves.

I liked the plot. As a lover of the Bruce Lee phenomenon, I loved the fight scenes. I can see some of my favorite films celebrated and referenced in Ian Chinsee's film. Fist Of Fury, Enter The Dragon.

And, last of all, all these people make films on Brisbane. Brisbane, actors, writers, cinematographers, making our city look like a bloody international city worthy of a movie.
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