- Peter Griffin: Let's face it, there's only one drinking spot for us and it's the clam.
- Glen Quagmire: But Peter it's closed, we can't go in there.
- Peter Griffin: Quagmire, when a girl says she doesn't wanna have sex with you do you take that as an answer?
- Glen Quagmire: [a man walks up to Quagmire and whispers in his ear, then leaves] My lawyer has advised me not to answer that question.
- Peter Griffin: [a Past Generation of the friends is drinking in the Clam] To the Clam!
- Glen Quagmire: To the Clam!
- Joe Swanson: To the Clam!
- Joe Swanson: And to mind-damaging STDs!
- Glen Quagmire: I wake up with blood on my penis-pillow!
- Peter Griffin: I'm going to die an old man in a chair, staring out to sea and going slowly insane!
- Glen Quagmire: [Speaking at the softball game] Hey Goldman's Pharmacy, can you fill out a prescription for diarrhea? Because we're about to get the runs.
- Funeral Director: [Speaking to Meg] You have what we call a closed casket face.