How I Met Your Mother (TV Series)

Bedtime Stories (2013)

Neil Patrick Harris: Barney Stinson

Photos 

Quotes 

• Barney Stinson : Thus my friends I have become through methods somewhat gory, the Player King of New York City. Boom. The End. True Story.

• Marshall Eriksen : [voiceover narration]  He rose to go approach this girl who commanded such intrigue, when Mommy interrupted...

  Lily Aldrin : Dude, she's way out of your league! She's not in Daisy Dukes nor squeezed into a Hooters tee, and I don't see a Curves membership dangling from her key. She has no glaring spray tan, no unicorn tattoos. She's sipping chardonnay, not pounding cherry-flavored booze. Her makeup isn't running. She's not playing with her hair. There's very little chance she'll let you put it anywhere.

  Barney Stinson : Your challenge is accepted, Lil. There is no girl too pretty, for I am Barney Stinson, Player King of New York City!

• Tuxedo Charlie : The Agreement of 2004 quite clearly did define Fifth Avenue to be our hunting grounds' dividing line! Your West Side college girls are not the slip I park my boat in, so you shall know my East Side debutantes are quite verboten!

• Barney Stinson : The international dateline, that's right new theory. What's that you ask?

  Ted Mosby : Nobody did.

  Barney Stinson : I'll now address your query.

• Captain Bill : You all know me, and you all respect my game: I dress up like a pilot and meet girls in Baggage Claim.