Brad Jones: Cinema Snob

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• [first lines] 

  Cinema Snob : Well, the Patreon viewers have decided and between a list of choices that included a Syfy original movie and a porno spoof, the clear winner of this week's episode is a goddamn '80s romantic melodrama? What the fuck? That's like doing a viewer's choice on bad Chicago movies and having "Blues Brothers 2000" and "Poltergeist 3" beaten out by "Windy City"! And what is with forgotten '80s romance movies having a poster color scheme that makes them look post-apocalyptic? Look, I thought the porno spoof was gonna win too or maybe I just hoped it would since that would take far less time and get far more hits, but "ID" '83 was ahead by so much that I ended up calling it 12 hours before voting ended, which made the "Daysaster" bros very unhappy. So basically Patreon subscribers paid their hard earned money to be bored! A common theme in the thread seemed to be that people thought "ID" '83 was gonna be along the lines of "Moment by Moment" or "Endless Love". Have we gotten so cynical that the suggestion of any romance means it's gonna be an unholy disaster of "Moment by Moment" proportions? You coulda just asked me! The answer is no! Or you coulda just watched the trailer!