"A Series of Unfortunate Events" The Ersatz Elevator: Part Two (TV Episode 2018) - Lucy Punch as Esmé Squalor

Esmé Squalor : Sleep is a natural part of life, like cosmetics or frivolous lawsuits.
Esmé Squalor : I love a happy ending. It's like Wuthering Heights, which I never read.
Esmé Squalor : You can't open this box until you give me the money. That's illegal.

Violet Baudelaire : What's illegal is auctioning off children!

Esmé Squalor : Not everywhere.
Count Olaf : Have you never even heard of banana daiquiris?

Esmé Squalor : Bananas aren't in.

Count Olaf : Oo, we'll see about that.
Esmé Squalor : There's nothing quite like a luxurious 46-course lunch followed by a handful of hot pickled fish and several lengthy musical numbers.

Count Olaf : You flatter me.
Jerome Squalor : Esmé, love of my life, I am tired of being treated this way. 206!

Esmé Squalor : Well, maybe I'm tired of you. 207!

Bidder : Maybe I'm tired of both of you! 208!

Larry : I'm tired of failure and hopelessness in the face of treachery and doom. 209!

Count Olaf : I'm tired of self-indulgent existential crises and an overabundance of hardcover books. 210.
Count Olaf : You really are starting to grow as a thesbian.

Esmé Squalor : Thesbian? Well, I *do* love horses.
Esmé Squalor : All my life I've climbed the ladder of success armed only with ruthless ambition and a large inheritance. I've paid my dues for weeks to become the city's sixth most important financial advisor, to become this statuesque powerhouse that stands gorgeously before you. I had the whole world at my remarkably small feet.

Lucy Punch: Esmé Squalor