Disenchantment (TV Series)

The Princess of Darkness (2018)

Abbi Jacobson: Bean

Photos 

Quotes 

• Bean : [high on snake root]  Wow. My God, you guys, we should start a band.

  [They start clapping rhythmically] 

  Bean : Yes, we sound amazing. We'll fix up an old carriage and tour the country, playing what we want to play, never selling out, never splitting up. Elfo, you're out of the band!

  Elfo : What the hell?

  Bean : We're a duo now. The fans didn't even notice. Luci, you fell off a balcony, or were you pushed? We'll never find out. Dreams come true because I am a solo act now! The fans love my voice. I have dreadlocks, but then I shave my head, like a true artist. Why is the crowd booing? Oh no, I'm the talentless one! Elfo, you came back! Luci, I thought I pushed you. I mean, we're together again. Let's get out there. We're back on top. Nothing will stop us now. Oh no, I have cancer. What?

  [She collapses] 

  Elfo : I dedicate this next song to the memory of Bean.

  [Elfo and Luci start clapping again. Bean cheerfully sits up and joins in] 

• Bean : Remember, the trick to not getting swept over the waterfall is swimming upstream.

  Elfo : Got it. Now, what's "swimming"?

• Bean : If anyone asks, just be honest and say she was alive when we ran away.

  Luci : Some might say her cries for help were a cry for help, but I think she was just being an attention whore.

• Elfo : You'll be amazed how much fun I am on my own.

  [Bean puts flower in the basket] 

  Elfo : [chuckles]  That's not a daisy.

  Bean : What?

  Elfo : [chuckles]  You put a dandelion in the daisy basket.

  Bean : So?

  Elfo : So, we're making a daisy chain, not a dandelion chain. Why even bother to call it a daisy chain if you're just gonna...

  [crying] 

  Elfo : Oh, God. I'm so sorry! I lied! I'm not really fun. The pressure... it just got to me!

  [gasps] 

  Elfo : And then the pressure to sustain the lie? Oh, God, it was a nightmare!

• Big Jo : Jokes are a sign of fear. A fear that is well justified.

  Luci : Hold on. There's something I've always wanted to try.

  [He starts spinning Bean's head around a-la-Pazuzu] 

  Luci : So cool! I didn't even know that the human body could do this!

  Bean : ...It can't...

  [She falls back on the bed and her body unspins the entire way] 

• Bean : [swallowing the snake root]  I don't know. I'm not really feeling anything.

  Luci : Me either.

  Elfo : Me either. Me either. M'either. Meither. Meither, meither, meither, meither, meither, meither, meither. Meither. What's happening?