Look, I feel bad for this lady and her dead husband but my god this episode is slow. Almost nothing happens for 45 minutes. Every time they break for a commercial the replay the last 3 minutes that happened so you get to see almost the whole boring episode twice. This entire episode could have been told in 15 minutes. In order to make it last an hour they padded it with a ton of useless back story about how they started their Karaoke business that adds nothing to the story. I guess they were supposedly trying to build suspense but it just crawls endlessly. Almost no details on the stalker are given. By the end I was ready to shoot myself.
Reviews
9 Reviews
State of Emergency
(2011)
Irritatingly stupid characters
12 January 2015
This movie suffers from mediocre acting and mediocre dialog. Relatively early on the survivors are in a safe, secure facility with food, water, guns and electricity. The only way to add drama is to make them act as stupidly as possible in order to put themselves in danger. If I was stuck with these people the question "What the f*** is wrong with you?" would be continuously coming out of my mouth.
There is absolutely not one new thought or idea in this. It is a mixture of "28 Days Later" and "The Crazies" without being even slightly as interesting as either one. It comes across as someones class project with the goal to be the most derivative zombie flick of all time. Skip it.
There is absolutely not one new thought or idea in this. It is a mixture of "28 Days Later" and "The Crazies" without being even slightly as interesting as either one. It comes across as someones class project with the goal to be the most derivative zombie flick of all time. Skip it.
The House of the Devil
(2009)
Don't believe the rating
6 December 2013
I watched this after seeing the 6.4 rating it has here. After virtually nothing happened for the first 45 minutes I was seriously doubting the rating system. I understand slowly building tension and suspense but this is the most boring day-in-the-life of a college student I've ever seen. Nothing happens that is interesting or not completely predictable. The "action" all happens in about the last 15 minutes and it is exactly what you would expect. I've watched better films that had a 4.5 rating. The acting, while decent, has no where to go and nothing to say. Save 90 minutes of your life and skip this. The cinematography is uninspired and the "special effects" almost too minimal to be considered special. Some effort at a "twist" ending is attempted but it is so unbelievable and clichéd it annoys more than adds to the picture.
Shuttle
(2008)
I feel soiled.
24 October 2012
Warning: Spoilers
I guess I am having a hard time understanding why anyone would make this movie. 107 minutes of brutality and torture. For what? I understand having this as a setup for the payoff but THERE ISN'T ONE! Yes, the movie was suspenseful at times but it dragged on forever and the pacing was horrible. About an hour in I started fast forwarding it to get it over with. I really wish I had the time i spent watching this back, And BTW, what happened to the note/signed message she left at the store? Nothing? More wasted time. It's like someone took "Taken", took out all the exiting and rewarding parts and just made a version where the kidnappers win. And by the third time the driver survives what should be crippling injuries it just got ridiculous. A complete waste of time and effort.
Riddles of the Sphinx
(2008 TV Movie)
Fair for SciFi, Bad for anywhere else
28 September 2008
A hacky pastiche of Indiana Jones, Lara Croft and a little of "The Librarian", with mediocre acting, a non-sensical script, and a shape-changing sphinx who is alternately mediocre CGI and laughable human. While not as truly vile as some of the SciFi channel offerings, there is little else to recommend this. You could find a worse way to waste two hours, but you would have to try. As usual, everywhere in the world (Greece, Iraq, etc.) look just like where the movie was shot, in this case Canada. The sets are either obviously something else (power plant standing in for secret underground base) or so minimal (burned out 50 gallon drums for Iraqi war zone, a few Styrofoam pillars for Greek ruins) as to be distractingly laughable. Everyone continues to shoot at the obviously bulletproof monster, and if you can't guess who the traitor is I hope your babysitter didn't ruin it for you.
Living Hell
(2008 TV Movie)
Much better than most SciFi movies
24 February 2008
This is easily one of the better SciFi channel offerings. Competently acted, directed and written it was enjoyable and well worth watching. The only sub-standard aspect was some of the computer generated effects (blood spatter, fire) were distractingly unrealistic. The storyline certainly borrowed from other movies, but there were enough novel touches to keep it interesting. The pace drags a little toward the end, but it is head and shoulders above much of the dreck they have put out over the years.
I hope this signals a commitment on the part of the SciFi channel to improve their offerings. How the same channel can produce superb fare like "The Lost Room" also produces crapfests like "Path of Destruction" baffles me.
I hope this signals a commitment on the part of the SciFi channel to improve their offerings. How the same channel can produce superb fare like "The Lost Room" also produces crapfests like "Path of Destruction" baffles me.
Showdown at Area 51
(2007)
About average for the SF channel
16 December 2007
Warning: Spoilers
Let's start with the things that are patently idiotic. Area 51 isn't in the desert as we have all been told, it's actually in a national park near St. Louis! Apparently that whole desert thing is just Government misdirection. Damn clever! Can you say "tax break for setting your film in our crappy backyard"? Apparently, a group of bad Aliens, the "Cronen" are waiting for us to generate enough pollution to meet their needs when they they will swoop in, kill us all and swipe our toxic waste. When the requisite female scientist asked the obvious question "Why kill us, we'd be glad to give them all they want for free" the only answer is "They don't negotiate". What are they, the Bush Administration? Not to mention the obvious fact that if they kill us all our ability to generate more pollution is zero, whereas if they just hauled it all away we'd make more than ever (just imagine if the EPA removed all restrictions, we would be a toxic goldmine). This is kind of like harvesting apples by cutting down the trees with a chainsaw and burning the stumps. And what kind of civilization doesn't know how to create pollution? The Bizarro world? "Me make car runs on smog and makes clean air. Me sad." Anyway, the plot revolves around a good alien sent here by someone to try to stop them by shutting down the "Omega Seed", which is the alien sensor that determines when the pollution level is adequate for harvesting. Turns out it's buried under a futuristic manhole cover in a barn. Makes you wonder what the farmer thought it was. "Dang it Clem, I done told ya not to park the tractor on the Omega Seed". The acting is semi-adequate, with the standout being Gigi Edgely, much missed since Farscape got axed ( a show superior in every conceivable way). Watching her try, and occasionally fail, to hide her Aussie accent is enchanting. The SFX and fight scenes are OK. All in all, better than most SF movies, which makes it just sub-par for anyone else.
Path of Destruction
(2005 TV Movie)
Eh.
25 September 2005
Poor acting, mediocre CGI and technical ignorance abound in this time filler. Some of the plot points don't hold up to even the barest scrutiny. They draft a bimbo reporter to serve as bombardier when they have an entire base of Air Force personnel to pick from? They push for an EMP bomb over a nuclear blast (the biggest EMP bomb there is, BTW) because radiation is too non-directional like shotgun pellets? Dental braces attract lightning? Come on. And why are molecular disassemblers causing storms and hail anyway? Even the bad acting and video game quality CGI could be tolerated with a little technical competence. The underlying concept is OK but the execution is pretty bad. Trying to guess which eastern European country is substituting for Alaska (and the winner is...... Bulgaria!) was fun. And David Keith and Stephen Furst chew the scenery in amusing if one-note performances. Any time you can completely and totally describe a character with two words, like horny yokel or corporate greedhead, you're in trouble.
I've watched worse, though. And can't David Keith get any better roles than these second rate Sci-fi channel crapfests? Every month he's in at least one (two this month) of these celluloid WMD's. He used to be somebody. Maybe he figured, "Hell, I'm already in Bulgaria filming Epoch 2, I'll just knock another one off while I'm over here". Maybe the beer's cheap. Who knows.
I've watched worse, though. And can't David Keith get any better roles than these second rate Sci-fi channel crapfests? Every month he's in at least one (two this month) of these celluloid WMD's. He used to be somebody. Maybe he figured, "Hell, I'm already in Bulgaria filming Epoch 2, I'll just knock another one off while I'm over here". Maybe the beer's cheap. Who knows.
Code Name: Heraclitus
(1967 TV Movie)
Unique
22 April 2000
I haven't seen this movie in 30+ years but many of it's ideas were so unique that I still remember them clearly. The "hero" is a government agent with no memories of his past and no emotions. As a reward for services rendered, he is informed of his past: that he was an American traitor who defected to the Chinese and was badly injured in an accident and returned to American custody. All his memories were destroyed due to brain damage, which also accounts for his inability to feel emotion. This, of course, makes him a perfect agent. Leslie Nielson does a marvelous job as his handler, whose cynical and callous actions show the Hero that even though he's deficient in some areas, he's superior in others. Much better and more original than many "spy" movies and worth watching.
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