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The Pyramid (2014)
One of the most underrated horror flicks in years
30 October 2015
Warning: Spoilers
This is probably one the most underrated horror flicks in years.

Yes, there are many "found footage" or "shaking camera" movies, but none like this one. I mean, we have a bunch of ghosts and things like that in these movies. Spooky pyramids and ancient Egyptian mummies, yes, of course, the horror movie industry is full of those since the black & white era.

But this flick is not about that. I did not read any reviews or information about this movie before watching it and I must say I did not see it coming. A real life Anubis walking around and doing his routine trapped inside the pyramid? Hey! That's amazing! It's very original and entertaining!

You might bash the poor CGI or other filming issues, but, come on, it's one of the most fun to watch and atmospheric horrors in years!

Highly recommended for Ancient Egyptian horror fans!
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London (I) (2005)
Waste of feelings
1 May 2007
This movie is just another example of wasting very strong feelings on some egocentric and dishonest person who is not able to realize the price of breaking up for stupid reasons. Such a person doesn't deserve to be loved by anyone, anyhow. Maybe just during an one night stand.

Syd has given away his emotions and thoughts as well to his former lover London and tries to get her back. The problem is that since they broke up Syd turned into a really messed up drug taking alcoholic. That's another fact that proves his everlasting love for London.

London doesn't want him back, but why should she? Syd is just a drug sniffing madman now. It doesn't matter to her that this drama is her fault. No way...

7 out of 10 for the acting, but against the excessive and unnecessary drug use.
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Santa's Slay (2005)
Greatest "Evil Santa" movie ever
30 December 2006
It's not that kind of slayer movie with a psycho dressed in a Santa costume, but a fantasy horror comedy with the "real" Santa Claus who is actually a demon that lost a bet with an Angel in ancient times.

Because he lost the bet, he must be a good guy and give presents to kids for Christmas, but after 1000 years he has the right to get back to his evil habits and now he suddenly becomes a slayer Santa.

The movie is really interesting and entertaining. Even if there are a lot of sadistic killings, they are not scary and would never be dangerous to kids. So let them watch this movie without restrictions.

I give it a 10 out of 10 for the very well done black humor.
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Pulp Fiction (1994)
An all time masterpiece
15 December 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Quentin Tarantino is absolutely fabulous! His directing is so realistic that he is able to make even a fantasy movie look so real. PULP FICTION is not an exception from the rule.

The most delicious part of this masterpiece is not the action, but the memorable dialogs. You'll never forget the lines of JULES (Samuel L. Jackson) including the Ezekiel 25:17 quote, the DEAD N. STORAGE joke (Quentin Tarantino), or the intelligent lines of MIA (Uma Thurman).

The interesting issue about this movie is that, like in all the other Taranantino movies, the action is unpredictable. I'm sure nobody expected that VINCENT (John Travolta) would be killed, specially because he was the main wiseguy besides JULES. Also the case for MARSELLUS (Ving Rhames), the boss who got raped.

Because of these you'll have your breath taken away for the whole 2 1/2 hours of the movie, and when you'll see the closing credits you'll be very disappointed that it's over.

Definitely 10 out of 10 for the directing and the acting.
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Boring mess
6 November 2006
This kind of exorcism movie makes you realize that anything else than "The Exorcist (1973)" is a crap, not just for the story or the acting, but for the ambiance of the film. Nothing compares to the old 70s horror movies.

"The Exorcist" makes any other movie look like a bad remake of it and causes disgust in the eye of the viewer.

About Gail's exorcism is nothing much to say. Maybe the fact that she looks to be aware of being possessed and enjoys it every second. She's more like a drunk slut exposing herself to males during blackouts and wakes then up in embarrassment.

When possessed Regan MacNeil exposed herself in "The Exorcist" it was anything but attractive, sexy or even obscene. It was probably the most scary part of the movie. I can't remember to have been scared by Gail Bowers putting her hand in her panties.

3 out of 10 for the pantie scene.
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Greatest love story on screen
2 October 2006
Warning: Spoilers
I think this is the greatest love story on screen. Why? Well... because it's real? What I'm trying to say is that this is not one of those fantasy love stories with overreactions and incredible scenes like in the spectacular "Titanic". It's just a bit of realistic romance.

The acting was so great that even a guy like me has been so profoundly touched by this movie that I almost cried at the end (I'm not joking!!!). Fabulous performance! It's the type of movie that makes you identify yourself with the same gender character towards the opposite gender character. Celine was so lovable that I must admit I had a crush on her the first time I saw the movie. I felt like being Jesse and holding her in my arms.

The most romantic moment is when they "photograph" each other in the morning they have to say goodbye. It's pure love without sexuality (even if they talk a lot about it) because their feelings are not sexual at all.

It's so foolish they don't exchange phone numbers and addresses and make such an unpractical deal to meet again at the station after 6 months. It's so stupid they don't acknowledge what they lose if they say goodbye. It's so sad they don't get together forever...

Definitely 10 out of 10 for the story, for the directing and of course for the perfect acting.
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Dead End (I) (2003)
Great thriller
27 September 2006
It's an excellent thriller about a car accident that generates a very scary ghost story. Usually I don't enjoy ghost movies because most of them are boring, but this one is what I always expected from such a movie.

The movie itself has a very little gore effect, but the scary parts are actually the hidden things like those chopped corpses found on the road of whom we see nothing or just a bit. There is dark humor as well that's like salt and pepper to the film because it plays with your emotions by inserting funny scenes in the scary ones.

Important to mention is that you have to watch it carefully in order to understand the story because it might make no sense to you otherwise.

10 out of 10 because it's a great thriller!
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One of the most unrealistic movie ever made
10 August 2006
Warning: Spoilers
This is one of the most unrealistic movie ever made. The story is stupid and the film looks like a kung fu flick from the '70s with flying people during the acrobatic fights.

From a sequel of Desperado I would have expected more of Salma and Banderas as the passional Latino couple. Instead Salma gets killed from the start and Banderas becomes the kind of Mexi-can Superhero.

I almost forgot: Johnny, what the hell are you doing in this movie? Are you completely out of your mind? What happened to you, man? It was a good start for Salma and Banderas, but this is not a movie for stars like you!

5 out of 10 because Salma looks gorgeous and Banderas is cool!
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Collective paranoia
9 August 2006
Warning: Spoilers
This story looks more like an account of a collective paranoia case generated by a mentally insane kid, and not a ghost story.

Twelve years old Ryan is pathologically afraid of the dark, suffering from some bizarre nyctophobia caused by being trapped in a dark basement years ago. His insanity makes you wanna punch him to sanity once for all.

Instead he has an older brother Dale who doesn't believe him in the first place, but starts to get scared by him. Dale has a girlfriend who's in some kind of platonic relationship with him (very cute subplot).

So one night the two brothers are left alone by their parents who go to a party. During the night Ryan drives Dale crazy with his fear that the lights in the house might go off and the "living darkness" could get him. Then both of them start to see creepy faces and hear scary noises. That's the point in the movie when you get nervous because you expect an explanation for what's happening, but you don't get any clue besides the clinical one.

The whole madness comes to an end in the morning when the sunlight scares the "ghosts" away. That would never happen to real ghosts, but we are talking about made up ghosts produced by a damaged mind.

5 out of 10 because I watched it with the speakers turned loud on and some scenes were scary because of the noise.
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Ginger Snaps (2000)
Bloody nonsense
30 July 2006
I thought this might be a nice werewolf movie, but it turned out to be a bloody nonsense about two brain damaged teen sisters, Ginger and Brigitte.

One night they meet a werewolf on the playground of the town and Ginger gets scratched and bitten by the beast. During this time Ginger has her first period and suddenly turns into an aggressive teen slot because, hey, that's what happens to a girl when she becomes woman (?!) and has been previously "playing" with a wolf-man (??!!).

Her scared sister Brigitte, who seems to be on drugs (even though she's not the one who's smoking weed in the movie), is trying to prevent Ginger from becoming a beast.

Will she succeed in suppressing the werewolf curse flowing through her sister's veins? I will let you find that out by yourself. In the meantime I'll go watch a real werewolf movie.

1 out of 10 because it's an affront to any teen girl having her first period...
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A gore marathon
23 June 2006
"Beyond the Limits" was a big surprise for me since I am very disappointed in the latest movies concerning the special effects because I hate those cartoon-like computer effects. Olaf Ittenbach is absolutely fabulous as the gore master from Germany because he likes to do the FX the classic way without the help of computer animation.

The movie is composed of two "Tales from the Crypt"-like stories and the main subject is the trip of the "eternal heart" through time, from the alchemistic Middle Age to present days, causing a gore marathon on its way.

The main characters are sadistic psychos who really enjoy to torture and kill their victims in the most gory way someone could imagine. The acting is quite good and impressive for this kind of movie because it makes you really feel the terror and pain of the victims.

This is not a scary movie, it's just a very well done splatter horror from Europe, much better then many Hollywood movies of the genre.

I give it a 10 out of 10 because Olaf Ittenbach rules!
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