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jaylemieux-23237
Reviews
Life of Belle (2024)
It's a 6/10
It was interesting, but yes, it was in fact SLOW. However, it worth watching simply because it doesn't suck. I read some comments from people who didn't get the ending. I don't know, I guess it was pretty straight forward to me after you factor in how the mother was acting. You sort of had the creepy factor a lot as the rooms and halls were usually dark. My advice to someone is not have no background lights on when you watch this or you will miss something.
There were 9 or 10 total actors in the movie. Two of the actors were excellent and very believable. You could tell they were either well trained or just did they normal thing and acted like themselves. Those two were very believable and good. ALL the others were the adults.
Dark Harvest (2023)
It's really 7.5 out of 10
VERY mild spoilers.
I can't imagine why someone with any interest in horror would not find this movie at least very watchable. My only thought is that this movie started out and I felt like I might see something revolutionary, but at the end of the day, it was pretty much Children of the corn and a little Jeepers Creepers slushed into a few other really good movies.
The thing that gets me, is that I've watched it twice and I'm still not sure how the pumpkin dude comes to be. I follow all the concepts of the farming town, and crops and all that jazz, but most other movies like this, they make some effort to say "Well this happens because..." at the end. I'm not dissapointed that I don't know, but after I write this, I'm going to go out and read some peoples thoughts on it and see if I can tie anything together!
If you like good, standup horror and some decent blood splattering, that's not overboard, then this is a must see.
My one statement of advice I just gave my son when I told him to watch it...Be patient.
7.5 out of 10, but I gave it 8 because It's better than 6!!
Episode 50 (2011)
This was SO BAD...
How bad was it!!!
It was so bad that at about the 40 minute mark, I really considered not finishing it.
But I hung in there until the end mostly just because I wanted to see how they could end this disaster, and it figured out to be pretty much the same garbage as usual.
There's those movies where the acting is bad
Then there's those movies where the effects are terrible
Then there's those movies where the story is awful
Then, every once in a while, you get the added bonus to see all three of these in one movie. Warning: This is one of those movies.
The acting was so bad. I don't understand why people in FFF actually "act". The best FFF have people who are just being people and seeing things or whatever. TBWP is a good example. Those 3 hit the woods and just did their thing. The first Paranormal Activity had 2 actors, and instead of acting, they just did their thing and lived the parts.
This movie, painfully acted.
If you watch it all, you will see the classic definition of a bad horror/FFF.
For real, if you have nothing better to do, like you are in prison, and this is the only film being played on TV, watch it. If you are not being forced to watch it, DON'T.
I have seen a few movies that were worse, but this was so close it would be a bottom 5 movie.
V/H/S Viral (2014)
Read the reviews but...
There is one part of this tragedy that is acttually kind of fun to watch. The entire part with the magician is great. In fact, I'd think making a movie about that kind of thing would be great. I'm sure somewhere out there is a movie like that, but I don't know for sure!
The rest of it is petty dull and forgettable. I'd put this VHS movie on the shelf and forget it.
Please do read the reviews by other people also. Most of them are accurate and tell the truth about how really dumb this flick is. It's too bad that they added this to the V/H/S franchise. But then, Jason Goes to Hell was a terrible addition to Friday the 13th and it still made money!
You'll need to be wide awake to watch 3/4ths of this or you'll nod off and miss the best part. I only give it 4 stars because of the Dante part of the movie.
Ghosts of Amityville (2022)
Really bad
I'm only giving this 2 stars because the girl is a tough cookie.
The movie has a runtime of 70 minutes, which is about 60 minutes too long. There's a 1:09 preview video that about covers it all. If you watch that, you will see just about everything you need.
On thing is was so tiring was...is she sleeping or not. I mean it was one scream after the next, followed by her waking up and looking around. It got old fast, and the end didn't exactly tell us what happened.
Also, in case you didn't notice, Amityville is now in Spain. I'll bet the people that live there would be interested in knowing that!
Pass on this. It really is a drag and while isn't not confusing, it's really confusing....sleeping...not sleeping...UUUGGGGHHHHH.
Amityville: Mt. Misery Rd. (2018)
I've said this a few times before...
As a person who seeks out horror and FF films, I have seen a lot of really bad movies. But, most of them are bad only on 1 or 2 levels.
Some have zero plot and the story stinks.
Some have bad acting, and it's hard to watch them fumble through lines that are bad.
Some have no idea where they are going with it, and it just flops.
Then, there's a few that are just really bad, and meet the criteria of all three.
This is one of those.
I have written the words "This is the worst movie I've ever seen" a few times in the past, and meant it...until now.
This is the WORST movie I've ever seen.
We spent the first 15 minutes watching him drive his car.
Then another 15 minutes of him showing off his wife's a__.
Then they got on the plane for 10 minutes.
Then, the movie actually got worse.
Everything in the woods was terrible and poorly acted. Plus, like most movies that use the word "Amityville", it had nothing to do with it. I'm not sure how this guy convinced the owners of the movie rights to use the word "Amityville" to give the green light to use that name on this trash. A lot of the movies that use that word are really bad, but I'm not sure any of them are this bad.
For real: This is the worst FFF I've ever seen. Please...don't watch it, and if you have to watch it because you have some strong desire to lose 90 minutes of your life for no reason, do NOT pay a nickel to see it. PLEASE!!!
Acting: 0.00000703 out of 10
Plot: 0.00004 out of 10
Story idea: 0.0000109 out of 10
Music: 0.000000054 out of 10
His wife's a _ _: 7 out of 10
Overall rating: 1 out of 10.
Night Court (2023)
It's only getting 3 stars because...
Every once in a while, John Larroquette says something that is quite funny like the old Night Court.
I have tried so hard to judge this for what it is...not the old show. But, I just don't think it's remotely funny or even a little interesting. I am still watching it just in case, as I said before, Dan comes out of hiding. I also think it's a terrible mistake to have Dan being a defense lawyer. I mean lets face it, some of the stuff he said in the original was so funny I still laugh about it today!
Gurgs...not funny. The gal who is the ADA, not funny at all. I hate that it's just not funny.
I hope it goes quietly into cancellation after season 2 just because it's not...funny.
Dang, I really wanted to like this. I was so excited. :-(
Amityville: The Resurgence (2022)
Not even close to 10/10
I love it when you read reviews and they all sound the same. No one who wrote a review had it less than 10/10. I don't think so.
Tell you what, I'll review this as someone who doesn't work for the company that made the movie.
For the most part, it was pretty good. It started out as most Amityville movies do, with the background of what happened and such which most people probably know already.
Once it got rolling, the EVP work and all that was decent and there were a lot of places where you thought, "Hey, that's pretty slick", and so forth.
I'm not sure I buy on the idea that the voices coming through could "sound" like the actual dead people. That was a bit of a stretch, but it made for interesting filming and I guess the idea that John DeFeo was talking to them directly was cool, but again, not convinced you can listen to a dead person in the voice they had IRL.
I did learn that the village is populated with rich snobs and they don't like strangers. I can see that as being true!
Listen, it was decent, and as someone who will watch just about anything with respect to that house, I give it a solid 5 stars. But not even close to 10.
Hell House LLC Origins: The Carmichael Manor (2023)
After further review...
I was really excited to see this, and while we know it's tough to make FFF these days, I'd say that this was not quite as fun as I thought it would be. I hate to dis on anything to do with this series or Mr. Cognetti. I LOVE the Hell House LLC movies. Each one is sort of has that nice tie affect to the others, yet stands alone in it's own space.
That's probably the only really cool thing about this movie was that it really did bring the other 3 films into it at some points and you could see the references.
Originally, I wrote a fairly long review of this movie and after I watched it again, I decided to change it and start over. I think the first time I watched it, I was distracted and didn't really see anything correctly. It's good to use the rewind button once in a while!
On second viewing, I decided this movie is actually really creepy. I had missed some key elements from the first viewing that make more sense now.
Oh balance, this is a decent flick. I gave it 5 stars simply because it was, in fact, suspenseful and creepy as hell most of the time. These people go from one unexplained issue to another and the silver masked woman peeking around the corner was just great! Plus they found out who it was, and that made it even better.
My suggestion to anyone who is a fan of the Hell House LLC films, pay close attention to the story here and it'll make more sense as to what is actually going on in the house. I just didn't notice it the first time.
M*A*S*H: The Abduction of Margaret Houlihan (1976)
Laughing away!
There is nothing better than an episode of MASH with Colonel Flagg in it. This one had me rolling the first time I saw it and every time since then, I still laugh away at it. "If you can't get scorpions, get 2 snakes and a rat". He was a truly funny man!
I also did like the entire episode, not just the Flagg parts. I love how Klinger just can't wake up enough to tell someone that Margaret went down the road to deliver a baby. Plus, there were excellent parts with Frank and BJ when Frank was saying they might have Margaret hanging upside down and doing unspeakable things to her and BJ say "Speak a few". Classic!
The writers of that show were brilliant and just about every episode has something that interested me, including this one.
Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny (2023)
The tale of 2 halves
It's kind of interesting. The first half of the movie is quick, action packed and what you expect from the series. Then, the 2nd half was a lot like watching a bad soap opera with the occasional action scenes thrown in there. Actually, it was somewhat depressing. Compared to Raiders and the Last Crusade, this was rough to watch and I found I was just sort of looking at the screen.
I also wanted to say that if they had never made this movie, that would have been fine also. I actually kind of got that feeling of the end from Crystal Skull, but this came out.
Again, the beginning scenes of the movie are really action packed and typical Jones stuff going on, so it takes off nice, but then it crashes at the end.
Saw X (2023)
Part X is right on the money!
This movie was interesting. I think all of us know that, for the most part, Saw is going to be one gore kill after another, and there will be some minor plot. Well, this time the plot is actually all over the movie, pretty much from start to finish. I'm not sure how to describe it, but the movie was REALLY good. Not just splatter. I'll move on from this!
At first, you figure out that you are seeing a prequel to the whole franchise, but then along the away you figure out that this happens sometime between part 3 and 4 (I think) because you see characters who are dead already. That was the fun part of it!!
I think on balance, it was the most entertaining movie in the entire series. Of course, you can never replace Saw 1 as the master of the series, but this was just easy to watch, and I believe the kills didn't over take the entire movie.
I actually hate to say this, but I'm not sure I follow the end. (The end before the credits start, then there's more after the credits.) I'm going to research this and see what other people think. You'll get it when you see it.
See it. It'll fill in a few blanks!
Fingerprints (2006)
It was pretty good actually!
I've gotten used to watch horror and FFF these days and it's either the next great thing or just about the worst thing ever. Then there was this movie.
For the basic premise of the movie, it was actually pretty interesting. A few of the actors were a bit over dramatic, but overall the whole group did pretty well.
With respect to the overall plot, at that start I was starting to think this was going to be another 2 star movie, but it built up nicely. It had a very seasoned actor in it which I enjoyed watching him.
The end had a nice twist actually. It could have ended with what happened actually being what happened, but they did spin it pretty good.
So, if you want to watch a decent horror type movie, it's going to keep you entertained and I didn't get to the end and think "There's 90 minutes I'll never get back".
I suggest it be seen as a late evening time killer!
No One Will Save You (2023)
Really decent, I think!
It's hard to write about this movie without giving away key aspects, but I'm going to give it a try!
I watched the show very closely because within a few minutes, you figure out something is going on. I like that in a movie. As a FFF lover, it can take forever to get to the point. Like an hour or something, but this movie (not a FFF), just went right into it, so I like that a lot.
On balance, I'd say the show was interesting and of course, creepy at times. I found her resilience and adapting to the situations at hand very refreshing rather than her tripping and falling then screaming.
Once things were laid out and going full speed, you can't help but start to think "This could happens some day if you like to believe in it". That was sort of something that was going in my mind.
So to the end...I'm not entirely sure I followed it, but I do have a thought or 2 as to why she ended up where she did. Again, I can't say what it's about, but when you watch the end, you'll probably form your own idea about what really did happen to her.
The movie moved right along, and it wasn't until about 10 minutes before it ended that I kind of thought "Ok, get to it now", but again it did move along in short order!
The Paranormal Diaries: Clophill (2013)
So bad...So so bad...
I didn't read any reviews before I watched this since I just bumped into it while I was channel surfing one night. But I was getting ready for bed and decided I'd watch this just for the heck of it. I did like the cover of the movie!
Unfortunately, the picture of the movie was the best part of it, because it went downhill from about 5 minutes into it. They tried to explain what they were doing there with the usual cult/bad people doing bad things idea, and that was fine. Then, as the movie rolled on and they were actually investigating it, I started to get a feeling in the back of my head that was screaming "The Blair Witch Project" over and over again, and that's exactly the rest of the movie. Chasing around nothing, seeing nothing other than some weird people chanting around the fire. I loved TBWP just as a note, but you can only do that one time folks.
If you have nothing going on, and have zero chance of watching anything else, including 2 hours of infomercials, then watch this. But, if you can watch something else, please do. It was really, really bad.
Amityville: An Origin Story (2023)
I had a thought after watching this...
Before I start off on my personal thought on the whole thing, I'd like to say the shows were really great. It was excellent to hear from Christopher Lutz and he seemed pretty clear on things after never really saying anything for 40 years. All the talk about the red room and the other people that were interviewed seemed like they knew what they were talking about. In general, I found the entire show was easy to watch and there were a LOT of pictures and video I'd never seen before. It's 9 stars for me just because I found everything to be interesting and I guess factual. If you are into watching things on this house and it's history, this is a great one to see!
That being said...
I have seen about every documentary about the house that I can find, including this one and the one with Daniel Lutz, My Amityville Horror. I like to watch the ones that explore the actual issue which was the DeFeo murders and see if anything new has come up. Usually the same thing, but I seem to get something from each of them. Then, the ones that have to deal with the Lutz's and how everything shook down with them.
I have always thought that the whole "The house is haunted" was pretty much not real. My concept was like most people think: Ron DeFeo waxed his entire family, probably whacked out on some kind of drug. I listened to him change his story over the years several times from he did it, to he and Dawn did it, to the mob did it, to the devil made him do it. I think he just did it because he was angry and a druggie.
I have always thought of Ed and Loraine Warren as pretty honest folks. So when they did their thing in the house, and she freaked out, I was skeptical because I just wasn't buying what George Lutz said most of the time.
Then after this I had a thought...
I listened to Daniel Lutz story about how George was into the occult and all that meditation stuff, and how he actually saw stuff happen in the house. I sort of didn't believe him as I think George was abusive and he might have been just angry...which I do believe.
All of a sudden, here comes Chris Lutz in this series, and he confirmed that not only did all that weird stuff happen, but George was into the occult and abusive. I really thought Chris was going to deny all this, but he didn't, and I started to think....
I don't think I ever heard anyone of the DeFeo family ever say something was wrong with the house. Other than when Ron Jr. Said the voices made him to it, but I didn't believe that as they were trying for the insanity defense. It seemed like the normal stuff with families and the fact that Ron Sr. And Jr. Didn't get along at all.
So, I thought...is it possible there was nothing wrong with the house in the first place when the DeFeo's were in there...until the Lutz's moved in and George went off the deep end with occult crap? This would explain why the Warren's saw things they did while they investigated since the investigated AFTER the Lutz's had moved out. Did George cut some entity or whatever loose in the house?
I would have never thought it was anything other than a hoax if this show had not come out. I guess since Daniel and now Chris have stated that George was a cult freak, it could be that he brought something. I'd love if Missy made some kind of statement now.
Nope (2022)
I don't know
One of things I did like about Nope was it was a great visual flick. I mean there were things going on in the sky, and on the land that were really interesting to look at.
As for the rest, I just didn't really find it all that interesting. I get the idea of a hiding spacecraft would be very unsettling, but at the same time, the whole rest of the movie was just not very interesting. There we actually times where I thought to myself that if I turned this movie off right now, I would never wonder what I missed at the end.
The premise of this flick seems pretty slick, and as I said, it's not a bad movie, just really very...unexciting.
The Blackwell Ghost 7 (2022)
I thought this was good!
I read that some people are saying that he's left his realm of having a movie fee l like a FFF by writing it and recording on the side. I get what they are saying, but I honestly don't think I care!
I like his personality, the way he handles himself and the story of his family and such. It's easy to follow from the first one how he gets to this point, even though it has nothing to do with Ruth Blackwell anymore.
I dig the way he sets up scenes like the one with the typing machine saying "Danger". If you couple that with everything else going on it the house, it's creepy!
I don't know...I guess if you think this is some mega production, it's just not, but he's doing fine!
Skinamarink (2022)
It was 60 minutes too long
Before we start, I love to watch different kinds of horror movies. I really took to FFF, and I love a good psychological movie that has at least some kind of paranormal undertone, or some kind of time loop, like Mine Games or something like that. So I will watch a movie that gets terrible ratings and I might love it.
All that being said, I'm not entirely sure what I just watched. 90 minutes of that movie was just random shots that made no sense. Rambling thoughts and ideas that we have to watch. I will say this: I was prepared for something to happen at any moment and it only really happened once.
I think it's probably one of the most boring movies I've ever seen. I like to watch movies a few times to catch things I might have missed, but this is not going to be one of those.
I know the film was shot like it was the early 1990's, but it was so dark sometimes that you are staring at a blank screen. It was just a little too much sometimes. One other thing of note: Had I not read a synopsis of the movie before I saw it, I'd probably not have caught on to the fact the doors and windows were missing. I saw a toilet disappear for sure!
I can't call this a horror movie or even much of a psychological thriller because it was neither of those. It was just 100 minutes of a camera shooting video of walls and doors.
Be very rested when you watch this. If you are tired, you may find your head bobbing up and down and you might miss....well, nothing really. Move the end of the movie to about the 30 minute mark and re-release it.
My Amityville Horror (2012)
It was interesting, until he pissed me off
As you can kind of figure out, George Lutz was a jerk. I think most people knew that already and Kathy was just a worthless mother most of the time. I mean after they left the house, they left their kids and went on a year long book tour to generate money. Not exactly parents of the year.
I spent about 75% of the movie really feeling bad for this guy. I mean lets face it, he probably had to put up with a lot of garbage from a freaky step-father and it messed him up. As I watched it, I could see that he was at least trying to find some peace, and it appears he moved into a community that respects his privacy and it's a good place for him to be.
For a person who had his knuckles crushed "Skin on skin", he plays a decent guitar. Ya, not buying that Dan.
Anyway, as the flick moves on, and as I stated earlier, I felt bad for this guy and I was glad he was getting it all out there, even if he stretched things a bit.
Until...
He gets bent out of shape because some sound guy or cameraman in the crew says he's just finding his way spiritually and isn't sure what he believes yet. Dan turns into a real a-hole about it and at that moment, I lost interest in him and frankly only watched the rest of it just to see the end. Who cares what some grip does Daniel...state your story and keep your religious feelings of others to yourself.
I'm Haunted (2022)
Eh, take it or leave it
I think some of the "Leave it" part was that while the main actress was funny and she's very pretty, she was just a little bit too happy to be in a haunted apartment. If I was to have an entity in my place, I wouldn't be so excited that I'd want to have a "yes" or "no" knocking conversation with it. The only knocking you'd hear from my place would be a moving company knocking on the door.
For the most part, it had just a few decent moments...little kids doing goofy things in the apartment. It was pretty sparse but at least it did look like it was going somewhere. When it ended, that was exactly not where I thought it was going.
It's not a waste of an hour if you are used to just basic types of scares and such.
Im Westen nichts Neues (2022)
Terrible movie 8 out of 10 stars
It was awful. Yet, it was one of the best movies I've seen in years.
Awful to watch how pointless war is and the suffering it brings. Awful to see how just simple things happening can change the course of your life dealing with anything from knowing something for sure, to just having bad luck!
The actors did sensational. The places they shot looked excellent.
One of the key things that I kept thinking about as this unfolded was with respect to what's happening right now in Ukraine.
I know this is a terrible review, I want to write so much more, but frankly I think everyone should just see it. I've watched it twice in 3 days and even though it is depressing as hell, in parts, you just have to see it.
One thing I'll say is that in a lot of WWI and to some degree WWII movies, it seems like during the fighting scenes, the people shooting the old bolt action rifles can appear to have unlimited ammo, when in reality, they had to cock the rifle each time and ran out after 5 or 6 shots before they had to stop and reload the cartridge. In this movie, you see them, in the middle of a bloody, violent battle, run out of ammo and have to sit on the ground or hide while they reload or have trouble with the bolt action. Meanwhile, the enemy is running after them and they are trying to do all this on the run. Realism was very noticeable in this excellent movie.
Found Footage of Fear (2020)
It took about 10 seconds...
It took about 10 seconds to figure out the acting would be SO BAD you wouldn't be able to stand it. It took 5 minutes to figure out the entire movie would really stink...but I endured to find that I had wasted more than an hour of my life on the worst acting and dumbest plot in history.
I like to try to review movies and see any possible good things in it, like decent jump scares or at least some kind of plot. Once in a while, you get both good acting and a good story...but in this case you get neither.
Ok I have one nice thing to say about it. The girl at the start of the movie in the car was easy to look at. But that's her only quality because her acting was horrid.
Hellraiser (2022)
It was just...not good.
Sometimes as a person who was old enough to watch these original movies when they came out, you just sort of go into the reboot and think "Great, another classic maimed by current special effects, etc".
But that wasn't so much the case in this. While the SFX were good and the story was pretty much a repeat of the original, which is expected, I didn't even find it interesting.
The pinhead character was annoying and slow. I was not even really looking at her as a very evil portrait of the original. Her acting was fine, but the lines were not evil or something. Hard to explain.
The Cenobites were simply silly looking and just kind of almost comical.
Tell you what...instead of me just going on about this movie, I'll just say this...it was really not worth the time. At least the Halloween reboot sort of gave you some context of why Michael was a lunatic from an early age. This was not even close to what you would expect from a Hellraiser movie.
Smile (2022)
Watching a person lose their mind
I think while this movie could have passed on the last 15 minutes or so, the whole movie before that was very interesting tow watch as this woman went from everyday normal, to a raving lunatic in just under 1 hour of movie time.
You had to feel for her in this. She's a doctor and just goes off the deep end. You sort of sit there, while having a few decent jump scares, and really feel like you just want to get back to the focus on her character.
I love a good, quality movie that shows you someone's spiral into madness, and you know simply by the plot that not only is that happening, she actually has a real problem with this entity thing.
If you enjoy watching someone come unglued, this is great! One of the things that bothered me was that her fiancé was there, and then suddenly he just wasn't anymore. I know they sort of give you a "breakup" thought, but they never really do and he's just gone. Kind of weird.
The last 15 minutes or so...pass. Once she burns down her childhood house (Or so you think), it's pretty much over and everything else is just filler. But I recommend it if you like this kind of movie!! Well acted!