Reviews

This modern day Prince and the Pauper meets The Parent Trap actually does not seem so bad considering that I am not a big fan (I am putting this lightly) of the Olsen Twins, or Mary Kate and Ashley as they prefer. The story is vaguely entertaining and has the prerequisite kids-are-superior-to-adults-and-know-what's-best-for-them-more-than-they-themselves-do lesson to it (Man, that's a lot of dashes...or is it hyphens? That always confused me.). On the bad side, they actually have the twins trying for accents. Mary Kate as the street-wise urchin Amanda uses a kinda New Yorky accent, but only around her fellow orphan children, surprisingly. The rest of the time she seems to talk fairly normally, which is a little inconsistent. Then again, I do not know anybody from New York, so maybe they only let their accents out when they want to? Ashley as the upper crust poor little rich girl Alyssa uses a partial British accent that consists wholly of her talking very slowly so that she can enunciate and sound all hoighty-toighty. It actually makes her sound less "well-bred" and more "bad actor." Both twins' accents often slip and they talk normally in several scenes. These details combined with the "gee, are we supposed to dislike her or something?" stepmother, the over-establishment of the vast differences in the girls' lives, an extremely rare case of identical strangers, and enough cute kids and sugary sweet moments to give any sweet tooth a headache are just some problems. I hate to be nitpicky, but during the scene where the girls are mistaken by their respective friends as the opposite girl, how come no one noticed the differences in wardrobe? Yes, they were almost similar, but one was wearing short overalls, the other long, one had a flannel shirt and the other did not, etc. Oh well, I won't lose sleep over it either way. Finally, I do recommend this movie if only to see the Olsens when they were still cute, and also because it is probably the last box office hit they will ever have. (Yes, I went there!) (Er...and I hope that Mary Kate recovers well. Hey, my heart is not total ice!)

After Buffy the Vampire Slayer was canceled, I was also on the outs with every other show I had previously watched, and had almost nothing left. There was a great big void in my TV watching schedule, and it was filled with this show. If I had only heard the description for Joan of Arcadia, I know that I would never have watched it. Let's face it, the premise alone sounds pretty lame. Fortunately, I saw a commercial for the show one day while flipping through the channels, but was still skeptical. The commercial was on again and again, incessantly telling me to watch this show, and finally I decided to give in and watch the show, even though I probably wouldn't like it. The pilot episode was good, and the episodes that followed were good as well. The Girardis are a realistic portrayal of a family, not too perfect yet not overly exaggerated either. The kids are funny and intelligent, from the snippy Joan to the dorky Luke to the sarcastic Kevin, and the parents actually seem to love each other and their kids. Joan's friends, Grace and Adam, are another highlight. Grace is great as the rebellious girl without a cause and I liked her instantly, even though I did think she was a boy. Adam, on the other hand, took me a little more time. I recognized him from when he huffed paint on 7th Heaven, which did not exactly endear me to him. By the end of the very first episode he was in, however, I fell in love with his character. What is unique about this show is that the main character talks to God, who appears in various forms and assigns Joan tasks. The tasks always have unexpected results, and there is always a message in what Joan has to do, a message that is thankfully not beat into the audience with a sledgehammer, but is subtle and genuine. This is a moving show that deals with human experience quite well. Without a doubt this is the best new show this year.

I wanted to see this movie from the very first time that I saw the preview. I visited the website for the movie once a week and watched the preview. I even wanted to see it in the theaters, which unfortunately never happened. Anyways, when I rented the movie, I had high expectations. I wanted to like this movie. Unfortunately, by the time it was over I almost hated it. The movie wasn't too bad at first, I kind of liked the plotting high school kids. The gay undertones between them were disturbing, due in large part to the constant outbursts of my mother who kept asking, "Are they gay lovers?" when she was not asking if Ryan Gosling's mother drank while pregnant because of how closely his eyes are set. On behalf of my mother, I apologize to Mr. Gosling, and his mother. Overall, the movie was not too bad when it was just a couple of kids trying to get away with murder, they just had to add a strong female detective who becomes suspicious of them for no real reason that I can think of other than that it suits the plot, and the movie goes downward until an ending that I personally hate so very much that it renders the rest of the movie unwatchable. I swore never to watch this movie again just because of that ending, and I have not.

I have a habit of commenting on movies while I watch them, even the really good ones, so this show was the most brilliant thing that I have ever seen. I am really just a recent Mistie, I started on the Sci-Fi episodes with Mike and was surprised to learn that the show began a long time ago with Joel. They are both terrific hosts, although I do like Mike a little better than Joel. Mostly, I prefer the way the Bots act towards Mike, just the way they seem to regard him as a big, lumbering, dorky human. To be fair, I have not seen very many episodes with Joel, but this was not really the case with him in the ones I did see. Less importantly, Mike has the nicest sparkling eyes and the cutest dimples. That is beside the point, because this is the single greatest thing ever created no matter who was on the show, and I can safely say that I love anyone who has ever had contact with this show. In fact, my greatest aspiration in life would be to resurrect this show. Hey, I plan on becoming a screenwriter someday, so who knows what could happen?

I absolutely loved this show! Tommy, typical jock, gets turned into a werewolf and befriends gothic Merton. Together they deal with a great spectrum of baddies ranging from a cat girl to a swamp monster, to the Buffy-spoof, Muffy the Werewolf Slayer. This show had so much going for it not just because of the great characters and cheesy monsters, but because it was just so darn funny. Every episode Merton and Tommy would exchange dialogue that played along these lines: Merton-"This is just like in [insert movie here]!" Tommy-"What happened?" Merton-"[Dialogue about career/box office/non-related movie talk]." Tommy-"No, what happened in the movie!" It happened a lot, yet it never got old. Other interesting parts include the TV-addicted older brother, Dean, Merton's hearst, and Merton's angry little sister Becky. Oh, please, ABC Family, lose the Olsen-palooza and take back Big Wolf on Campus!

I don't know what it is, but nowadays I just hate every other talk show. Actually, I do know what it is: they're not Conan. I just started watching the show about a year ago and it has ruined my taste for any other talk show host. The monologue is usually funny, at the worst times I still laugh at least once. Next comes one of the skits such as Actual Items, If They Mated, What in the World?, State Quarters, etc. These can be a little gross at times, but the funny parts are enough to make up for it. The interviews, on some talk shows, bring the show down. There are boring questions, long awkward pauses, even the guest seems bored. On Conan, though, the major thing that keeps the interview going is Conan himself. It's all about improvisation, doing a little dance, telling a little story, whatever will get it back in motion. The house band is great and the musical guests are great. Keep your Letterman and your Leno, cause I'm watching Conan!

When I heard that Jonathan Taylor Thomas was doing a movie with Devon Sawa at the height of my teenybopper stage, needless to say I was excited. The weird thing is that I still love this movie now. The plot follows the three Stouffer brothers, Marty, Mark, and Marshall, following their dreams to get out of their small town and dead-end future as mechanics and go out and film animals. Not just any animals, though, the "biggest bad-a**es of the animal kingdom," which results in a few thrilling, sometimes comic adventures for the three brothers. The brothers want the piece de resistance of their film to be an infamous cave where a group of bears are reputed to sleep together, the rumor that actually starts their trip and leads to the biggest adventure of all. This movie is full of hope that dreams can come true, as cheesy as that sounds, and is even better as it is a true story based on the naturalists behind Wild America. Great shots of animals, as well (not counting fake bear suits).

Maybe that's the reason that I actually liked this show. I thought it was funny and it was a good way to kill an hour. Thankfully, I taped one of the episodes (Hebee Jeebee's) for some reason and can now remember this show forever. On another note, does anyone else find it strange how many things Vaughn and Scotty have been in together?

I have sat down and watched this show for hours on end (it helps that I have no life), and I still like it even though I've seen every one at least once and some any number of times. I'm a child of the 80's (1983), so I can recognize a lot of the things on the show. I've seen quite a few 80's movies as a kid, such as Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, Back to the Future, The Goonies, Child's Play (very frightening for me, I haven't looked at a toy the same since), pretty much all of the classics, and watching this show makes me want to see them all over again. Very entertaining, very funny, enough to make me wish I had my Care Bear and my New Kids on the Block sleeping bag and tee-shirt back. Oh well, I'll just have to make due with all of my Pound Puppies (and my Pound Purry). My personal favorite commentators were the Barenaked Ladies.

I have sat down and watched this show for hours on end (it helps that I have no life), and I still like it even though I've seen every one at least once and some any number of times. I'm a child of the 80's (1983), so I can recognize a lot of the things on the show. I've seen quite a few 80's movies as a kid, such as Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, Back to the Future, The Goonies, Child's Play (very frightening for me, I haven't looked at a toy the same since), pretty much all of the classics, and watching this show makes me want to see them all over again. Very entertaining, very funny, enough to make me wish I had my Care Bear and my New Kids on the Block sleeping bag and tee-shirt back. Oh well, I'll just have to make due with all of my Pound Puppies (and my Pound Purry).

Sorry for any of those who actually like this drivel, but it is inexcusably awful. See smart parents who homeschool pretentious children, I think I heard without TV, thereby ensuring that they mistake the Addams Family with the Adams family (John Adams-2nd President of the United States, John Quincy Adams-son of John Adams, 6th President of the United States, the first father-son Presidents long before H.W. and W.)- Insert hysterical laughter here. See these pretentious kids want to go to public school for God-knows-why, and at this school, see how pretentious kids are *surprise* much different and smarter than the other kids. Doesn't that sound hilarious?!?!? Believe me, it isn't. The children are extremely annoying (especially the girl) and both they and their parents have these constant spacey smiles that apparently say either they are intellectually superior to everyone else, they, ahem, passed gas, or that the plants that this family grows in the basement are very strong this year (for those who can't read between the lines-they're all high). What is even more annoying is that they seem to think everyone else in their warped world is the same as them, as in knows or should know all the same things. No one is that naive! Truthfully, I did not laugh once during this show- I never even smiled. The first commercial during the break was for Dr. Pepper and contained Cyndi Lauper, the Girl's-Just-Wanna-Have-Fun-Where-Are-They-Now-I-used-to-be-famous-in-the-80 's-but-now-sing-for-soda-pop singer. Granted, the commercials don't have anything to do with the show, but I screamed and shut my TV off anyways. I apprehensively turned it back on because I didn't have anything else to do. This show made me angry, I felt very much like Alex from A Clockwork Orange must have felt after his treatment, like throwing up whenever I see this show. Unlike Alex, I also have the urge to graffiti "This sucks" all over various surfaces and to murder people (which he didn't want to do after the treatment cause he'd throw up if he did). Family comedies are my trigger. As I grow older, I also am growing far too cynical for these shows (Reba, 8 Simple (Stupid) Rules..., Greetings From Tuscon, etc., etc.) and for most comedy in general. Of course, I'm probably not their ideal demographic anyways, and I won't guess at that demographic as I may offend them, but in my opinion they rhyme with *blain-blead* and *blobotomized*. Anyhow, just to recap, this show sucks! They say that America is getting stupider as time progresses. It's nice to know we have a TV show to act as our mascot!

...Jonathan Jackson had it in him? I first saw a poster for this movie at the grocery store, and decided that I had to see it. I thought it was horror, but it was actually drama. Seth's dad suspects that his son may be a murderer, although he has trouble finding evidence to convince anyone else. Throughout the movie, we also become suspicious of him and the mysterious fire that killed Seth's mother. "Every family is a hierarchy ruled by its sickest member. The trick is figuring out who that is." The ending made me cry.

When I was a kid, I loved this show. It scared me all the time, and I probably lost a lot of sleep because of it, but it was worth it to see all of these stories told by regular kids. It sparked my love for horror. The absolute scariest episode for me was "The Night Shift" where vampires invade a hospital. I can still remember parts, and they still scare me. One of these days I'm going to start my own Midnight Society...in broad daylight...with soap operas...and cheese fondue. Pretty scary, huh?

Who hasn't heard the classic tale of jock meets wolf, jock gets bit by wolf and becomes a werewolf, jock meets goth, jock and goth become buds and encounter supernatural spookies? Still with me? That's pretty much the summary of Big Wolf on Campus, still one of the funniest shows ever. They spoofed on everything from telekinesis to witchy sororities, not to mention two Lost Boys spoofs with special guests Coreys Feldman and Haim. I especially liked the Muffy the Werewolf Slayer spoof. Other than overusing the word spoof, all that I have to say is that this was a really good show that was unfortunately cancelled because Fox Family changed to ABC Family and was taken over completely by Nazi Germany, I mean the Olsen twins. Bring back Big Wolf! Please? Pretty please??????

Every year our French class would watch this movie, not because it was especially good, but because it was tradition. There are so many bad parts in this movie: the French curse words, the leading lady, Vic, the title party where Vic and her boyfriend are slow dancing to that annoyingly haunting "Dreams Are My Reality" song while all of the other kids are practically moshing (in a French way, of course), that I really don't know why we insisted upon watching it. Of course, my senior year, some whiny underclassmen complained about part of the movie. I'm not real sure about this part because the TV would usually experience "technical difficulties," which pretty much meant the teacher adjusted the tracking so we couldn't see anything until the scene was over. Nevertheless, sometimes his timing was off, and I know I'll never look at popcorn the same way again! Long story short, it was declared as pornographic and never shown at my high school again, which was a real shame. (Darn Freshmen!)

I remember my cousins and I used to always watch these movies when I was a kid. I loved how these bad-playing, poor attitude-having kids could always be inspired to become champions, no matter how tough the odds and no matter how many times movies like this were remade with soccer, football, baseball, and dogs. Even though I've seen it a million times, I still get chills when the team works as a team and goes out to try their hardest. It's enough to make me, one of the least sporty people alive, want to join a sporting team. Another highlight, for me at least, were the guys. I always had at least one guy in the movie who I had a crush on and kept my undivided attention on. Who would've known back then that young Charlie (Joshua Jackson) would grow up to use big words and pretentious speeches on Dawson's Creek? Out of all those inspirational sports-are-good-for-kids movies, this was and always will be my favorite because it is the first one I can remember and the first I've ever seen. 1...2...3...Quack! Quack! Quack! Quack!

After seeing commercials for this movie, I thought it would be a light-hearted-Ocean's 11-Catch Me If You Can-type of movie. I soon learn that when the Mob is involved, nothing is light-hearted...or profanity-free. I lost count, but they may have broken Jay and Silent Bob's number of times the f-word was used. The movie was really not too bad, although it left me feeling depressed and disheartened. I especially liked the performance of Seth Green, who was the main reason I saw the movie in the first place. One thing that bothered me though was that whenever anyone got shot (which happened several times throughout the movie), they never just shot them once, they had to do it several times. I don't know, it just bothered me. If I had to rate it, I'd give it 2-and a-half stars out of four.

I recently saw this movie again, inspired by New Found Glory's remix of the main theme song. Technically, first I caught snippets of it (usually the ending) on TV several times and finally decided to borrow it from the library. I watched it with my little sister, and I immediately fell in love with the movie all over again. I remembered seeing it as a kid, but could not remember very much. Now, after experiencing it again, the luckdragon, the Nothing (which my sister was so kind to point out was not really nothing, but smoke), Atreyu (who now has a hard rock band named after him), the child-like emperess, and Bastian, our hero. I loved it from beginning to end, complete with bad animatronic animals and fake flying scenes, and hardly cared that my sister thought it was the stupidest thing she had ever seen. In my opinion, 5 stars out of 4.

...but in a good way! I loved this movie! The story of Will, a self-proclaimed "island" and his chance encounter with Marcus, an awkward outcast. It was genuinely funny and the relationship that grows between Will and Marcus serves as a lesson to us all. Another high point was the music by Badly Drawn Boy, especially the "Something to Talk About" video where the guy goes Jack Torrence over the duck. Brilliant!

Buffy the Vampire Slayer is a unique look inside the world of Buffy: Slayer of the Vam-pires. The entire series focuses on the struggle between one girl and her band of Scoobies versus otherworldly, often overwhelming demons, vamps, and millions of other nasties the Hellmouth spits out. If this seems too "X-Files-sci-fi" for some people, it is also a show about the girl's struggle to fit in in the often scarier "real world." In high school and college, it was being a loner, struggling to make the grades, and killing vamps on the side. Then as she got older, she eventually had to get a job and support her younger sister. Apocalypses seem small in comparison to some of the things she had to go through (Can you say Doublemeat Palace?). The show is witty and clever, never dim-witted and rarely off-color. It is, bluntly put, the only show of its kind, and in my opinion, the best show ever! I give it infinity times one million stars cubed plus five out of four.

The day before I watched the pilot of Miracles, I read an article in the local paper stating that the show had good writers behind it (from Angel), but that it did not show through in the pilot. They also stated that the pilot moved too slowly, and in order to catch on, viewers would have to be patient with it. I mildly considered this, but decided to form my own opinions. The show's commercials were awfully appealing, and the pilot was pretty good. (It was a little slow, but that can be expected when setting up the foundation for a series) I generally liked it and look forward to more episodes.

OK, so this movie will not make you any smarter and contains enough dirty jokes to make any decent human being blush, but it really is very funny. From the pot-smoking Cooper to straight-laced Josh(WHAT were they doing in those bushes?) and the eccentric people they find as possible suicide candidates. Cliff, the frightening frat guy, the paranoid guy who thinks that Bill Gates wants to steal his brain, and the dark British rocker who is pretty much not what he seems. You have to last at least once, even if you know that watching this movie lowers your IQ at least five points!

Roswell has been the epitome of good television. This is one of the few shows that combine so many different genres into one show and still make it work. The Roswell recipe is a unique combination of romance, teen angst and a dash of humor, but before becoming a clone of Dawson's Creek, is spiked with a full twist of good old-fashioned science fiction, and occasionally horror. Roswell has been my friend, my security blanket, my excitement, and much, much more. Since the very first episode, Roswell has made me laugh, smile, cry, scream, and generally kept me on pins and needles wondering what would happen the next week. I've heard that some people (they who must not be named) think that some Roswell plots are less than satisfactory. Well these few are entitled to their opinions, I think that the entire series began, progressed, and ?ended? perfectly. Sometimes I didn't like what happened either, but it usually turned out better if I watched the rest of the episode, and if the show really is over, if (fingers crossed) it gets picked up for another season, or if (knock on wood) they make a Roswell movie, Roswell is and always will be my favorite show. So, in closing, I would just like those of you out there to avoid black cats and ladders, and keep on the lookout for four-leaf clovers! Alien power!

A while ago, I decided that Boy Meets World was my favorite show, mainly because I thought that admitting Buffy was my favorite would make people think I was a psycho, but I was devastated when it was cancelled, after years of crying when Corey and Topanga broke up, laughing at the many funny moments caused by Eric and Shawn, and then crying again when they got back together. It did seem amazing that they seemed to be just about the only kids in any of their classes, but it was probably a small school. When they moved the show to the Disney Channel, I was very, very happy. Unfortunately, at the rate they play it, it can be easy to go on Boy Meets World overload, but every now and then, it's nice to revisit with old friends at John Adams High. And yes, I still cry when Corey and Topanga break and make up.