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Reviews
The Ipcress File (2022)
What's the point
Michael Caine's Harry palmer was something of a slick car salesman type but Joe Cole's is more car thief - seriously miscast, how could they get it so wrong. Lucy Boynton on the other hand looks perfect for the period, speaking of which, it is very difficult to replicate the scenes and ambiance of that time and I somehow feel they just missed the target. A bit like the Italian Job remake - utterly pointless.
Nightmare Alley (2021)
Do me a favour.
Just who are these people leaving such positive reviews - don't believe them!. Was asleep after fifty minutes . Like watching paint dry. Just another arty farty, self indulgent, waste of money.
Chloe (2022)
Who the hell writes this stuff
For those people who insist on watching this turgid BBC offering let me offer some advice - watch the first episode and then skip strait to the last, then a least you won't squander four hours of your life and still be just as wise as to what it's all about - just don't expect to much.
Around the World in 80 Days (2021)
Correctness abounds in eighty ways.
Poor Jules must be spinning in his Le Madelaine grave. Only the BBC can get away with state funded extortion to fund this vile, ludicrously inaccurate , obscenely PC, CGI fest. Shame on the actors and actresses that participated.
Bortført (2021)
Just when you thought TV drama couldn't get any worse!!
Oy Vey, where the Hell did Netflix dredge this dross from - how easily some people are pleased. I won't repeat what others have already said about the ridiculous plot and complete lack of acting skills, but believe me, every derogatory comment is justified. To cut the production some slack I did watch the dubbed version which made the whole thing even moor cheesy, mainly because Norwegian and Israeli characters all sounded as though they came straight from Essex - do me a favour.
The Lost Daughter (2021)
What the ****
I can not believe I have just made it all the way through this dreary pretentious drivel. Olivia Coleman 47, playing a 48 year old looking for all the world like a 68 year old who just happens to be a complete nutter. Washes up in some indeterminate seaside dump where everyone she encounters look like they are from the Village of the Damned. The place is then invaded by a crowd of low life seaborne travellers who apparently have something to do with the plot, blah blah blah, flashback, flashback, blah blah blah, The end.
The Tourist (2022)
Valiant attempt but must try harder.
This BBC attempt at a Fargo style production falls rather flat I'm afraid, but to be fair even Fargo lost it's appeal towards the latter series. It's not really funny, thrilling or cleverly written. As others have commented it's at least two hours to long and the ending is just plain lazy. Australia - OMG no wonder we sent all our villains there.
Sequestered (2014)
Best comedy on Netflix by far
Better than anything BBC or ITV can offer but still only one star. Second rate in all aspects - plot and acting beyond ridiculous. Four hours, seriously, as a ninety minute TV film it would be eighty nine minutes too long.
Spencer (2021)
Dreary drivel.
In the same way that Beyonce can't sing,( she simply shrieks in tune) pulling a bow across a violin strings is not music and getting a cat to walk the length of a piano keyboard is not music, yet that is what passes for a sound track to this dreary excuse for a film. So bad I could take no more and gave up after half an hour. As for the plot, really, who the hell is interested in the lives of ignorant, self entitled, privileged toffs.
You Don't Know Me (2021)
Bridgeton with shooters - a feel yu bro
I surprised my self by deciding to give this production a go and to be fair the first episode, despite being implausible, made me think that it could be something original and interesting, but oh my word the moment the second episode commenced it dropped off a cliff and didn't stop till it reached rock bottom. The main protagonist grew up on a sink estate and was supposed to be a street wise car salesman but instead he turned out to be a complete chump who made one stupid decision after another.
Stuck with it for the duration but by episode three I had one eye on the TV and the other on my Laptop. As expected, given the character portrayal, most of the dialogue was unintelligible Londaican. Another example of the BBC squandering my hard earned money by playing to the gallery.
Beckett (2021)
Netflix do it again
OMG Netflix are churning out some crap lately but this is up there at the top of the pile. If there were Oscars for ham acting this film would wipe the board. JD Washington ( never heard of him) plays the most useless clown ever, stumbling about like a five year old in his first egg & spoon race. Alicia Vikander is a good actress wasted in the movie - she new what she was doing with her swift exit. To be fair my wife and I spent most of the time rolling about with laughter so perhaps it could be rebranded a comedy.
Six Minutes to Midnight (2020)
Utter Tosh
Judy, Judy, Judy what were you thinking my dear. What on earth possessed you to take part in such utter tosh. Such a waste of a good cast apart from Mr Izzard who should really stick to what he does best, can't think what that is actually, but it certainly isn't acting. Barmy plot which seemed to have been made up as they went along and had no substance to it. The very end seemed to allude to the location having actually existed but I refuse to believe that the events portrayed did or could have taken place. If I had paid to watch this I would have asked for my money back.
The Pursuit of Love (2021)
Ludicrous waste of talent.
Amazing - The BBC have managed to pull it off again, that is to say, waste a shed load of tax payers money on yet another self indulgent, claptrap vanity project. It's a national scandal that I and others are forced by law to fund this wretched organisation. Sacrificed 45 minutes of my life before I gave up on this ludicrous waste of talent.
Jeremy Vine (2018)
What empty lives we must lead
A show which swings from quite entertaining, to wanting to throw a brick through your tv screen - but of course that is the express intent of the producers. Many of the panelists are rampantly left wing and all but a few have careers which precludes them from saying what they really feel about a topic. Before Wuhan it used to have a small live audience which appeared to be made up of homeless or 'care in the community' people.
There is a saying which goes 'It's an ill wind that blows nobody any good' and this most certainly applies to the sanctimonious, holier than thou Sarah Jarvis, a GP who was originally brought in to offer pandemic advice but has since become a permanent feature. She has managed to forge a completely new TV career, appearing on all channels. In addition to her long running radio job, book and blog writing, and also her position with Patient UK, it' a mystery to me how she finds time to do the job for which she was trained at huge public expense.
I wholly concur with another contributors comments on Jasmine Brown and Anne Diamond.
The Drowning (2021)
Should be a zero star option
Couldn't ever make it through the whole of the first episode, gave up ten minutes before the end. Aired on Ch5 who's strength lays in programmes about the Royal Family and shaven headed, tattooed, knuckle scrapers in fifty grand BMW's chasing villains, but not in great drama, so wasn't expecting much, but oh boy was this crap. Ludicrous and wholly implausible plot, etc, etc. It's all been said so won't repeat other reviews.
Tin Star (2017)
Just plain bonkers
First series of this show was really quite entertaining - original, quirky and somewhat off the wall. Series two much the same, but starting to wear a bit thin. Series three however, is just drivel. No plot to speak of, just Am Dram acting with people wandering the streets of Liverpool trying their level best to kill one an other. Somehow seeing people in the street with guns seems normal in America , probably because the place is awash with them but in Liverpool, I'm afraid not, the Police take quite a dim view of that sort of thing.
Producers take note - NO MORE PLEASE