kliuv1's Reviews

The Football Factory (2004)

10/10

22 April 2004

Bloody good fun, if you ask me. It's lovely to see Chelsea boys kicking the crap out of the rest of the football fans. The Millwall fight was done brilliantly and very believable. The main actor (Dyer) is a really cool guy, who fits perfectly well into this scene. Basically, a great movie for all the Chelsea fans. Hope it does well on video, and if you are interested in other football movies then you have to check English films "I.D.", "Firm" (with Oldman) and Italian "Ultra". Those films also tell the story of football hooliganism. It's a pity there are not enough films on this subject, cos you can make a great big budget action movie about football hooligans, but nobody seems to have the guts to do it.

By the way, this movie is becoming very popular in Russia with the rise in popularity of the Chelsea FC.

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One Man and His Dog (2004)

Another blatant SNATCH rip-off

16 March 2004

As if there weren't enough of those, we get another Guy Richie wannabe.

It's a pathetic sight. All the action is absent so all we get is street-wise, unfunny and riddled with swearing dialogue. You hardly understand half of it anyway, cos the different accents are so heavy. Anyhow, the actors did their best with this low budget rip-off, and the music was spot on. The rest of it is a waste of your time. Avoid.

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Tabloid (2001)

8/10

Nice one, mate!

23 January 2004

Warning: Spoilers

A nice thriller with a couple of interesting twists. For english people it will be especially interesting, cos it has a lot to say about modern English culture/ A synopsis and few spoilers ahead. A popular TV presenter gets into trouble when two gorgeous blond twins get murdered in his flat. The bodies dissapear, but the troubles are ahead for the ruthless, but professional TV presenter. A film worth watching, and John Hurt is brilliant as always.

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Beyond the Limits (2003)

3/10

nothing as I ever seen before

20 January 2004

This is some god forsaken piece of blood soaked, gory piece of cinema. Then again calling it a piece of cinema is going a bit too far. This is just a collection of (good) SFX shots of mangled bodies and people getting slashed in all manner of fashions. I love violence in movies, but this is really Beyond The Limits. I have no idea of what those mad Germans were thinking, but this is too much. A little recap of what you can see in the movie^ - heads getting cut off - women raped - legs, hands? fingers ripped off - people tortured in every possible manner and so on and so on. To be honest, if I would have red this earlier I would have loved to see the movie, but now I have to admit that I feel kind of dirty. I'll go and take a long shower and not sleep for a week. Always knew ze Germanz are into this sort of thing :-) P.S. Almost forgot, the acting is the worst I have seen in any movie in all my life!!!

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The Others (1997)

7/10

Very likable movie

5 December 2003

A charming little film, with quality actors (Rhys is superb) and very impressive dialogue. Perfect film for a quiet night in. Nothing outstanding, but very sweet and funny at times. The comedy element is a bit underused in the film, but it is clear that all the actors and the director have a lot going for them. Worth a look, if only in order to support quality independent filmmaking!

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The Big Finish (2000)

10/10

worth a look

23 October 2003

Warning: Spoilers

This is quite an intriguing film, cos it is shot with a handy-cam and costs about few hundred dollars. MINOR SPOILERS AHEAD. Two main characters decide to play a few pranks on the idiots that billed them. The pranks are all recorded on video and look very naturalistic. The confrontation gets out of control and the two kids start bumping off the bullies one by one with the hammer. There are quite a few things right about the film.

1) The acting is quite impressive and the main guy Gary has plenty of charisma. I hope he doesn't disappear from the screen.

2) The morality of the story is very relevant with all those Columbine shootings and so on. The movie brings up an important subject of how far a kid will go, before he snaps, and how guilty he is supposed to be in the end of the ordeal. 3) The whole feel of the movie is wonderful. It is much more believable than Blair Witch and much more entertaining. It really looks like the real documentary footage. 4) The dialogue is above the norm. Characters speak just like the real college guys, but with a lot of charm and wit. So, not for everybody, but worth a look.

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The Heroes (1994)

8/10

pretty good

26 September 2003

Nice movie about stealing loads jewelry from the store safe. Monica is as beautiful as ever, simply mesmerizing. Without her the movie wouldn't be worth watching. Anyway there are quite a fair amount of funny scenes and the social commentary about Italian poverty and unemployment is precise. Overall, a likable movie if you like your crime comedies on a light side. Nice ending :-)

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Toy Love (2002)

8/10

weird and wonderful

11 September 2003

Damn, that is one crazy love story. I' m not a fan of romcoms, but this movie had some pretty dark edges. All characters were so out of it, that they become mesmerizing. You never know what they are going to do next. It is not your typical love story that's for sure. It's a good way to be recognizable for New Zealand film community when you have no money and no stars. All you have to do is turn a typical love story into a blackest relationship comedy without the blood or gore. Well-done guys! The film is not only watchable, but it is highly amusing. The only problem with this film that had was the fact that i hated every single character in it. They all behaved like some crazy weirdoes, who never know what they want. On the other hand, probably, there lies the charm of the movie. Where have you seen a romantic comedy where all characters are annoying bunch of dummies?

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Sol Goode (2003)

10/10

Bloody good fun!

22 August 2003

I wasn't expecting much from this movie, but I was very wrong. Although I love Getty, Kennedy and Jared Leto, I wasn't hoping for such a gem. The acting was spot on; the characters were believable and warm. All these actors were crying out for a movie like this. OK, more to the point. Although it had some romantic themes it was hilarious from start to finish. The jokes were coming thick and fast, and fortunately they were not all primitive American below the belt stuff. The dialogue was fast and snappy, with brilliant jokes. I urge you to see the film either with your friends and some beer, or with your other half with popcorn. You will enjoy it for sure. Finally it's nice that these quality actors got the script they deserve. Hopefully, we will now see more of them on the screen.

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Fear X (2003)

1/10

My god, what an awful movie.

19 August 2003

Damn, I was looking forward to seeing this movie so much that the dissapointment is too hard to take. The director wanted to make an art-house thriller with suspence, but ended up with pretentious excuse for a movie. The plot is non-existent and nothing at all happens in the film. John Turturro is sulky and boring in a thankless role. There are no shocks to be had, and people who are calling it horror of a new kind are very wrong indeed. To put it bluntly the film is awfully boring and pretentious. The director is trying to imitate Lynch at times, but he fails miserably. Lets all hope that he will learn from this mistake.

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Bloody Mallory (2002)

6/10

They didn't try hard enough

14 August 2003

Just saw this movie at the Russian premiere and was a bit disappointed. I was expected to get a real trash b-movie comedy, but the comedy element was underused. It was voiced by famous Russian presenters which was kind of funny in places, but again that was not really what the director's achievement. The premise was simple enough and they could have used more gore and blood for my liking. Not enough monsters, but my main point is that they didn't make a good use of the music. This movie is crying out for a loud rock soundtrack, but the director, probably, decided to save some extra cash, which is a pity.

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Party Monster (2003)

7/10

Worth a look

11 July 2003

Well, it is one strange movie. It was nice to see these actors in a story like that, but there are some flaws. Caulkin can't act to save his life, but it is nice to see him working again, especially in such a brave role. The real revelation in this movie is Seth Green. I always knew he was a promissing actor, but here he rises above expectations. Great comedic turn. The moment where Caulkin puts on the music and forces Green to dance is hillarious. Marilyn Manson is quite amusing as well. Basically if you are into drug independent american cinema, this might be your cup of tea. Could have been much much worse.

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Lost and Delirious (2001)

1/10

what an auwful banal film

10 July 2003

God help the people that made this primitive, fake, sentimental film. I did not believe in any of the cardboard characters. All the sentimental moments felt really fake. One moment the girls are running like headless chickens, and the next they start crying and telling each other how they hate their parents. If you want a great movie about young girls in love watch "F***ing mal" or "Show Me Love". This is a European film that deals with the same problems, but without banal symbolism and primitive screenplay.

By the way, with this heavy-handed symbolism the director might think that all viewers are simple morons, cos a girl with emotional problems and her hawk that can't fly is just plain silly. And while we are on the subject I didn't feel in any way sorry for the main character, because mental illness should be cured in the hospital, and people like that should be locked away, so as not to harm any of the people around them.

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Good Bye Lenin! (2003)

10/10

A wonderful gem of a movie

3 July 2003

A brilliant tragic comedy. For the past decade Germany was not the most prolific filmmaking country, but this movie is one of their triumphs. For me this movie was especially relevant, cos I lived in Russia at that time and remember all the atrocities of the old regime. The feel of that time is done brilliantly in this movie. Again it seems that only Europe can make sentimental films, that are not primitive and do not look like commercial tearjerkers that Americans seem to put out every week or so. If you have a chance, see this movie, cos it is a refreshing look at one the most troubled times for the soviet era. Russian actress Chulpan Hamatova is as beautiful as ever.

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My Little Eye (2002)

nice but no cigar

17 April 2003

Warning: Spoilers

I was expecting so much from the film. It was supposed to be absolutely wicked. Great reviews, no famous actors, great idea and independent production. It turned out to be OK, but not much more.

The good points: actors are quite adequate, great idea, shot in an interesting style with quite a few nervy moments. The bad points: the plot seemed to have too many holes.

The spoilers alert!! Why would 5 stranger get into the house waiting to receive 1 million $ if they don't know how it works? They never met any of the makers and they don't even know the site. How are we to believe the plot of this game if we don't even know the rules? Do the parents and friends of these guys and girls know about this experiment? The other thing is why did that guy started killing others of? If we are to believe that bets are being placed on the one who survives then it is a bit unfare that one guy knows the rules and strats killing all the others. Again he might have done it sooner, like on the second day. The arrival of Chris who had sex with Charlie is unexplained as well. It could have been such a wonderful movie, but in the end they have made a good horror thriller. Still, better than the rest of the crap in the cinema nowdays :-))

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The Hunted (2003)

1/10

Worst movie of the year so far

11 April 2003

I saw this movie with my friends at the cinema and we couldn't stop laughing. The script is non-existent. Benicio and Tommy sleepwalk through their roles, other actors don't look like professional actors at all. A child could have written the plot and the dialogue. It is impossible to explain how Tommy Lee Jones character seems to find Benicio anywhere he goes and it just looks ridiculous. The amount of primitive stereotypes used in this movie is astounding. The whole plot is just the same as in the first Rambo, but that one was at least original in a way. This is just an idiotic ploy to sell the viewers a pointless and totally unremarkable excuse for a movie. At the cinema we were guessing all the lines the cardboard characters would say to each other. Worst of the Hollywood machine. Don't watch, cos watching the paint dry would be more satisfying. But all that is directed at people who enjoy watching good movies. If you are not one of them, then go ahead.

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Yady, ili vsemirnaya istoriya otravleniy (2001)

7/10

A nice little movie about poisons and famous people being poisoned in the history of the world

4 January 2002

Nice little movie about poisons and famous people being poisoned in the history of the world. It is quite funny at times and entertaining. It mixes our present time and the unfortunate relationship of one couple with historical flashbacks to the famous people poisoned by their siblings and rivals. I would recommend it to people who are looking for something a bit different from their cinema experience.

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