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Clerks III (2022)
4/10
Kevin Smith wasn't even supposed to be here
8 August 2023
A film that doesn't stand on its own legs but makes sense (not much) only viewed through the lens of the previous two episodes.

Some dialogues are unbearably exaggerated and have nothing of the inspiration of those of the original film (the surgeon in obnoxious) with continuous and insistent pop references to star wars and superheroes as if we were in the worst episode of Big Bang Theory.

Completely distorted Silent Bob is no longer an impassive and stoic counterpart to the outlandish Jay, but is now a clown who shows off an infinite series of unbearable face expressions. It seems like Kevin Smith misunderstood his own character.

This film's only bitter pleasure is seeing old characters repeat old scenes, but it would be more suited to a little nostalgic sketch on the Tonight Show than a full-length feature film.

However, it makes a certain impression to see old Dante, Randal and Jay who, however, make the same faces, the same expressions, dressed as 90s kids but with the body of an old man.

There is nothing in this installment other than a few moments of nostalgic fan service and maybe it would be appropriate to say to Kevin Smith "you weren't even supposed to be here today".

Score: 37 (out of 100)
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Blood & Gold (2023)
5/10
Cartoonish
28 May 2023
The baddies are ultra-evil over simplified monodimensional cartoonish nazis. The lead has no charisma. Dialogue is very basic. Story is not very interesting. Action is meh. You can see that it tries to imitate Tarantino but it's definitely a failure. A very forgettable movie with little redeeming qualities.

The baddies are ultra-evil over simplified monodimensional cartoonish nazis. The lead has no charisma. Dialogue is very basic. Story is not very interesting. Action is meh. You can see that it tries to imitate Tarantino but it's definitely a failure. A very forgettable movie with little redeeming qualities.
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Ted Lasso (2020–2023)
1/10
Could not get past episode 2 - We are living idiocracy
26 May 2023
The thumbnail is not inviting. There's a dumb-faced guy who makes me fear that humour will all be based on his dumbness.

To my surprise, the humor is all about his dumbness, but not only. Everyone behaves like an idiot.

The dialogues are unnatural and corny, there isn't a joke that makes you laugh, the humor, if you can call it that, is unbearable.

An example? "How do you see the game versus Crystal Palace?" "Well a palace made of crystal seems fragile" Ha ha ha ha, I am serious. This is the humour that got this series a 8.7 rating.

Other typical jokes include:
  • mentions of testicles and masturbation
  • mentions that the same thing is called differently in USA and UK
  • generally weird behaviour without purpose or payoff


If you find that to be humour, this is your show.

Shame, because the premise of an American football manager coaching an English soccer team was interesting, but whoever wrote these dialogues is the kind of guy who will tells you a joke and then explains it to you.

The fact that this cringfest is a beloved award winning show, is the closest experience I had to live in an Idiocracy movie. I am like the normal guy who says "how can you like this??" and the crowds go "shut up ahahahaahah! Su funny!!"
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Warning (II) (2021)
10/10
This is a mashup of short Black Mirror-style stories
19 May 2023
This is a mashup of short Black Mirror-style stories. Yes OF COURSE they are disjointed. I have no diea how this title has a 4/10, are people stupid?

There are horrible boring woke movies with ratings above 7 that I can't stand for more than 20 minutes, and this one which is a collection of independent stories which are absolutely on par with Black Mirror episodes gets a freaking 4????

This does not make a lot of sense. Maybe people didnt understnad the stories were all independent and kept waiting for a connection between all of them?

I gave it a 10 just because the rating is too low, but the real score would be AT LEAST a solid 7.

Please reate this movie higher cause it deserves it.
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1/10
A 90 minute Tik Tok video
10 April 2023
Screenplay is clumsy and pacing all over the place, acting is below amateurish. More than a movie, it looks like a collection of low quality Tik Tok videos, kept together by 80s and 90s random references. Lillo is irritating from beginning to end, humour is dumb and falls flat. It's a shame cause I really wanted to like this movie even if I knew it was a B-movie. The idea could have been interesting but the way YouNuts! Put it in place is a disaster. This movie is unfortunately as bad as their previous films. I managed to reach the end only because I am a fan of the genre, everyone else will stop watching after 20 minutes wondering "what is this mess, eww". YouNutes, if you read this review please stop making movies.
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