Change Your Image
innerwar
Reviews
Le pacte des loups (2001)
hmmmmmmmm
I'm having an awful time reviewing this, but i felt i had to eventually. Im absolutely 100% in love with the concept, and mostly the execution is good and proper, but there are some incredibly amateurish handywork involved right next to the brilliant stuff that manages to give it all an aura of awesome mediocrity.
Most of this movie has been covered by other reviews; Yes its overly long, yes it has some decidedly cheesy characters, and yes the kung fu is out of place, yes the beast looks less cool than it should have. Where this film succeeds however, is in the boyish, childish glee it presents its subject matter. The biggest problem for me was the fight scenes. Directly inspired by the video game Soul calibur, these could have been great hadnt it been for the ridiculously poor editing and liberal use of slow motion to detract from their authenticity. As one character falls back, i count 4 different camera angles rapidly flicking in and out. it gives the fighting an ethereal unreal and chaotic appearance that simply make them confusing and unpleasant to watch.
If the editing hadnt been so bad, this movie would have been tolerable, even in spite of its length, but as is, the film BORDERS on goodness, but ends up being rather annoying and pretentious.
Batoru rowaiaru (2000)
Very impressive, and very entertaining
I'll start right off saying i got this movie because i'm not only a huge fan of japanese cinema, but im also particularly interested in b-movies and complete turkeys. Japan has churned out some of the strangest films i have ever seen, and also some of the worst, and when i heard of the films basic plotline i thought it would be a terriffic exploitation flick. I mean come on, 20+ japanese schoolgirls with guns? However upon viewing, Battle Royale destroyed all my expectations one by the other. Believe it or not, this film, easily misinterpreted as a gory teen slasher action movie, is actually a very very good film with stunning production values and a script that works on multiple levels.
Directed by experienced director Kinji Fukasaku, who has actually been in the business for over 40 years, Battle Royale is the story of an alternate Japan, where unemployment is as high as 15%, and disillusioned teens drop out of school like their faith in the system. As a last resort to remotivate the masses, the government passes the Millennium education reform bill, or the Battle Royale act, which dictates that every year a ninth grade highschool class is picked out by random lottery, and shipped off to an island where they will fight til the last man. Only one is allowed to return home, not as a victor, but as an example of how far the government is willing to go unless the kids shape up and save their country from 'becoming no good'. The film centers on disturbed orphan Shuya and his class, and begins with a scene where they are all bused out to a supposed field trip. I don't know, but i could identify very well with the portrayal of a high school class. In fact i felt certain flashbacks from my own ninth grade school trip to poland, as the class had some very similar characters to my own. I suppose this made the film seem stronger to me, but the point is; this class could be any high school class out there. The kids play their parts brilliantly, making the stark contrast as theyre gassed and shipped to the island so much harder. This is no hollywood flick where they make 25 year olds play 15 year olds. These actors actually are around 16, something you wouldnt believe from their performances, which range from good to stunning. The kids come to in a derelict classroom on said island, surrounded by armed soldiers with little compassion for these spoiled teens. Soon they are greeted by their 7th grade teacher, played intolerably well by Takeshi "Beat" Kitano (known from several action movies), who makes it brutally clear that this is no ordinary field trip. Kitano plays just like my old school teacher, blended seamlessly with a form of sadistic glee thats both terrifying and darkly humorous. "Lets watch a video" he says, having a tv wheeled in. Onscreen is a fantastically japanese cheerleader type explaining the rules of the game to the baffled students. In three days, there must only be one left. If anyone tries to escape, their motion tracking necklace will explode. If anyone travels into randomly changing danger zones, or lingers too long in one area, their necklace will explode. If there is more than one left at the end of day three, their necklaces will explode. The gruesome function of this necklace is demonstrated as a student refuses to conform. One down, forty to go. One by one the students are sent out into the field, carrying their personal belongings as well as a randomly selected bag of tools, including a compass, a map, food and water and a random "lucky weapon", ranging from submachineguns to lids and binoculars. And so the game is on.
What Battle Royale manages to pull off is give almost all of the school kids a certain depth of character. Shallow perhaps, but you always care when one of them bites the dust. Shuya and his father who committed suicide, Noriko the class outcast, The fat kid, the nerd, all the typical class stereotypes are represented. There is quite a complex web of relationships Fukusaku manages to weave amid all the carnage, and it never seems out of place or contrived. All this serves to give the fierceness of the competition and the uniform blackness of the storyline more strength. As the tagline says, "could you kill your best friend?". While the story mostly concentrates on the absurdity of having to destroy people you love to get ahead in life, and the kids are usually good kids made to do awful things, the plot also lets a good couple of proper villains come out of all the despair, starting off with a severely psychotic girl and a "transfer student" who it turns out signed up for fun.
Seen from a simple action exploitation movie point of view, this is also top notch fare, with a wide range of weaponry available to facilitate the carnage, of which there is a lot of. This film has reached notoriety because of its violence, and while there wasnt anything that really disturbed me (ive seen worse than this in hollywood flicks since the 70s), the fact that there is a coherent, strangely realistic storyline centering on actual young teens in the framework makes it all so much more intense. These kids are everyday kids put in a completely insane situation, and while the situation is crazy, the kids play out like real kids. The only scenes that bothered me were scenes involving the girl villain, as she is the kind of evil you would find beating up new kids at school, given weapons and the will to kill. The transfer student character wanders the island like some kind of demon, killing brutally without a word. However in terms of horror, none of the violence, like the infamous groin stabbing, comes close to scenes where terrified girls are forced to kill their school crush, when couples commit suicide to escape the game, or when tightly knit friendships untangle over paranoia. The strength of the film lies in the writing and dialogue, and while the translation is, as always, fairly average, the Tartan video release manages to convey a lot of the same strength of language as the original language. One scene seems to be uniformly misunderstood by reviewers, maybe because of bad translation, but mostly because they are unfamiliar with the general uptightness of japanese culture. When a couple who have been in love since god knows when are trying to confess their feelings for one another as one of them is dying, and all they manage to say is "you're the coolest guy in school", this struck me as very sad. Even with their last breath they are unable to say it. Made me think about taking chances while you still can.
Battle Royale is a very intimidating film to review, because it works on so many levels. As social commentary on the competitive nature of the japanese educational system (fyi. in japan, ninth grade is the last grade where further education is no longer guaranteed, and you have to work mad hard to get good education from there), as action film, as black comedy, as psychological horror, BR gets it all right. Brilliant photography, a strong soundtrack and unintrusive editing (something ive been obsessed with since Brotherhood of the wolves), coupled with the brilliant acting and strength of production values make Battle Royale an absolute must see, regardless. Its provocative and entertaining, and although the ending seems slightly tacked on, it manages to remain fresh and maintain a solid pace from beginning to end, despite its many flashbacks. This is oldschool japanese cinematography done the newschool way. Fukusaku knows how.
The Faculty (1998)
Pretty bad, pretty entertaining
Its a fairly hard movie to rate, because it doesnt take itself very seriously, and it doesnt only rip off a lot of classics, it flaunts the fact that it does, it brings out the big guns and parade it around on screen wearing a pink tutu. Anyone who has ever seen The Thing will be having a field day remembering scenes. The Faculty has dialogue, scenes, images and designs stripped directly from Carpenter's vision, and proves that modern cgi has a long way to go to better what old bearded men with mirrors, rubber, scrap metal and pulleys did 20 years ago. The tentacle head scene springs to mind; This effect looks cheap compared to the original.
The faculty tries to replicate a bit of the paranoid tension from The Thing, but mostly fails on account of its hackneyed dialogue. Characters that initially seem well developed turn into mindless action movie robots devoid of personality. How they turn from sensible typical highschool teenagers into rampant bladewielding head-shooting killers and then back again is beyond me, and i suspect this is more due to Rodriguez' comic book style direction than the script. Rodriguez likes things that go boom, and if possible, also bang and Zzap. He makes movies where characters invariably shout "lets go!" before vacating an area, and the good guy always gets the girl, no matter what a superficial bitch of a monstrous slutty whore she is. Its uncanny. The faculty's version of the Thing's blood test scene was actually potentially great, as they all have to do drugs to see who's who, with one girl severely allergic. You see characters cracking up madly while there's still tension as to who is human. The problem however, is that there is no underlying hint that one of them actually isnt human, you start off thinking they're all normal, which destroys about 50% of the hypothetical paranoia, and when the test actually reveals an alien, the effect is undramatic in the extreme. The character sneezes! Generally speaking however, The Faculty is actually quite good entertainment, with a lot more creativity than your average slasher. The biggest problem for me was the whole "if we kill the mother alien everyone will turn normal" theory, which absolutely makes no sense whatsoever, and i couldnt see why there would be any connection between the slugs whatsoever. They seemed pretty self sufficient to me. Whats the point of a self replicating species capable of taking over people quite easily if all it takes to destroy a civilisation, no matter how big, is to wack one of them. What kind of obscenely illogical species would that be? I take it on the alien homeworld there was just one original alien that never died of age or anything at all while all its offspring went off selfreplicating infinitely with no regard for lack of breathin space. Its quite odd how little regard is paid to logics, but then again this *is* a b-movie monster flick. I just wish it didnt try to be smart so often. Another thing i dont understand is the beginning where the movie freezes on certain characters and puts their name onscreen. I take it this is to familiarize viewers with the characters and make them more compelling somehow, sort of how The Warriors begins with introducing all the gang members personalities. However the faculty names characters that are of little or no consequence to the film, a couple of whom you basically never see again.
If you want cheap thrills, decent effects work, some great evil bad guys and a fairly good monster battle, have a look-see. If you want something brainy, dont bother. 7 out of 10.
Jungle de Ikou (1997)
Hilariously inappropriate anime
I'll heartily recommend this for fans of off-the-wall anime in the school of Jungle wa itsumo hale nochi guu, Captain tsubasa, Super gals kotobuki ran and Sexy commando sugoiyu. The plot centers on a 12 year old girl given the power to change into a massively chested fertility goddess by performing a "sexy dance" (how she learns this is one of the funniest scenes ive ever seen), and her subsequent use of this 'power' to save the world from a demon. The film never skips a chance to show off her panties for some reason, and there is so much juvenile sexual innuendo scattered throughout the three episodes it had me shaking my head and grinning madly in disbelief. This is quite a strange little collection of ideas they put in motion. Essentially the movie is about gigantic breasts and showing them off in the most ludicrous contexts imaginable, such as surfing on a flying whale or squished against the canopy of an F15 fighter.
If you take this for what it is; Slapstick comedy with a slightly oversexed but entirely benevolent heart, youll find it to be quite an entertaining and lovable flick. I know it had me in stitches at certain points. Seven out of ten! :)
Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999)
Deeply, deeply disappointing
*massive spoilers*
The media hubbub around this movie was fairly intense here in norway as in any country i guess. The demand was so high that the movie actually ran 24 hours a day for the first few days after the premiere. I saw it at 5am at the best theatre in Oslo with a friend, and i was so excited i didnt really know what to do with myself.
The past couple of days i'd seen people in star wars getups in ticket lines and people in sleeping bags outside theatres and the like, and i feel so incredibly bad for those people who went through all that trouble for a movie this insignificant.
It doesnt add anything to the star wars mythos; It repeats stuff we knew from IV-VI, so it just basically sets the stage for episode 2, and in the process manages to make every single character entirely uninteresting in the process. In fact there isnt much incentive in me to see episode 2 now, particularly not with that hideous name they put on it. That name actually made me angry to the point of loud swearing. I thought they could rectify this atrocity somehow with a darker more serious and thorough second episode, and they ¤#)(¤("% called it attack of the clones. Yay George Lucas.
Star Wars episode 1 makes little or no sense. For some reason the "trade federation" (a totally faceless group of asian-themed villains. Dubious element #1) are being naughty and have decided to set up a blockade (which doesnt seem to be doing anything at all) to bother the planet of Naboo for no reason. A couple of bumbling jedi more content with spinning around as many times as possible while fighting (excrutiating to watch, particularly when coupled endlessly with the same old star wars theme ad nauseum) than with being err. living breathign characters perhaps, arrive to "settle things". Some stuff explodes and they have to spin at least 19 times and remain entirely devoid of emotions to escape. George Lucas tries to keep the pace of the film up by having them say "lets split up and get on some o these here ships and meet up on the planet" before leaving them, leaving the actual process of escape up to the viewers imagination. Cue Jar Jar Binks, an idiot combination of donald duck, any african american racist stereotype and a jamaican. He bumbles around the forest like its been his job for exactly 3 minutes and he's still working out how things function, falls over a lot and gets saved by the magically appearing old-guy jedi. The young jedi magically appears (or he teleports in or whatever, ive seen the film a couple of times an this still eludes me) and they have an annoyingly up-close conversation with the fishman, delivering some of the flattest lines in recent memory (You should say "That is the sound of a *THOUSAND* terrible things coming this way" god damnit. Emphasis on thousand! THOUSANDNDDHDDH!!) before plunking into a pond which, through the magic of filmmaking, turns into a frickin ocean all of a sudden. They hook up with some frogs that seem less racist but still disturbingly human (the original SW series had aliens that were simply alien, not human parodies) and take off in a weird sub to dodge some big fish before plopping out of the water in ancient greece or something. Im not sure what happens next, but through interacting with what looks like toy soldiers and an entirely wooden natalie portman the jedi and the frog-negro somehow manage to fly off in a huge silver vibrator.
Some more stuff happens, i guess it was the stabilisers, theres always the stabilisers in this kind of film, and the crew has to land at Ooo AAa desert planet Tatooine for spare parts. This is where ye allmighty Darth Vader shows up, in the form of annoying playmo-man brat Anakin Skywalker. He talks and moves like that kid in AI before he was programmed. In fact its surprising this robot of a child didnt bump into more things and fall over more during his scenes, altho i can only imagine what happened offscreen. His mother doesnt know WHATS going on, altho she's apparently a slave to this fat blue flying arab, altho we never see the lazy old hag do any actual work around the place. Looks like slavery is a decent gig to me. The kid is also "a slave" *chuckle* and somehow, probably through magic, manages to build a racing pod and a protocol droid. Some more insignificant stuff happens and the kid flies around a bit, everyone goofs around some more and talks inconsequential crap and the "bad guy" of the movie is introduced. Darth Maul aka Ray Parkes is probably one of the movie's only elements of identity. Although he looks like a clown who hasnt really caught onto things yet he portrays the character with just seething hate and intensity. Jolly good show! Eventually the kid has to race that pod thing, and this scene is actually pretty good. Probably because theres less dialogue in it than any given minute of the film otherwise, thank god. Of course the kid wins. Even tho he was like one lap behind, suure. Its magic i tell you, magic. Then after he wins one of the jedi (the old one) develops a kind of "thing" for the kid because he can feel something about him (this SCARES me) and they take off, but not until the bad guy can join the club and magically appear on his scooter, do 4 flips and fall over while trying to bother the old jedi. After the old guy hops onto the ship again, having just been through all kinds of danger fighting this hellish *demon* jedi, he seems entirely unaffected. "What was that?" "I dont know, but it was well versed in the ways of the jedi. Come friend, let us go masturbate furiously" what the hell? the thingie SPUN AROUND and FELL OVER! if thats what defines a jedi i must be more powerful than i thought! Now they go back to naboo, some girl that apparently was there throughout the film turns out to be the queen (still made from wood) and the trade fed starts being angry and theres apparently some kind of fighting going on. A whole heap of those fish guys fall over over and over again and somehow manages to damage some comical enemy robots that stutter and dont kill anything but say "hands up" instead. Hmm what happens next.. Oh theres some "political stuff" inbetween here but its all just showcasing the effects for Coruscant and noone makes any sense and the queen keeps talking like DecTalk.exe so youre not missing out on anything. After some more fighting the GOD DAMN KID ACCIDENTALLY FLIES A SHIP TO THE ENEMY MOTHERSHIP AND ACCIDENTALLY BLOWS IT UP GOD DAMNIT! How could they DO this! Its an *INSULT* to all of us! "I'll try spinning! THATS A GOOD TRICK!" What happened to pilot legends like Wedge Antilles or whatever it is his last name is, isnt it down to skill anymore? No its down to ACCIDENT! In fact i think the whole propulsion of this film is based on accident. I have no doubt that the plot is simply idea after idea connected by hastily crafted strands of text. Its like "Oh yeah and well have like frog guys huh hhuhuh yeah theyll be like REAL funny, and like they live in the wa.. err George what was that idea again? Oh yeah dude thatll work great, its like a jungle planet we'll just put lots of water on it itll be like uhh yeah like a 'careful balance' and stuff y'know and theyll be enemies with the humans cos itll be like afric.. HEY DUDES, LETS MAKE THE FISHMEN LIKE BLACK PEOPLE ITLL LIKE SYMBOLISE THEIR STRUGGLE AND STUFF! Yeah thats a GREAT idea huhuh" Its an absolute disgrace.
After that big donut blows up the movie basically ends. No wait theres this duel somewhere, im not sure, but its got Ray Parks and the 2 jedi totally flipping out trying to kill eachother. They spin over and over and over and over and over, and the music is SO dramatic. Can you tell im fed up with talking about this flick yet? Anyway the dark jedi magically becomes an idiot at just the right time for the good monkey ninjas to cut him in half. Did i say ninja? I meant jedi! With all this flipping out and killing stuff you never know the difference anymore. Well no more darth maul and no more interesting character. How dull. After this theres some people dying and some people celebrating, and thats basically the film.
I can guarantee you this review was more entertaining than watching the actual film.
2 thumbs up for effects, 2 thumbs down for actual filmmaking. Boo!