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The Walking Dead: World Beyond (2020)
"It doesn't get better"
I was going to write a clever review on the series....however, sad to say, there is absolutely nothing 'clever' about this series. Nothing clever, nothing innovative, nothing creative or even redeeming. The first show was dreadful and it went staggering off downhill from there.
Forbidden History: The Curse of Hitler's Executioner (2017)
A complete mishmash of wrong information
Let's start with the fact that Reichhart didn't invent the Fallbeil in any of it's forms, the first German steel Fallbeil was designed by Johann Mannhardt in 1853, and was used exclusively by the German government until 1936. In 1936 another design was introduced in order to simplify manufacture and to have a machine that was short enough to fit into rooms in the prisons. The twenty (20) machines manufactured under orders from the Justice Department were built at the Tegel Prison workshops. These machines were never equipped with sliding tables.
One of the most irritating parts of this show is when they depict the 'executioner' or whoever he is looking at his watch and holding up a finger like he's starting a bicycle race.....in the three (3) seconds it would take to be executed by Reichhart, there wouldn't even be time to look at the watch. The convicted was laid on the table and slid forward, the lunette and the blade were released almost simultaneously. Nobody had time to lie there and contemplate the act that got them there.....
Of course most of the photos of Guillotines in this show are also French machines. I guess I had hope that since this show was about the German executioner it would actually show German machines.
Also Reichhart didn't "throw his Fallbeil into the river out of shame". I believe that the Fallbeil that went in the river was the machine at Pankrác prison in Prague.
I know this is all played for effect but it would be nice if people knew that after watching this episode that it didn't really provide much insight into Reichhart's persona.
Under the Skin (2013)
Walked out on this one.......and it was a rental video.
This started out bad, and got worse. It was the most disjointed, sophomoric, self-indulgent piece of film making I've seen in years. I said that I walked out on it, that's true, my wife had rented this so we'd have something to watch during the Corona outbreak. The thing was so boring that I'm sure that Warhol's 'Sleep' had more exciting moments. I mean, who wouldn't like to waste 5 and a half hours (roughly) watching someone sleeping. Listen, if you liked this movie good for you it shows that you are easily entertained....and I would like to recommend Warhol's movie as your next viewing choice.
If anyone could detect a plot anywhere in this movie, you could probably find one in your local phone directory.
The Chinese Ring (1947)
Classic Charlie Chan....almost.
As Charlie Chan, Roland Winters seems to be struggling to get a handle on the character. His delivery of the Pidgin English seems really forced, even more so when most the Chinese actors in the movie speak English fluently.
As others on here have said, this movie is basically a cookie cutter version of "Mr. Wong in Chinatown", a better movie, in my opinion. All in all it's an OK Charlie Chan movie. It doesn't compare well with some of the early Chan movies.....but it's still Charlie Chan and therefore definitely worth watching.
Black Summer (2019)
Self preservation....what's that?
From the beginning I really wanted to like this series, however as with most shows where people were called upon to protect themselves and others....it was not to be. Self preservation is a very strong motivator....except in this show. It seems as though the kids in the school 'get it' while the majority of adults (and I use that term lightly) stumble around clueless, while being chased by Olympic level Zombies.
The chapter 'Alone' really depicted it best. They took all of the lack of awareness of all of the various survivors and distilled it down into one person. This was truly someone who deserved to die. He was in numerous places where he could have armed himself, yet didn't pick up so much as a toothpick. He also had no concept of stealth and almost zero situational awareness.
If there were ever a 'Zombie Apocalypse' this show would serve as a catalog of people to avoid at all costs.
I will watch it to the end....with trepidation.
Perhaps if the writers were required to spend a few days in a border town, the sense of preservation would increase in the characters they write.
Zombie Night (2003)
Bad, Really, Really, Really Bad..............
It seems as though they tried to make up for the fact that they had no plot, by distracting us with grade school level acting, and floppy naked breasts. The characters are all very 2 dimensional, and eminently forgettable, mercifully.
The men (and I use that term very lightly) in this movie are some of the stupidest and inept people to ever attempt to survive a zombie apocalypse.
They are very concerned about 'saving' everybody..even the lowlife who rips them off, gets them killed and in fact actually just kills one of them outright. The best example of this is at the end, when he was getting what he had been working towards for the entire movie, one of the character actually says "Do you think we're doing the right thing, maybe he's just sick and needs help".....are you kidding me? This guy needed to be terminated in the first few minutes that he appears in the group, but instead we get this attitude through the entire film of 'Gee, maybe he's just misunderstood'.......LOL..
Pack your survival group full of fools with overwhelming guilt complexes, and a desire to 'do good' even if it destroys the entire group and you may as well just run out and feed yourself to the zombies. After all, some of them were probably 'good' people too.
This movie should probably be called 'How to Die in a Zombie Apocalypse'.
Fear the Walking Dead (2015)
Dead on it's feet....
Now that I've watched all three of the episodes that are out so far, I have to say that unless something starts to change radically in the next couple of episodes I won't be watching any of the others. The slow build up of the infection, especially when we've seen how quickly people can change, is making the beginning of this series a real snoozer.
The characters are completely unlikeable, and I was rooting for the zombies within minutes of seeing these people appear. The father is pathetic, a walking meal. The wife seems a bit less clueless, but the acting skills of this person only allow for two or three expressions...which are to cover her entire range of emotions. The junkie son should have been done in before the show even starts, but somehow manages to survive, although hearing him whining about scoring some drugs would insure him a spot on the nearest street corner, where he could just take his chances. The only person, so far, that seems to have his act together is the Hispanic barber...although I believe that he's also in for a rude awakening.
All things considered, if you wanted to die in a zombie apocalypse, these would be the people to hook up with.
Zombie Night (2013)
Not the worst zombie movie ever.....but really close!
I would first like to say, that the comprehension skills of the individuals depicted in this movie rank right up there with a snail...in fact, a snail would probably catch on quicker. The main protagonist hits a man with his car, but when he gets out to check him, the injured guy attacks one of the girls in the car...she screams for 15 seconds or so, yet when the driver turns to look it's as though this is the first time he's seen her...is he deaf? The few cops that you see in the movie are so un-cop-like that they are more like parodies than actual police. You couldn't possibly be that stupid, and live as long as they have. Wooden acting by the 'stars' of this movie simply enhance the trite foolishness of the entire film...but the crowning jewel is still the staggeringly mindless inability of the people in the movie to comprehend any of the events going on around them. The events in this movie take place, I assume, sometime in this century and one would imagine that somebody in this film would have seen a zombie movie...they've been making them for 40+ years...after all how long would it take you to figure out what was going on?
Revolution (2012)
Intellectual black hole...
I had hopes for this show as I enjoy the post apocalypse genre....however, after viewing two episodes of this pathetic waste of time and money I have decided that this is, without a doubt, filled with some of the most unbelievable characters and situations populating any current TV series. The fat geek, who as others have said is 'still' the fat geek...even after living under near starvation conditions for 15 years. The spoiled, self-entitled, virgin queen who whines and snivels about every decision being made. The emasculated ex-militia general who caves every time the virgin queen whines. The list goes on and on. These people consistently make so many mind-numbingly stupid choices, that in fact none of them would have lasted 15 days, much less 15 years. I found myself hoping that some of the zombies from The Walking Dead would shamble on into this show and finish everyone off. Spare yourself...change channels.
Poe (2012)
High school drama class.....
I watched about 20 minutes of this movie before it became so irritating that I had to shut it off. The actors are delivering their lines so woodenly that is as though they are reading them from a teleprompter. I used the term "high school drama class"...but in fact, that would have actually been a major improvement. At least some of the people on screen would then have actually been actors.
An incredibly stupid premise for an equally stupid movie. If you want to see a movie tied to Edgar Allen Poe, I would suggest 'The Raven'...as it actually uses genuine actors.
It should come as no surprise that this 'direct to video' turkey would otherwise never have seen the light of day....If they had first shown it in theaters, they would have to have given the DVDs away for free...a it wouldn't even a bargain at that price.
The American (2010)
Two dimensional
Only the ten minutes or so of actual action in this movie save it from the lowest rating. The characters in this film are two dimensional, at best. Clooney deadpans his way through this film while seeming to want to be some place else. The special, custom rifle that he "builds" is nothing more than an off-the-shelf Mini-14, with a garage built suppressor that is a bit hard to believe. My wife rented this film, as she thought it would be something I would enjoy...sadly, she was mistaken. The plot is vague, which does not necessarily mean deep....a number of reviewers have compared this movie to Jean-Pierre Melville's "Le Samourai" and even Luc Besson's "The Professional" this, however, is more Bergman than anything else. I strongly suspect, based on discussions with friends who saw this, that as they come out of the theatre...bored and confused that they feel that they must have missed some hidden meaning or secret....so it becomes "Wow, what a deep study into the mind of an aging assassin." Unfortunately this movie doesn't reveal anything.
Hard Candy (2005)
Too bad you can't give less than one star...
Watched this the other night....what an absolute turkey. The only abuse apparent in this movie is to the poor viewers. Shallow, clichéd, simplistic film with no redeeming features at all.
Some people have raved about the cinematography, but I've seen better videos made with a cell phone.
Better than watching this film would be having a root canal job done, or having Kathy Bates break your ankles, ala Misery.
About one third of the way into the movie I actually found myself beginning to root for the pedophile....until he ticked me off with his incredible lack of any sense of self preservation, and his general ineptitude. He should have broken loose, killed the little cow....and put us all out of our misery.