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Paul-4042
Reviews
Dracula's Curse (2006)
The Usual Format
I won't say it was a bad offering, but why doesn't someone make a vampire film that actually is a vampire film and not another kung fu action movie where the villains just happen to drink blood? What we get from Dracula's Curse is once again lots of fancy gunplay, swordfighting and martial arts involving hot goth chicks, which seems to have become the rule for vampire films these days (Blade, Underworld, Van Helsing etc. etc.) The cast perform adequately, but there's nothing much for them to do except strike poses looking cool or angry. The fights are choreographed okay and there's no poorly done CGI to laugh at, but we have seen this sort of thing before and I expect better from The Asylum.
Perfect Hideout (2008)
Oh Dear. Oh dear, oh dear...
This movie is so bad that I've registered on IMDb just to say how bad it truly was. The setup is okay as is the plot twist (the "victim" of the hostage takers is actually a psychopathic serial killer who has murdered the real homeowners) and as for the acting, really I just pity the actors: there wasn't really much they could do. The promising start quickly descends into super-stupidity as revenge crazed cop father of cop son - shot by Solimeno earlier - merrily orders his men to their deaths, or to murder anyone in sight (luckily his Keystone Cop "marksmen" can't hit a cow's backside with a banjo) and a released (oops!) Zane uses his Amazing Kitchen Knife Man supervillain powers to kill red shirt armed police faster than anyone can blink. While the first half is played straight, it's almost as if the writers realised how ridiculous the whole thing was and so decided to put in some slightly witty dialogue and add a "comedy" tag to cover themselves. Watch with your brain taken out and put in a jar.