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One Man, One Beard... Whole lot o servant girls.
19 April 2004
Laughing heartily in the face of danger, Steve Reeves leads the way in Hercules: Unchained, a film about just how much tail you can get with a good beard. Okay, so there's a story about two sassy brothers' fight over a kingdom, a random encounter with the son of the Earth god and waters of forgetfulness... great. The real story here: oiled-up men in loincloths having their way with giggling servant girls. This movie jam packed with servant girls running from Herc and Ulysses down stairs, around corners and pretty much any direction that shows off the goods. As if that wasn't enough to get you totally pumped about this movie while cleaning the house... fake tigers! If you're a fan of fake tigers in fake tiger fights... you'll need to rent this one soon. Mostly though, its about the servant girls. 8 out of 10.
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Koyaanisqatsi (1982)
10/10
It starts slow, like making sweet love...
13 April 2004
I remember the first time I saw this movie in 9th grade. My hippy English teacher showed this to the class and, as would be expected of students that age, most everyone had their head down after 15 minutes. I'll tell you this much, the movie is not going to start out punching you in the gut with exploding buildings (though the film hasn't forgotten that). It works like this: Way way way out in sprawling, pristine nature shots and moving inward towards human civilization with increasing pace throughout the film. At about 50 minutes into the film get ready to have your socks officially rocked off as Philip Glass' signature 'One-note symphony' music synchronizes with the time lapse shots of the living city at night. It truly becomes explosive at times with repeating chorus sitting on top of industry hard at work. The director does make a serious attempt at a profound message about the state of the world and the problems that surround us (the now familiar concept of cities looking like circuit boards)... but you can take that or leave that. If you like time lapse, watch this movie. Godfrey Reggio has the credit for directing this film but it's Ron Fricke's cinematography that sets this film apart from the other two -qatsi films that were to follow. Check out Ron's departure film Baraka if you liked what you found in Koyaanisqatsi.
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