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Pandora and the Flying Dutchman (1951)
Check This One Out With the One You Love (or Wish You Were Lovin')
If you dig the Classic Stuff, this is a really strange and righteously romantic fable-like take on an old legend sorta-thing, made in 1950, set in 1930, done in that Classic English version of technicolor (as opposed to the candy-colored American "Wizard of Oz" style).
In the way the Brits liked to use it back in the day - usually in the capable painterly hands of this flick's cinematographer, Jack Cardiff - Technicolor was given a whole different look and feel, more muted and elusive, distant and mysterious, but no less stylized or romantic (even rapturous) than our primary-colored U.S. use of the process. In this flick, the color and look and feel of the imagery conveys the vibe of some strange stirring dream that's just so... something... that it couldn't be either true or false. It just sweeps you along in its swell... No joke, movie lovers, This Thing Is The Genuine Goods.
AVA GARDNER, smack-dab in her prime right here (somewhere in between "The Killers" & "The Barefoot Contessa", both also Great), was always sultry, seductive, and at a bit of a remove from all the mere men who wanted to get it rollin' with her. Here, she takes that mold and both fills it AND breaks through it. And she stars with JAMES MASON, who was always Really Intense, and always Really Good, and whom we also have here right in the thick of his hot-streak ("Odd Man Out", "A Star Is Born", "Bigger Than Life", "Lolita"). She's this woman who has Everything she could want, but... And he's this man who asks for Nothing, but needs Something, and...
Ladies, this one goes nice and old-school for you and the one you love. (and Gentlemen, go with the flow on this one. You'll be cool with it.) Hey, you know what? I can't say anything more, Y'all. Seek this one out and take it in.
Inception (2010)
The Most Contagious Virus in the World is... "THE STUPID"
Oh, I Got It Alright. Here It Is, The Whole Thing...
A pretty unimaginative and stressed-out white-collar white guy (maybe an architect, maybe a movie-maker) sits down in his big first-class seat on an airplane for a 10-hour flight home to L.A. from Sydney, takes a look around at the other rich passengers while he has some drinks and an Ambien or two, then falls asleep and has a LONG boring pointless dream with all them showing up in it, Wizard of Oz-style. Except Dorothy's Dustbowl Kansas Hillbillies were FAR more interesting than the buttoned-up executive types you find flying first-class these days.
Yes, every now and then (meaning all the time these days), a movie comes along that gets so much praise from a whole lot of people. And when you do see it, you realize... We are most definitely growing dumber as a human race.
This movie reminds me of a quote I read once about George W. Bush that went something like "He's not an idiot, but he's one of those people who makes idiots feel smart because they relate to him."
Yeah, this thing's not the worst, but what a WASTE. Such a waste of technical talent. SUCH a horrible waste of great actors. (Seriously, Nardo and The Hardy together on screen for the first time, and THIS is what you have them do?!? PLEASE.) I wish Edith Piaf would've bludgeoned them all to death with a microphone-stand in the first ten minutes (Juno first please), and spent the rest of the screen-time dreaming about sex, drugs, and French jazz. And not explaining it the whole time.
The Golden Bowl (2000)
AN UNSATISYING MOVIE WHERE EVERYBODY GETS WHAT THEY DESERVE (Including the Audience)
So yeah, this movie was slow and tedious, and like the world, as they say, it ends not with a bang, but with a whimper. But I think that might've been the point. Bravo./Snore.
I don't read much, but I do tend to like these literary costume jobs sometimes, because I find the way people carried themselves and treated each other back in the day to be pretty interesting, most of the time in a "what the hell were they thinking?" sorta way. Like "Thank God we've gotten past that sorta ridiculous B.S." I guess like the characters were masochists to be that way, and I guess I'm a bit of a cinematic masochist to watch them. Of course it can vary from flick to flick, but a lot of these things, both good and bad, seem to me to be about the "exquisite withholding." Scorsese's "Age of Innocence" is the best example I can think of right now.
The things that most people posting here had problems with about this movie, I think is its whole reason for being. The movie revolves around these four people, whom i think were casted and acted PERFECTLY, exactly what they were supposed to be...
Jeremy Northam's Italian dude is indeed a wet noodle. He thinks he's all suave and debonair, the lady-killer, the lover, and really he's just a cheesy boob with the spine and self-knowledge of an amoeba. He's dull, weak, and boring, but of course both of the story's women find him just FASCINATING!
Why? Because of course oftentimes women are total IDIOTS about the men "in their lives", who they fill like empty vessels with their silly-ass romantic notions without ever actually stopping to take a good look at for who they really are. (If you're reading this and thinking I'm a chauvinistic unromantic pig, you may be right, but that does not mean I'm wrong.) So of course both women are head over heels for this clown. ("He's got AN ACCENT! ...and A BEARD! ... and he's A PRINCE! Oh my god, gimme some o' THAT!")
Uma Thurman plays her character like Joan Crawford or Betty Davis, and it rings true. Why, she's an American "adventuress", dammit, and if she wants it all, well it's 'cuz she DESERVES it! Her character is such a conniving but bland and simple see-through bitch (played awesomely by Thurman) that I love how things go for her. She loses her cheesy lasagna lover and gets stuck with the stiff stuck-up asinine old idiot played by Nick Nolte. She gets WHAT SHE DESERVES.
Kate Beckinsale is great as the porcelain doll daddy's girl who never had to lift a finger (or work a brain-cell) in her entire life. Of COURSE she's gonna go for the Italian Meatball, but be too pixie-brained, weak-willed and slathered in denial to see that he and her "friend" are laying pipe together in every old building in England. And of course she ends up with the "Prince", who, even though he's with her, will never get over what a slime-ball he is, or ever fully "be hers". She gets exactly WHAT SHE DESERVES. And bless his feeble-minded greasy heart, SO DOES HE.
Lastly, Nolte's character, "the first American Billionaire" we're informed, is just an acquisitions man from the get-go, piling up statues and paintings and antiquities (and a daughter and then a wife) just so he can put them in a museum (tomb) in "American City" and say "Hey, Look what I got! Come and look at all this Sh*t that you could never afford!" He tells himself and others that he's doing it to "give back" something to the people, but he doesn't believe it himself for a minute, and neither does anybody else. And in the end, he takes his cold statue of a stupid venal wife, and his big empty pile of sh*t and goes back to install himself in his museum (tomb) along with them. He gets, in the end, exactly WHAT HE DESERVES.
As do we, the blessed/cursed audience. Awesome movie, Dude. Roll Credits.
p.s.
I Do Wish that some ballsy filmmakers would, just once, owning the rights to some old literary masterpiece like this, would do a straight-up lavish adaptation like this one, and then change the ending so that, say, Nick Nolte's character, fed-up and despondent and enraged, takes an old battle-ax off one the grand walls and chops the other three main characters to pieces, then collapses mumbling onto the gore-filled carpet, camera slow-pushes in on his blood- spattered face. Roll Credits.
Now That would be Something.
Don Jon (2013)
A Great First-Person Comedy and Character-Piece; A Fun and Funny Movie with Unexpected Depth
I so enjoyed this movie, laughing my keester off through much of it (as did most of the audience), and found myself marveling at how well its story was told and what it actually had to say. Really Good Stuff.
As you may know, this is the first feature written and directed by the actor Joseph Gordon-Levitt, who plays the main character.
Like many of those on-screen who've made the directorial leap, he proves to be a real "actor's director". He gets really good human performances from all of his players (including himself), in roles big and small.
This shouldn't be that surprising, I guess, when you look at the amazing list of great directors and actors he's worked with. He's obviously been absorbing the craft(s) of great filmmaking along the way.
What we get here is this New Jersey guido-macho fella telling us his whole take on things in first-person narration while we watch how he rolls. The list of things he cares about, ending with his Porn.
Though voice-over can often be done BADLY, here it's used just right. The tempo and tone of the images, cutting, music, etc. perfectly match this guy's whole vibe and world-view. In the way it just takes you right into Jon's head, it reminded me of different yet also awesome main-character voice-overs in "Taxi Driver", "Trainspotting", the original "Alfie", "I Love You Philip Morris", "Kiss Kiss Bang Bang", "Goodfellas", or some of the classic '70's, '80's Woody Allen flicks.
And actually, a (non-comedy) movie that "Don Jon" really reminded me of on the whole - maybe its spiritual forefather - is "Saturday Night Fever". Just like in that movie, you've got a young slicked-up cock-sure guido-macho with limited priorities and ambitions, a hum-drum home-life, a couple real friends who he hangs with, and a way with the ladies. Both "Don Juans" are contrasted between their time at the kitchen table and in the clubs doing what they do best. Both have experiences with a girl their age, and also with a bit older woman, both relationships teaching them different things. And both movies (and their main-characters) would seem to be just a look at a certain shallow frivolous existence, but actually turn out to be a whole lot more. And just like young Travolta in "Saturday Night Fever", JGL in "Don Jon" goes all the way into his character, fully committing to portraying the guy for who he really is, funny and serious, attractive and ugly, all at once.
It's not just that JGL "beefed up" for this role, or speaks with a bass-voice and Jersey accent. It's the way he subtly reveals the guy's mix of confidence and insecurity, cluelessness and knowingness, and eventual "self-discovery". He makes us both laugh at him and feel for him. It's a Really Great Performance.
And it's not the only one. Scarlett Johannsen beautifully embodies her role as the Jersey Trophy-Girl, not just with hottie-ness and shallowness, but hints of a truly lost and unsatisfied person living in her situation. In the scenes of her coming out of the movie with Jon, or forbidding him to buy cleaning supplies while she buys curtain-rods, she really says a lot with a little. Julianne Moore does a great job here helping illuminate for Jon what he's missing, and heartbreakingly revealing what she's missing along the way. Jon's parents, played so righteously by Glenne Headly and (Holy Shmacks!) Tony Danza, are a hoot to watch, and go a long way toward helping us understand Jon. And Brie Larson plays Jon's texting-obsessed little sister with subtle mastery of facial expression, not saying a thing until it's really time to.
And the performances are allowed to flow, in a funny fast-moving world nevertheless defined by routine that's expertly created by the filmmakers. The bright colors and no-waste pace. The way the camera holds the same profile-shot of Jon whenever he's in his muscle-car road-raging. Or the identical head-on, in-your-face shots of Jon while he's lifting weights, making his confession to the priest, or flipping open his lap-top to get busy. Classic. Or the way the music is really loud and out-front sometimes like the soundtrack in Jon's head, the thundering electronic stuff for him picking up in the club, and the "romantic" full orchestra music for when he's with his one true love (porn, of course).
A great commentary's happening here... the fractured fairy-tale expectations we acquire (about love, sex, relationships, success) from all the media being constantly shoved down our throats (porn, movies, sports, advertisements, computers, phones).
Another related subject woven well through the whole movie is us being lost in our modern devices, which supposedly are meant to connect us, but do exactly the opposite. Consider the sister never looking up from her texting. Or the friend "getting" the girl's number, but entering "pony-tail" instead of her name into his phone. Or Jon's dad keeping his attention glued to whatever game's on TV, and their argument about the importance of TiVo. All these things go hand-in-hand with the dilemma of a guy who can get any girl he wants, but finds it's only the opening of his lap-top computer and the sound of it turning on that can get him "really hard." This Is Where We Find Ourselves Today.
So yeah, Watch This One...
Parting Thought: One of the best audience-reaction moments EVER... I went last night to see a screening of this at the "Academy" theater in Beverly Hills, with a filmmaker friend who's a member. Mind you, these are the big mucky-mucks who give out the Oscars every year. And Jon's girl confronts him angrily about his porn-watching. He compares his porn to her "stupid movies" she likes. You should've heard the laughter when she yells "Movies and porno are different, Jon, they give AWARDS FOR MOVIES!" and his reply? "Yeah, they give awards for porn too!"
Play It As It Lays (1972)
A Great Movie, but one I found really tough to take.
I just watched this on DVD. (Yes, it is available now, at least at "Cinefile" the best video store in L.A.) And like some of the other reviews have said, it is indeed a work of art, done in the New Wave European style of the 60's & & 70's. It's rather slow and barren and bleak (like the world its characters move through), even when it's brightly-lit, well-shot, and cutting or moving fast. It's main themes and vibes are all about alienation, emptiness, futility, despair... The closest thing cinematically I can compare it to (and yes, I mean it as a huge and honest compliment) is the best of Antonioni's brand of exquisitely-realized alienation, in things like "L'Aventura" and "Red Desert".
Here you've got a 30-ish Hollywood actress, fading in beauty and belief, played so well by Tuesday Weld that when she's on screen (which is for most of the movie) you can just see and feel the energy and light going out of her right there in front of you.
The people around her aren't even particularly evil or mean; they're just THERE. But not there for her, or even for themselves. They're just self-consumed, petty, lost in their blase confusions and self-delusions. Her (ex-)husband film director, his lead actress, the wife and the mother of her gay film-producer friend (played awesomely by a quietly-aching Anthony Perkins), the cops who pull her over, her past and present f...k-buddies, the doctors at the loony-bin she ends up in, none of them hold any particular interest or key to anything for her. They're just hollow statues along her path, much like the generic road-signs she shoots at for no seeming reason while driving between the desert and L.A.
Alone in having any meaning for her is Perkins, the gay producer who is her only actual friend. But even he has nothing to offer her except "nothing", as that is what he has come to find the meaning of life to be. Their suffering chemistry together is palpable and painful to witness, culminating in their last shared time together and parting of ways...
This movie, quiet and painful though it is, is indeed a masterpiece of its kind. And not one that would ever be made today (with any studio-backing, at least... every now and then one like this, or "Requiem for a Dream" slips by). Unfortunately, LaLa Land (where I've lived for many years), and the world at large, haven't changed. I've known a few folks here who've been SO MUCH like these characters, and sadly suffered their same fates...
I hope I've made pretty clear why I think this is a difficult yet awesome movie, and let you know why you should or should not watch it. It's Really Good for "Nothing".
Spring Breakers (2012)
Boring Turd from Former Film-maker Harmony Korine
Just got home from seeing this in the theater... Double-yoo. Tee. Eff!!! Do you smell that? It's the hugely offensive odor of a condescending piece from somebody who has NO respect for his audience. And he's actually a former artist. Go figure.
Let me share why I found this thing so offensive. Or maybe first, the opposite.
No, I was Not offended by seeing the young Disney dolls all stripped down, dumbed down, and wildin' out. All 4 of these girls are eye-candy enough to raise Woodrow Wilson from the grave, and I was happy to see them in bikinis and less, getting their spring-break slut on. There's a time and place for everything, and that's what spring break is for, after all. Sun and sand and swimming pool bars. Super-squirters and wet t-shirts. Dancing and dares and strip-games and laughs. Hook-ups with beautiful strangers. Shots and beers and bongs and blunts and rails and funnels. Naughty wish-fulfillment. Silliness and sex and boundary-hopping thrills. This is no surprise to all but the most sheltered college kids or parents in denial.
Of course, for simple (or intricate) on-screen nudity and debauchery, we all can choose from a million different porno's. (That's right. When you're so inclined, let your perv flag fly.)
If it's vicarious spring-breakness and partying we're seeking, there's a whole film genre to watch, going back to "Where the Boys Are" and "Gidget" and whatnot. Even as far back as the flapper films of the silent era, or flicks from Clara Bow and Mae West and the like. And up through now, with "Project X"/"Hangover"-type stuff.
If insightful social commentary (with or without the satire) is your thing, there are So Many flicks to check out, from classics like "Lost Weekend", "Breakfast at Tiffany's", or "Days of Wine & Roses", up through "Natural Born Killers", "Trainspotting", or "Boogie Nights" modern stuff.
If it's an exciting electric neon candy-color-palette to feast your eyes on, there's the "Tron" flicks, "Pleasantville", "Speedracer", any number of sci-fi's, or a must-see that was shot by the same cinematographer as this one, "Enter the Void".
If its non-traditional (or even non-narrative) story-telling you want, there's Welles, Brackhage, Deren, Antonioni, Bertolucci, Renais, Godard, Truffaut, Tarantino, Aronofsky, Gilliam, Noe, Boyle, Nolan, Soderbergh, (even Korine), and the list goes on and on.
I would not have a problem with this piece if it was honestly going for any or all of the above things, but I do have a problem with it. Because it's really not going for anything. This thing was beyond phoned-in. It's the 2nd one in a row from Harmony Korine (after "Trash humpers") that treats the audience like clueless pigs that will just guzzle down anything thrown into our pen. Movies are open for interpretation, but there has to be something to interpret.
Mind you, this is the same guy whose first three directorial efforts - "Gummo", "julien-donkey boy" & "Mister Lonely" - were really challenging but rewarding works. Films to make you squirm & think & feel & reel & flinch from & maybe even delight in. When I saw his name at the end of the trailer, I was All In. But just like with "Trash humpers", he took what was no more than a 1-trick pony, 1-note idea, and tried to pass it off to the world as a feature- length film, something to dig into. With his 2 latest, he's really pushed the envelope of "No There There."
"Spring Breakers" is just the most cynical substitution for actual film-making you could think of. Korine takes 4 mousketeer bunnies, throws them into spring-break wish-fulfillment land, spices the dish with a robbery, and then tries to sizzle it with the menace and coolness of gun-toting drug-dealers horn-dogging on them and beefing on each other. It's not enough to say that this thing didn't work. It's not a misfire, just a total dishonest cop-out.
There is not one minute of this non-movie, besides the standard spring-break partying, that is even remotely believable. Not Even. Though Franco does actually dig in and commit to his role with real intensity and relish, the interactions between him and the girls and his drug rival are ridiculous. (The only exception is Selena Gomez, and, I take it back, the one moment that feels real in the whole thing is her fearful crying when she begs to go home.)
The way the violence is handled is just stupid. The girls' arrest and court hearing ring totally false. And I've never heard Gucci Mane as a rapper, but Homey couldn't act his way out of a burger wrapper.
The random way it's shot and edited, along with the redundant sound-design and dialogue, are probably things Korine and his defenders would try to pass off as "artful", but they're just tedious and, saddest of all for a flick with this much buns & guns & ammo, Boring. Yes, it's... So... Boring. The best thing I can think to say about the film's "different" use of these devices is that it might be some feeble attempt at a teenybopper's "Last Year at Marienbad". But that's probably way too generous.
That about sums it up. So sucky yucky because I really wanted to like this thing, even though after "Trash-humpers" I had my fingers crossed. It didn't help. You know, lipstick on a pig and all that jazz. But alas...
There was a time when Harmony Korine made films. Lately he just seems to be making what any A-hole can make: Turds.