3 From Hell. Hmmmm. Well, it was a "meh" from me. It totally failed to take the characters any further and simply resorted to just more of the same and not even as well done as before. The storyline was a thin a tissue paper with many glaring plot hole. I think Zombie has exhausted his filmmaking career if this is all he can produce now.
Reviews
9 Reviews
Bohemian Rhapsody
(2018)
Too short at 2hr 14min
1 November 2018
Well, superfans will always find fault with anything like this, because they know every last detail, but the average bloke in the street will (and does) love it as a celebration of Freddie and Queen. I personally really liked it, but think it would probably have been better handled as a 6 part miniseries, because at 2hr 14mins it actually felt rushed. Malek's performance was nothing short of amazing! Most of the writing was suitably camp as Christmas and also very cheesy... and we know they always rewrite history with these things for dramatic effect, just look at Darkest Hour. Overall, a great movie for fans and non fans alike to just enjoy and not over analyse.
Camping
(2018)
Painfully unfunny compared to U.K. original
23 October 2018
Oh dear or dear oh dear! Talk about lost in translation!!! This US remake pales into insignificance compared to the amazing dark and cringingly hilarious UK original series. Seriously, save yourself from this abismal remake and just watch the hugely superior original.
Dunkirk
(2017)
Missed Opportunity 😔
29 July 2017
Lacking in scale, lacking in back story, lacking in character development, lacking in crucial details, lacking in respect for the scale of the operation planning back at Dover & the collaboration with the French navy.
It's not so much that it's bad at what it DOES show, but more about what it doesn't. Also, this was not the movie epic I expected from a 2017 top director. This is no Saving Private Ryan or Hacksaw Ridge. This is a missed opportunity to show the WHOLE story of Dunkirk.
The BBC did a much better job in 2004 with their low budget 3 part mini-series (docudrama).
Disappointed. 6 our of 10.
It's not so much that it's bad at what it DOES show, but more about what it doesn't. Also, this was not the movie epic I expected from a 2017 top director. This is no Saving Private Ryan or Hacksaw Ridge. This is a missed opportunity to show the WHOLE story of Dunkirk.
The BBC did a much better job in 2004 with their low budget 3 part mini-series (docudrama).
Disappointed. 6 our of 10.
Slow West
(2015)
Things I learnt from Slow West
7 July 2015
Warning: Spoilers
Things I learnt from Slow West: You should never trust an Internet Movie Database rating... and you can not always make perfect butter the first time you try... yup, that's about it!
I guess the title should have been a warning if I'm totally honest. Fas(t)bender, slow movie. Truly makes you feel like you've been conned by the end of the movie. Maybe that was the point, that we should not expect the ending we'd hoped for? Well there's one thing I do expect and that's a refund of my wasted time watching this movie. John Ford is no doubt turning in his grave right now. Which would be a welcome trade for the pain and time spent watching Slow West. My advice?... if you're a fan of westerns... give this a wide berth.
I guess the title should have been a warning if I'm totally honest. Fas(t)bender, slow movie. Truly makes you feel like you've been conned by the end of the movie. Maybe that was the point, that we should not expect the ending we'd hoped for? Well there's one thing I do expect and that's a refund of my wasted time watching this movie. John Ford is no doubt turning in his grave right now. Which would be a welcome trade for the pain and time spent watching Slow West. My advice?... if you're a fan of westerns... give this a wide berth.
Dragon Wars: D-War
(2007)
Oh my god this was AWFUL!
19 November 2007
I had high hopes for this movie after seeing the action packed trailer, but now I know why there was not dialogue in the trailers.... BECAUSE IT'S GOD AWFUL!!! This movie sucked the big one in soooo many ways! Poor acting, stupid dumb characters, bad directing and edited like a bad fan movie, next to zero plot and what plot there was could have made barely 30mins of movie, terrible set pieces, badly directed cgi... etc... etc... etc...
Looks like they blew the budget on the cgi and forgot about the rest, even though the cgi was fairly poor by todays standards (see transformers)... in fact, that's my advice to you if you are thinking about seeing this movie, SEE TRANSFORMERS!... even if you've already seen it 50 times already, see it again and don't bother with this RUBBISH!
I feel like suing for the hour and 40 minutes of my life I can't get back! ;)
Looks like they blew the budget on the cgi and forgot about the rest, even though the cgi was fairly poor by todays standards (see transformers)... in fact, that's my advice to you if you are thinking about seeing this movie, SEE TRANSFORMERS!... even if you've already seen it 50 times already, see it again and don't bother with this RUBBISH!
I feel like suing for the hour and 40 minutes of my life I can't get back! ;)
Them
(2006)
French masterclass in suspense.
8 August 2006
What a pleasant surprise this film was. It literally drips with suspense from the opening scenes, right up to the last few minutes. I had my hand close to my face for much of it, just waiting for the shocks. I'm a big fan of French cinema and this kind of movie will show you why... attention to detail, natural acting and not afraid to divert from the mainstream. It builds beautifully, is directed by two craftsmen in their art and the performances from the two main actors are very natural and just excellent. Great premise and the fact that it's based on true events only adds to the creep factor. Fits perfectly in to it's short running time of 77 minutes. Great unexpected conclusion. Best french film of it's type since High Tension. Why can't there be more like this superb masterclass in suspense????
Bubba Ho-Tep
(2002)
Painfully Funny! (may contain spoilers)
16 March 2004
Warning: Spoilers
One of the funniest films I have ever seen. My stomach was cramping up from laughing so much and I was in serious pain (I kid you not)... it's set in a sleepy old folks home in the Texas and the main character is Elvis (Bruce Campbell)... you see, he didn't die, that was an Elvis impersonator who the real Elvis cut a secret deal to traded places with to get out of the spotlight... The real Elvis then went on to be a very good Elvis impersonator until he dislocated his hip and fell off stage and into a coma for a few years, therefore missing his opportunity to reclaim his former fame after the stand-in died.
The other main character is a old black guy (Ossie Davis) who claims to be JFK and that the CIA replaced part of his brain with a bag of sand and dyed him black!
You ain't heard nothin' yet......
The rest home is under attack late a night by a soul sucking mummy who's feeding on the souls of the weak and infirm, so when they die no one bats an eyelid, except JFK and his compadre Elvis, who together take on the evil that's threatening their meagre existence.
This is truly one of the most original storylines and funniest films I have ever seen.
The other main character is a old black guy (Ossie Davis) who claims to be JFK and that the CIA replaced part of his brain with a bag of sand and dyed him black!
You ain't heard nothin' yet......
The rest home is under attack late a night by a soul sucking mummy who's feeding on the souls of the weak and infirm, so when they die no one bats an eyelid, except JFK and his compadre Elvis, who together take on the evil that's threatening their meagre existence.
This is truly one of the most original storylines and funniest films I have ever seen.
The Grey Zone
(2001)
A shocking story, badly told.
9 July 2003
After such films as 'Schindler's List' telling the harrowing story of the holocaust with such breathtaking realism, The Grey Zone does not do this important story any justice.
How can A-list actors (with the exception of Harvey Keitel) think they can be in anyway convincing playing the part of a Hungarian or Polish prisoner if they don't make even the slightest effort to mask their American accents?? And as for the dialogue.... modern dialogue, the likes of which wouldn't be out of place in Quentin Tarantino movie is not at all convincing in a piece set in the 1940's and if you are using lines such as 'She doesn't understand German', I think it would be important to have spoken German and not English (don't you?).
Why did this movie get made so badly.... it's simply not acceptable these days to not make an effort when you are trying to portray life real events such as these to make it REAL!
It makes me wonder.... if John Wayne was still alive, he'd have probably been cast!
No character depth, confusing camera work, no emotion.
Very disappointing ** / *****
How can A-list actors (with the exception of Harvey Keitel) think they can be in anyway convincing playing the part of a Hungarian or Polish prisoner if they don't make even the slightest effort to mask their American accents?? And as for the dialogue.... modern dialogue, the likes of which wouldn't be out of place in Quentin Tarantino movie is not at all convincing in a piece set in the 1940's and if you are using lines such as 'She doesn't understand German', I think it would be important to have spoken German and not English (don't you?).
Why did this movie get made so badly.... it's simply not acceptable these days to not make an effort when you are trying to portray life real events such as these to make it REAL!
It makes me wonder.... if John Wayne was still alive, he'd have probably been cast!
No character depth, confusing camera work, no emotion.
Very disappointing ** / *****
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