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maury-markowitz
Reviews
By Dawn's Early Light (1990)
Too busy for greatness
There are actually a lot of things to like of this movie, but unfortunately the writers didn't know where to stop. The result is a mash of sub-plots that do nothing to advance the core plot of the movie. Whether or not that core is enough to keep the movie afloat is hard to say, but there's some fine moments from both Martin Landau and James Earl Jones, offset only to a degree by Darren McGavin's hammy performance.
To be honest, I think the entire bomber subplot could be removed without effecting the outcome much. Especially at the end, it seems the writers just kept adding new events to that plot line without any obvious need or plan. Reduced to its core there's maybe 1 hour of movie here, and that might have worked on its own. But as a two hour movie I think it fails.
Her Secret Life (1987)
Great little tense thriller
I saw this by chance while channel flipping one winter night. What caught me was the opening title sequence: a series of puzzle pieces "falling" into view from a point behind the camera. The pieces slowly built up the lead character's face, wearing a somewhat serious (or perhaps harried) expression. That was it, I was intrigued.
I like complex plots, it keeps me focused on the story and allows me to overlook any of the less glaring errors. So I probably would have liked this in any event. But there was nothing to gloss over; for a TV movie the production quality was excellent, the timing perfect, and the direction almost perfect. The "secret life" plot line has been done to death, especially around this time with the cold war winding down. But this movie managed to put a fresh twist on it, and it's not really part of the plot other than framing. The story is the story, and it's a good one.
But as others have said, it's really Capshaw's performance that makes this shine. It's perfectly in tune with the story, a performance that never left me wondering about motives or second- guessing the underlying setup. Throughout, she simply *is* the character, far more convincing than Matt Damon's unconvincing superman, for instance. The lack of ridiculous fight scenes helps pull this off, but it's certainly not the only reason.
The ending was a little disappointing, and somewhat predictable. But there was little else they could do with it; the story came to its natural conclusion and all that was left would be to roll the credits. It certainly didn't distract from the enjoyment.
So if you like thrillers, especially in the vein of No Way Out, I think you'll be very happy with this movie.
Starcrash (1978)
Best worse movie ever
If you want to see how bad this is, spare yourself the whole thing and just watch the opening scene. Watching the horrible actors manage flub the timing of their three-word sentences is a sight to behold.
Funny? Absolutely! Watching the bad guy order his troops into combat with the stirring words of "Kill!" while they slide down the bat poles will bring a smile to the face of anyone. And that soundtrack, wow!
Forget the nonsensical plot, terrible special effects and poor acting, it's got Christopher Plumber and a bunch of excuses for Stella Star to get attacked by the worst stop-frame animated robots in history. What more could you ask for?
Sky Bandits (1986)
What were they thinking?
As others have noted, this movie is filled with bad effects, flat acting and any number of other problems. Yet there are many moments where it seems like the movie might work. But just when things start to get rolling, the timing goes out and suddenly its the most boring thing you've seen.
Consider the opening. It starts with a bunch of fast action scenes of our heroic duo blowing up banks one after another in quick succession. One of these consists of nothing more than throwing a bundle of dynamite in the door, causing the entire building to explode into matchsticks. Dumb, but fun.
And then for no reason I'll ever understand, the next heist is shown in excruciating detail... this time they're drilling holes into the safe and setting up this elaborate system for pouring in nitro. I don't know how they managed to do it, but they dragged this scene on for minute after minute of excruciating nothingness as the two banter on mindlessly, setting themselves up all-too-obviously to get caught. The entire movie dies right there, the pace just kills.
And it keeps doing this, over and over. Then we're in Europe, where there's a bunch of fast scenes while they shoot down a bomber with their pistols and then fly off. An excruciating scene follows. And again, and again and AGAIN. Over and over it looks like they just might pull it off and save it, only to bore you to death seconds later.
Bizarre!
Real Men (1987)
Possibly the worst movie I've seen.
How bad is this movie?
When it appeared in the video stores only a few weeks after flaming out in theatres, I remember they had a big cut-out of the duo handing from the roof of the local video store.
I turned to my friend, who had seen it with me, and stated rhetorically how bad it was. He didn't remember the movie. It took several minutes of explaining the "plot" before he remembered seeing it with me.
It was *that* bad. So bad that it not only erased itself from your memory as you walked out of the theatre, but put up active blocks to prevent you from remembering it, just in case.
What is that bad? Everything! The acting is utterly hopeless, the action scenes poorly scripted, dumb dialog, jokes so overly-telegraphed that Mel Brooks would blush, and an absolutely moronic plot that I suspect the writers thought was oh-so-clever.
Then there's a shoot-out, the end.
Uggg.