robotmonkeycat's Reviews

Rex Park: Curse of the Golden Buddha (2021)

2/10

29 December 2023

Tied for the worst film that I have watched this year.

With the exception of maybe one, the characters were super annoying personality-wise, and they were constantly running a stream of idiotic dialogue. The lone exception amongst the main three was the character played by Rachael Sanchez, who seemed like the only one who was not some hyperactive, puffed-up, phony persona. She didn't have very many lines by comparison, so perhaps she approached something like that at one point or another.

As obnoxious as the dialogue was, the video & sound effects were somewhat even more so. The film was full of emoticons and phone graphics that would pop up on occasion, and there was even a laugh track to let you know when the film was attempting humor.

Speaking of humor, there was a lot of the toilet variety within it, and some pretty gross stuff at that.

Suffice it to say, I will not be watching again, and I recommend avoiding it.

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The Case of the Dead Deadman (2020)

4/10

It's an okay Spoof Comedy.

27 June 2023

There were several dumb jokes/gags*, some amusing ones, and at least a few that seemed like I had seen before in American films like The Naked Gun series and National Lampoon's Loaded Weapon. Perhaps even Airplane. (*not something that I necessarily dislike, but there were many in her that I could have done without)

I feel like the spoof genre has been run into the ground, and most from the past 20 years, get too obsessed with the gags, and forget to tell a decent story, but I am still willing to watch the ones that I haven't seen, and I will certainly re-watch the classics.

I am unlikely to watch again.

It's not one that I would recommend or say to avoid.

Available on Tubi TV.

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Zena (2015)

3/10

Found it amusing.

4 March 2023

It's a bit of a Christian film, and I am not a Christian, but there was nothing about that aspect per se, that bothered me about the film. There were lines related to it that I did find amusing. Like the one's about the deceased mother's dream of Zena going to bible college.

I don't want to give the wrong impression, the Christian side of the story was fairly limited, and it wasn't preachy. At times, it didn't seem like one at all, and sometimes seemed like an anti-Christian film, but little things would occasionally pop-up and it was a part of the end message Zena delivers.

Found a lot of script & story weird and the production a bit weak. Not weird in a cool way, but in a cheesy amusing way. I'm sure there were budgetary constraints, but they couldn't get a crowd for their showcase performance that happened early in the film. (I'm pretty sure there was supposed to an audience there.)

The lead had a nice voice and her songs were okay. Not really my fare but not a style I avoid. (I'm assuming it was her voice.)

There's a lot more that I would to say, but it would get into spoiler territory, but I will mention that I didn't care for something that happened near the end. It wasn't terrible just a bit of a eye-rolling groaner.

This movie is ripe for riffing, so might watch again as part of a cheesy movie night, and I wouldn't recommend it beyond that.

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Adventure at the Center of the Earth (1965)

3/10

¡Delicioso queso apestoso!

26 September 2022

There's a lot wrong with this one, but it's still fun.

I have so much to say, but I also don't want to give anything away.

I will say that I loved the costumes for the creatures. I think with regards to the bat one, they had a different face for the close-up shots than they did for the long shots and action sequences. The make-up in the close-ups was very intricate, and I imagine it was giant time-saver to have a more rudimentary mask for the others. It almost seemed like the close-ups were from a different movie. I imagine they were just all done in one day with maybe enough footage for one or two reels with the character doing a few reactions and looking different directions. Just to be used a quick cuts.

I also liked the score.

I will probably watch again.

Highly recommended for a cheesy movie night or ¡Noche de cine cursi!

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The Ship of Monsters (1960)

6/10

¡Queso delicioso!

25 September 2022

Fun & funny Sci-Fi/Horror/Comedy.

It's pretty silly, but it hit my funny bone in all the right spots.

The story takes an unexpected turn in the middle, which made it all so much the better.

I loved everything about this movie: the performances, the sets, the space ladies & their costumes, the songs, the robot, & the space creatures.

All of the outer space shots are from other movies, but that's fine, as the were good shots.

Will watch again and would like to add to my DVD collection.

Highly recommended to fans of cheesy movies and a moderate recommendation to others.

Watched YouTube video on my phone, but it seems of excellent quality.

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Hyperfutura (2013)

6/10

Very visually oriented film

6 September 2022

Lot of flash and only a little substance*, but that was fine, as it doesn't really need the latter for enjoyment or to get its point across. (*There was probably more in the poem on which the film was based. It is read during the closing credits.)

Will watch again at some point, but it would most likely be done when I'm in a drug induced haze. It seem very fitting for that kind of mood.

Not one I would recommend as I definitely feel it's not for everyone, and I'm only doing a review here as all the other reviews seemed fairly negative.

Ad free YouTube video I watched is of excellent quality and appears to have been uploaded by the creator. Also, available on Tubi.

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The Seven Mysteries of Life (1994)

6/10

A nice, light, offbeat comedy.

6 September 2022

Fun, charming, and amusing Sci-Fi/Fantasy/Comedy.

Love the cast and the music choices.

Liked the way the dream sequences were in color and real life was in black and white.

Was hoping to one day visit the Cats Eye Cafe, which was one of the locations, but apparently it closed down many years ago, so a little sad about that.

Will watch again, someday, as it made for a nice afternoon watch. I could see watching it as a late night feature, as well.

Recommended to fans of offbeat indie cinema.

YouTube video I watched is of excellent quality and was uploaded by the creator, Greg Lachow(I'm assuming).

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Golden Buddha Against the Snake Phantom (1982)

3/10

Except for the animal deaths, it's a nice martial arts cheese fest with some fun scenes.

13 June 2022

Saw as King Kong vs. The Snake Phantom

It's an okay Martial Arts/Fantasy film.

The bad: I'm not positive but I suspect they harmed or killed a more than a few snakes in this film. I think one snake was painted gold. Now in fairness, some of the instances could have involved a rubber snake as the quality of ones at the time was probably as good as it is today. Talking joke shop/toy store quality. Particularly thinking about a scene where a character picks one up and swings it around by its tail.

Some chickens were also killed. One probably by a boa constrictor. Kind of just showed the aftermath or final moments of a squeeze.

The good: Lot of cheese, some nice fight scenes, fun villains, a fun hero monk, and a great final battle.

Liked seeing the folks in what I'm assuming is their native garb(at least for the time period). Very lovely and colorful.

Probably won't watch again because of the animal issues, which is a little frustrating as it does have some fun & cool bits.

Not one I would recommend because of said issues. (It's not super extreme, but it's there.)

Video I watched on YouTube is okay for a small to medium frame. It has English subtitles but the longer ones are cropped of on the edge as if they were imprinted on a print in the original aspect.

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Jungle Jim (1948)

3/10

Is it really in Africa?

4 December 2021

Is it thought to be there because of the source material?

Yes, a lot of the animals are from there (and some are not), but there are no African people in the film. All of the natives are either Asian or made to look so.

It's pretty cheesy and only slightly cringe, regardless.

It's got some chuckles, but not one I would recommend beyond a cheesy movie night.

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Toofan Rani (1985)

5/10

Lots of fun.

18 July 2021

Great score, good music & dancing, and loads of cheesy looking Karate action that is enhanced by camera/film editing tricks.

Watched the Hindi dubbed version on youtube, and since I don't understand that language, I had to piece together what was happening. It wasn't that complicated a plot, so that was not very difficult. Plus the movie is heavy in the action department and has 4 musical numbers.

Movie is loads of fun and probably only available on youtube. (Very good quality upload.)

External reviews have some spoilers but they have some good info on the film.

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Fly Me to the Moon (1988)

3/10

Weird, funny, and sometimes, eye-rolling dumb but...

7 June 2021

Warning: Spoilers

But still in an amused groaning way.

Spoilers are mild.

Starts off a little pervy, and while cringe, it's pretty mild only a few brief* instances. (*no pun intended - you see ladies not very sexy undies)

At about 15 minutes in, they get into a time machine and interact with some historical Filipino figures in mostly goofy that way that ultimately keeps the historical record intact or seemingly makes it so. (They save someone from dying, who didn't die at that point in time in our history.)

At the 30 minute mark, they are back in the present and meet up with the scientist who built the machine. He has also built a spaceship and wants them to fly it to the Moon. It seems like their only option to escape from the gangsters they were from whom they were running when they hid in the time machine.

So they head to the Moon, run into Superman on the way(literally), and while on the Moon, they meet a space prince and princess or (king and queen) whose child has been taken by an evil overlord & overlady(also evil), and they need the assistance these young men to rescue them. They agree, and the movie gets a bit weirder.

Movie uses theme music from Superman, E. T.(I think), Back to the Future, Beverly Hills Cop(Axel F), and Jaws. Also, plays a version of "Fly Me to the Moon".

Video I viewed on youtube was not of great quality but watchable.

I only half watched it. Mostly just paying attention to the action/comedic scenes, of which there were plenty, and catching up on twitter during some of the dialog parts, which were in Filipino. (no subtitles)

If you can get past the first part, and you're in a weird state of mind, then I'd give it a mild recommendation. I might half-watch again, someday.

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Crossover Dreams (1985)

5/10

Pretty good

15 January 2021

The plot is fairly predictable, but it does give a nice "slice of life" view of the Salsa scene & Puerto Rican community in New York City circa 1984 to 1985. Since it's 35 years later, it's almost a documentary look at various neighborhoods from that time. Would like to see a then & now of the shooting locations.

Has a nice soundtrack & score.

Had never heard of Ballistic Kisses before seeing, so grateful I was introduced to them via this movie.

Couldn't tell that this was Ruben Blades first feature. I knew he was also a singer/songwriter, but surprised to learn that he was doing it prior to being an actor.

Watched on youtube via my phone and Elizabeth Peña seemed familiar(vocal mannerisms) but didn't recognize. Her long hair and video quality didn't help.

Not something I would say was a must see, but even though I thought the story was bland, I did enjoy watching it as I worked on other stuff.

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