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The Guardians of Justice (2022)
8/10 - Loved it!
Take away the roided-out highly paid actors, take away the expensive but quickly ageing CGI, bring back nostalgia, add a detective storyline and boil with lots of action while keeping it borderline cliché (in a good way) - you get an easy-to-watch show with plenty of twists that you can binge and feel good about it.
I want to see more!
The Matrix Resurrections (2021)
The Matrix: Loose ends
The Matrix started a revolution in how we perceive movies, how movies are made and how stories are told. The Wachowskis did an amazing job with the first 3 installments in The Matrix saga, however this fourth chapter is something nobody asked for.
First of all, there are old and new characters popping in and out of existence just like that. We really needed a closer look at Trinity's personal life inside the matrix to make her struggle more believable, for example. We needed to know more about the new crew.
Second, the CGI seems somewhat worse than 20 years ago.
Third, fighting is now more about pushing. Walls get the real punches, characters push each other real hard.
Finally, the ending is weird and once you see it you know this movie is just not taking itself seriously any longer. I could easily skip this movie and pretend it never happened.
Foundation: The First Crisis (2021)
Apple hired the wrong people
OK, I understand that now is the time for high production cost Sci-Fi TV and movies but this is getting out of hand. It doesn't matter how much money you throw at this, it will never be any good.
The Empire has the tech to scan brains and memories but they never do it on the staff who work for them. This would have rendered 80% of this episode meaningless. Risking Brother Dawn's life just to see who's plotting against the regime is hilarious. They could have just run background checks on everyone or scanned their brains.
Do we even need Hardin to make a full circle and return to Terminus? After all, her journey is just a time filler and in no way develops or establishes her any further than when we saw her first. We could have had this episode's ending right after the episode where the barrier is broken and before the battle ends. No need to go through all this space odyssey mumbo jumbo.
What was Hari waiting for? How was all this intentional and somehow predicted? Psychohistory is supposed to make predictions on vast scales, not personal actions and yet we have Hari try to micromanage.
I thought I'd read the book after watching season 1, but even though, as I am told, the source material and the show are quite different, I feel less and less eager to read it. This show's lack of logic, no character development and bad acting (Lee Pace is carrying the show and his acting is fantastic) just stains the source material leaving people to wonder was the book really that good.
Foundation: The Missing Piece (2021)
Take it down a notch, Michael Burnham!
This episode is a bit better than the last, however there is a lot more to be desired from a show that's been based on such source material.
Somehow the show is developing multiple storylines but not the characters. This episode was saved only by the acting of Lee Pace and if we had more episodes where Brother Day is in focus, maybe the show would be better.
Michael Burnham is, again, discovering new powers and her storyline so far has depended on the clumsiness of her foes and the lack of shooting ability of an automated security system. Giving everyone attitude is just a bonus. For some reason her captors just keep her alive regardless of what she does and says, almost like a weird reverse Stockholm syndrome. If the entire show depends no keeping her alive in absurd situations while giving her more supernatural powers, I am out!
Foundation: Mysteries and Martyrs (2021)
I really don't care about the books and source material
Very few things make sense now in this 7th episode. At this point it's all about wasting a unique opportunity to make TV history. Usually it takes a couple of seasons before a show gets unwatchable or simply boring, but here thing worsen by the episode.
First of all, everyone seems to be making irrational decisions but the good guys get away with it. Second, knowing and doing stuff right is just taken for granted. Third, somehow it's all part of some grand plan which is unraveling before our eyes regardless of what decisions are being made. Fourth and final, how did the Empire last for so many generations or even was established in the first place if everyone was so unhappy with it? It can't be all that bad if the Empire is willing to negotiate first with every faction and giving them what they want with just one word. Seems like a pretty cool regime to me. "We don't have enough water." - "OK, we will just build some planetary irrigation and water distribution system" - "Thanks, Empire!" - The end!
Foundation: Death and the Maiden (2021)
I haven't read any of the books
People doing random stuff and random stuff happens for no apparent reason - this is how I would describe this episode without spoilers.
The lack of character development is simply mind-numbing at this point. 6 hours into this show and all characters are just involved in an "and then" script. I just start to feel sorry for the effort that some of the actors are really trying to put into this.
It's really sad when the entire first season of this show is only as good as the final episodes of Game of Thrones.
They should change the title from Foundation to In Desperate Need of Reboot.
Foundation: Upon Awakening (2021)
I haven't read the books but the show is...
Ok, no spoilers.
The first 18 minutes are just one long and boring prelude. You can either skip this first act or have someone with actual storytelling skills tell you what this is about (if they have figured it out).
Then we switch to shaky camera fighting scenes and the sequel to the previous episode which ended in a cliffhanger.
50 minutes wasted. If you cut out all the bad acting, walking in corridors, opening doors, talking to computers, bad fighting scenes and dialogs that have no impact on character or plot development, we could probably watch 10 minutes of OK screen time.
Foundation: The Mathematician's Ghost (2021)
Started with a bang and...
OK, after the first 2 episodes I was almost convinced this show could be something to watch and discuss with friends. Again, I felt betrayed.
I wouldn't discuss drifting away from the books because I've never read them. I am only looking at the series adaptation. It's just hard to watch at times. Most of the actors are just flat in their roles. It appears to me that there is no character development and thus viewers simply don't care what happens to anyone. I just couldn't find myself to like or be like anyone on screen.
Characters just show up on screen as giving everyone attitude, being ruthless or scared for their lives. There's no growing, maturing or changing after 3 full episodes. It's starting be painful.
Foundation: Barbarians at the Gate (2021)
What was that?
This review is coming from a person who's never read the books.
After the first two episodes I find the series to be deeply boring. The lack of character development and flat acting about 85% of the time is making this show turning into white noise really fast.
A lot of the important events are being told in dialogs between poorly developed characters played by actors that are hardly convincing. I would much rather see scenes from some of the events that are talked about, instead of people just having conversations. Show, don't tell.
Another thing that's been really sticking out is how Salvor Hardin is just giving everyone attitude and trying to fit in as a warrior, interrogator, negotiator etc. It just makes this character superficial and more of a Mary Sue.
Unless this show really picks up the pace and does some better character development, it would be another wasted opportunity.
Vanquish (2021)
From Shawshank to zero.
I understand Morgan Freeman also needs screen time in these harsh times but not like this... This is just painful. I'd resort to mowing lawns or babysitting but not this. I imagine a Bowfinger type of situation where they use Freeman's slow twin and some candid cameras to shoot this thing.
Vivarium (2019)
It doesn't look like a waste of time but it sure is.
Good acting, excellent actors, interesting beginning... and a complete failure to deliver anything good after 30 minutes in.
I do understand not all movies should untangle the story somehow and straighten out the plot but with so many low budget movies actually keeping you entertained, this one is just dull and repetitive. This is all just wrong. OK, I get it that the kid screams (not a spoiler, it's in the trailer), I get that they can't leave (not a spoiler, it's on the cover), I get that there's something weird happening (obviously) but it seems that with all this repetition of pointless events like driving around, digging, screaming etc. there's no time in the movie to actually develop the characters, find out what the deal is and maybe come to a meaningful end.
I really have no idea how Jesse Eisenberg said yes to playing a role this pile of compost.
Star Trek: Picard (2020)
I like it!
Seriously, if you're a fan of Star Trek and you've always wanted to see how the story progresses, this is the show for you. We can't go with nostalgia, we have to realize that time has passed and there's a new story unfolding.
Unlike another Star Trek TV show we can look into Patrick Stewart's eyes and see Jean-Luc is still there and is about to take all of us once again where no man has gone before.
Thanks for bringing Star Trek back! It was about time!
Star Wars: Episode IX - The Rise of Skywalker (2019)
This is all our fault!
I am sorry to say it but this, all of this, is our fault. All the sequels, all the bad writing, all the controversial casting, all the millennial agenda... All of us, Star Wars fans, allowed this to happen. They fed us garbage every time and we just kept eating it. We just kept giving Disney money for more garbage to be thrown at us and we deserved all of this.
The movie was clearly written, produced and shot by people who disregarded the original material, however decided to keep the title and pay some of the original actors to come back.
In this move we watch more needless deaths, main villain somehow reappearing out of nowhere, broken and unfinished plots, and finally the obvious happening.
The sad part is that Disney ruined it and we just paid them to do it.
Joker (2019)
A painfully thorough diagnosis
Finally we get a Joker who is not Batman-centered, a Joker who walks his own path and tells his own story. Thank you!
This is the best 2019 movie to hit theaters and it will stay in the minds everyone who watched for a long time whether you liked or disliked it.
It's not a movie for the critics' praise, rather than a medical diagnosis of our time. Should you fail to notice the message Joker brings, you might as well surround yourself with happy thoughts and watch a Disney movie.
Annihilation (2018)
Someone tried to reinvent the genre and it didn't work
So, they just sent in a team with no protective gear or vehicles into an unknown anomaly...
Never mind, lets move on. The movie is just slow and uninteresting. Characters try to explain what's happening through dialogue as if we can't get it.
Portman's performance is that of a sidelined muppet.
The decisions that the super professional team makes throughout the movie are the exact opposite of what a rational person would consider.
The ending simply explains why a sequel should never be made.
Who Is America? (2018)
Epic!
On a continent not so far away, in a society by propaganda...
A show uncovering the face of a nation that a lot of people dare not speak about. The truth is sometimes funny but at the end of the day we have to accept who we are to make the change. Thank you Sacha for keeping it real (and funny)! Buyakasha!
The Fate of the Furious (2017)
Welcome to the Marvel Universe, Dom
Watched this movie twice and I really tried to make something out of it but to no success. So, the main character is enjoying a life of passion and danger when a blond woman appears and makes him take on a secret assignment high risk job where he becomes the villain but comes out on top in the end... Come on, Vin, yon can do much better than that and you can also do this in one movie a year instead of two. I really need to see a movie about cars, races and the boys being boys just like it was in the good old days. 2001 wasn't that long ago and the first movie in the franchise will remain a classic. What we got in 2017 was an ugly patchwork of the worst Bond movies, Bollywood car stunts, bad CGI and awkward clichés. I give this one 2/10 instead of 0/10 for the baby scene on the plane at the end of the movie.
Alien: Covenant (2017)
Excellent Movie
Alien story unfolds and it keeps you on the edge of your seat. Waiting for this movie to hit theaters seemed like forever and I really enjoyed it for what it is - Giger style, space horror, expressive, powerful, graphic and dark. I could probably write a really long explanation about space ship quarantine, visiting a new world without a special pressurized suit and all but if those guys from Star Trek did not need explanations for it so why should Ridley Scott spend valuable screen time on this. I really liked how possible length issues were solved with releasing parts of the movie on the web and this really helped stitch the story together and make the plot complete rather than having to wait for another cut to come out in time. Although predictable at times, the movie did not ruin the scare and it was more believable than Prometheus. Don't wait for the DVD version! Go and see it while it's hot! If you still didn't like it after seeing it then maybe Marvel is your thing. 8 out of 10! Can't wait to see what the next one is about.
The Comedian (2016)
You just don't skip this one
No, no, no! You don't skip this one! This movie is a litmus test for whether you have some sense of humor or not. It's that simple. A comedian that's never been too popular unscripted, a daddy's girl with an attitude, and an obsessive father... This movie would have been taken way too seriously if it weren't for good comedy and punchy humor!
xXx: Return of Xander Cage (2017)
Thank you, Donnie Yen!
I am giving this movie a 2 out of 10 only because Donnie Yen was in it. Otherwise this would be a 0/10 score.
Let me start with the good stuff. First of all, it's about a character we already know - a mysterious outlaw who's also into saving the world every now and again. Second, good stunts. Third, no thinking required.
Moving on to the bad and the ugly. The plot is just pathetic. The characters are superficial and uninteresting. I am a die hard Die Hard fan and, honestly, watching this felt like dying hard with cancer inside a bombed middle eastern hospital. Who were all these people? Nina Dobrev's acting was so bad that I needed to talk to a doctor after the credits. I seriously wanted to ask if there was a doctor in the theater. The editors could have easily taken out all scenes with her and no one would have noticed. I am waiting for a DVD release without her. Deepika Padukone looks amazing but her skills on the set were just not present. Michael Bisping? Really?
Vin Diesel. It's always good to have Vin Diesel in a movie except not in this particular movie. Riddick stories were good, Fast and Furious franchise is good (the first parts), Knockaround Guys was really good...
All right, watch this movie on cable. It's just not worth walking into the theater even if it was free. It's just too much effort and disappointment.
P.S. Punching a toilet through the bottom of a military plane?
Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)
The darkest Batman movie so far...
First of all, it's a superhero movie. Remember that! Even in comic books the plot, origins of characters, costumes and stories have been twisted and changed more than once, so don't get too fussy about what you've read before and what you've seen in other movies compared to this one. And, who wants to see the comic book story re- done page by page as a movie.
The characters:
Ben Affleck's Batman: No one thought Michael Keaton would be good as the Bat of Gotham after being cast in comedy roles before that. Fans were disappointed back then at first and I can hear the same type of people voting against Ben. You know what, I liked Ben's representation and I think he did a great job!
Lex: Not your typical representation of Superman's toughest opponent but you have to start from somewhere. Lex's beginning and character are shown as "in the making". His character has still to catch up with what we are familiar with. So let's give it some time.
Superman: Nothing much to say or add. I think he still wants to become a real boy but his superpowers are way too much to handle.
I will just stop here and say to all the boys and girls who found a reason not to like the movie: - Love it or hate it, this is the movie that marks the beginning of an amazing journey through a dark multiverse of super powers and deadly adventures with unexpected plot twists that you've probably not read of in the comic books in the way they will appear on screen. You will get some humor when the rest of the characters get introduced (probably).
I would watch it again more than once because I want to see every Easter egg and every detail.
Now go see it!
Fast & Furious 7 (2015)
Was there a script?
So, the gang is back and going faster and more furious than before! That's basically it!
I don't really know what they were thinking while writing the script but it is really awful and thanks to the circumstances Paul Walker will not be appearing in any of the following furious disasters.
I have seen worse movies but this one is a bad movie with a huge budget and no plot.
Without saying anything bad about the actors, there is something about the movie that just seems really wrong. They just make every stunt performed look way too easy and going in and out of a foreign country is just a breeze. Authorities are absolutely clueless most of the time and just let the good and bad guys shoot each other and drive off. Gravity is a thing for people with normal jobs and why drive on streets while you can simply hit it and fly over.
I am definitely not recommending this title to anyone. Skip this movie if you can.
Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) (2014)
A movie not about superheroes. A movie about life and fighting your dreams.
Before seeing the movie I'd watched all of Keaton's interviews about it on YouTube and I have to say I saw an actor pleased with his part and acting. It wasn't just about the nominations and prizes. It was about doing something meaningful.
I liked the idea of actually fighting our dreams and figuring out our own way of doing things, and how our lives are all beset by regret and lack of support until we actually come to peace with ourselves.
Keaton's performance is amazing and he took the role at the right moment. He was a favorite when I was young and watching Batman and now, after I grew older, he is still there not the comedian, not the superhero, but the person on screen I can relate to.
If you like superhero movies and CGI then don't watch it. This movie is not a part of the Avengers franchise and will never be. It's never coming down to that level.
Enjoy it, cry if you need to, laugh if you can but you will find yourself at some point.