Reviews

There are so many shows today about a group of young people who are "gifted" who go out and fight evil. By now, it's basically a trope. However, "Cracow Monsters" puts a fresh spin on it by keeping the pace pretty quick, giving us interesting characters, and introducing Americans to Slavic mythology.

The acting, cinematography, and writing are all quite good here. I'd highly recommend this show to anyone who likes this genre. This one's definitely worth your time, and you'll love the actors!

I love Swedish movies. Going all the way back to the masterpieces of Ingmar Bergman in the golden age of foreign cinema, to more recent gems by Lars Von Trier; Greta Garbo to Alicia Vikander. Unlike any of the films made by the aforementioned master directors, "Black Crab" is just a lousy movie. Yes, Noomi Rapace is cool! However, to save an entire movie is something she cannot do.

"Black Crab" is poorly written, features two-dimensional characters (why do I care about any of these people(?)), and has a giant military surplus of hilariously far-fetched events -- each one more outrageous than the next. If this were some sort of action comedy, that'd be fine, but it's meant to be taken seriously. Sadly, I don't know how anyone could! The premise alone -- which is conveniently left out of the description -- is ridiculous enough. Pour on some cloying CGI syrup, some bad actors, and worse writing, and you've got another lame action movie that you'll forget you ever saw weeks from now.

Thus, I'll say the old worn-out and sad reviewer's saying; I wanted to like this movie. I really did. "Svart Krabbe"? More like "Svart Ingeting"!

I love Sweden, I love it's actors, I love it's people, and it's vast, beautiful landscape. Nearly everything about the place is appealing to me -- including many of its great films, directors, and stars. Unfortunately, "Black Crab" showcases none of these things, nor does it ever capture the imagination or make you think any deeper than a puddle atop a frozen lake. Sad to say, honestly.

This movie is painful to watch. It's not the actors or acting though. A big part of it is that it doesn't feel like a story, but also because it feels so constipated; it's just so forced. Another issue is that so much of the content is CGI, whereas the original was chock full of real actors doing live action sequences. Additionally, the cinematography is just plain bad; there isn't a continuous shot in the entire film lasting more than mere seconds. Finally, "Resurrections" just looks weird, which is likely attributed to all the CGI, as there are so few real settings and set pieces. Everything right down to the coloration just feels (or looks) strange, and not in a good way.

Sure, maybe if you were born post-2000 and don't remember when the internet was new -- dial-up modems and desktop computers. Because of the original audience's familiarity with these things, the original film completely blew the minds of older Millennials and Gen-X. So if you're younger, I could understand why you'd enjoy this, and that's be fine if you do!

However, for the folks who saw "The Matrix" in the summer of 1999 like I did -- and were totally enamored with and smitten by its cyberpunk charm and amazing story -- this new iteration likely just won't cut it for you. I don't take any pleasure in writing a scathing review of a franchise I like, but I can't lie. This movie, just like so many other new movies, is junk, and it's sad.

It is beyond my imagination how much of a conceited hipster you'd have to be to give this movie a 10 out of 10. "Frownland" is like sewage that's been distilled into something worse -- like the jenkem of cinema. If you're a total masochist you might enjoy this.

Strange as it may seem, I really was trying to get into this 'film'. I understand what it is trying to show me and how it wants to show it, but I hate it. At every corner it just turns you off and makes you feel sick (almost literally). The cinematography makes it even more difficult to watch, unless you enjoy unnecessarily close and shaking camera shots throughout a 106-minute film. There's really not much else to say. This movie is awful.

The best horror movie I've seen so far this year. The talent in Julia Sara Stone's acting was refreshing; she can say so much without uttering a single word. Although I doubt I'd watch this film multiple times, the many wonderous scenes and images which stuck in my head after watching "Come True" will surely stick with me for years to come -- a fantastic 'slow burn' thriller-horror with a stellar lead.

Foolish, mind-blowing-ly awful garbage packaged as a horror movie. Rarely do I ever come across movies that actually make me angry after watching them, but this one...just...wow. It's amazing that this sort of crap gets a green light and ends up being made in the first place.

I've been a fan of Mads Mikkelson for a long time. I remember seeing him in Danish movies years ago. So when I heard he'd done three seasons in a show as Dr. Hannibal Lecter, I figured I was in for a treat.

For the most part, I absolutely loved this show. There were a few hangups, but they were easily surpassed by what I was seeing. This show is a visual masterpiece; it's serious eye candy! The main thing I didn't like were in the character of Will Graham, although overall he was good. Additionally, I felt like the storyline of the first season relied too heavily on what was happening at the FBI, gory crime scenes, etc. and not enough emphasis was put on Hannibal -- afterall, they did name the show after him!

If you're a fan of 1993's "Silence of the Lambs" or 2000's "Hannibal", then chances are you are going to love this series. I just would've done a few things differently if I'd written the show, mainly focusing more on Hannibal and less on the supporting characters.

Well I really must go now, as I'm having an old friend for dinner.

This movie is an unimaginative gore-fest. Everything about it is cliché and it does nothing more than turn your stomach. I watched the entire thing, and I wished I hadn't. Not at any time did I feel entertained or interested in what was going to happened. You can see the entire plot unfold in your mind right after the sixth or seventh scene. This is trash horror. Just because there are some really cute actresses in it doesn't make it any better, nor does one decent idea (it has both). Also, take note that this review is coming from someone who's seen HUNDREDS of horror movies. It may not be a one-star movie, but it's still rubbish.

You can look deeper into the symbolism here and all that, which is fine and fun but on the surface, "Horse Girl" is simply a phenomenal sci-fi film. Talented, beautiful, and -- most importantly -- believable, Alison Brie is amazing in the role of Sarah.

If you like intense, deep, and dramatic (not soapy) science fiction, then you're going to love this. I most certainly did. I've been posting reviews on iMDB for years, and I think I've given a score of 9 to about half a dozen films. This film is EXCELLENT; strong characters, good acting, sharp cinematography, and a great score make this my #1 film of 2020 so far.

This film looks great, the sound is very solid, and the set pieces helped add a nice atmosphere, and most of all, Taissa Farmiga's acting was excellent. These traits couldn't save it from poor execution though, and it's just not a movie I'd recommend to anyone aside from the most dedicated fans of the "Insidious" saga. Although the beginning is pretty strong, the predictability of the story and how it unfolds is just awful. Before anything happens, you see it coming a mile away. Jump scares are used to a fault. The CGI castle-convent looks very silly in some scenes, and since this is supposed to take place in the real world, it's not a believable locale.

On that subject, the fact that they chose to have the film take place in Romania was a cool idea (if not very unoriginal), but the execution was awful in that respect. They went out of their way to go to Romania, yet they did not cast a single Romanian, and nothing in the film took advantage of the natural beauty of the country. Almost the entire film takes place in a fairly small set with no dynamics - it's all forcefully dark and dreary, and in a very fake way. Romania is a beautiful country, and they blew a great opportunity to showcase some beautiful architecture and countryside.

To make the long review just a little longer, this movie was a big disappointment. The demonic nun in the painting in the previous film "Insidious: The Last Key" (?) was scary. That character could've been used to great effect in combination with the naturally mysterious and enchanting backdrop of Romania, but it wasn't. Even Taissa Farmiga's stunning beauty and talent as an actor couldn't save this film from a total lack of visual dynamics, good supporting actors, a decent setting, and most of all, creativity.

This one's not bad but it's not great either. I found it to be lackluster in the thrill department. It just didn't hold my attention like a horror movie should. Redeeming aspects are the decent acting, and most of all the cinematography was solid. It's a decent enough flick, but it pales in comparison to the original film as well as the remake and other spin-offs that have used the same formula.

Ridiculous, disgusting, unlikely, reprehensible, and with very few redeeming qualities. Perhaps the most frustrating aspect is the actions of the two lead characters. Horror movies typically push the boundaries of what people do in real life, which makes them fun. However, "The Perfection" doesn't take place at Crystal Lake. What the two leads do over the course of this film is so far beyond even the most mentally disturbed people's actions, and it leads to way too many head-scratching and forehead-slapping moments.

Cinematography is solid, I'll give it that. Sound and foley art is solid as well, and although there are some great cello pieces in it, for a movie about music, the soundtrack is sadly forgettable. A recurring melody or musical theme would've been a fitting choice, but nothing really sticks out.

It cant be overstated that the use of gross-out tactics here is at maximum. There's a disturbing amount of body fluids flying around early on, and it's way past what is necessary to get the point across. Additionally, it's frustrating how many stereotypes are on display here, and the virtue-signalling is in full force. When I watch movies (aside from documentaries), I want to be entertained; I don't want a lesson on sociopolitical issues or have agendas pushed on me.

Like many of Netflix's horror-thrillers, this one is just crappy...and in more ways than one. Not surprisingly, there are many reviews here giving it ratings as high as 9 and 10 stars. It's not a 1-star movie either, but in short, I just can't recommend it. It's cliché to say, but I'll say it anyway; I wanted to like this movie. Save your time find something instead this virtue-signaling, stereotype-perpetuating, and wholly idiotic mess.

Stilted acting, a dragging story, plot holes, American clichés - this crapshoot has it all. When I saw the two actors were walking through the garden and talking in one of the opening scenes, I knew I was in for a rough ride. It was like they were acting for the first time; no real emotional content in their words, and with poor reaction timing to one another's lines to boot. I gave this movie a chance based on the positive review left by the only other user review here, but I was utterly disappointed, and frankly disgusted by what I saw. "All That We Destroy" very nearly encompasses all that we hate about modern film.

The entire "Into the Dark" series has been one vanilla movie after another, but this one hits a new low. It is completely devoid of the horror aspect, unlike others in the series - this is a thriller with mild gore, NOT a horror film. After 70 minutes of dragging its feet through a painfully boring parade of mediocre acting and bland scenery, "All That We Destroy" picks up just in time to finish 10 mintues later with one of those 'Look! See? We're making a point here!' type endings.

If you've ever read the book or seen "Trainspotting" the film, you know that it gives an unfiltered look at what heroin addiction is and its effect on people, all through the eyes of the main character Mark Renton. In a very similar fashion, "The Party's Just Beginning" gives you a glimpse into the hellish world of depression.

Karen Gillan did an amazing job writing and directing this film, which is especially surprising (and awesome) because it's her first. As a directorial debut it's a hit, but even from a seasoned director this would easily be a winner. Like any film that deals with such a specific and supremely dark subject matter (and being so bleak as it is), it's certainly not going to win everybody's heart. However it's that bleakness that Karen managed to capture which really resonated with me, and is portrayed so well, both in the film's characters and its substance.

In fairness, I must admit to some bias, as I've always found Karen gobsmackingly beautiful. With that said, if you've ever struggled with depression, this is likely to resonate with you. And if you're like me, it's going to leave you crying and writing good reviews. Finally worth mentioning is that the last film I gave a 9/10 to was "Pulp Fiction"; indeed, I liked it that much, and I can't say enough good things about it.

I 'get' what this film tries to do, I just don't like it. Someone was quoted as saying it could stand alongside David Lynch's 'Lost Highway', but I disagree. The term 'Lovecraftian' has been used many times in recent years to describe many films, but few truly are. 'The Ghoul' is most definitely Lovecraftian, and it has some excellent aspects; the acting is solid, as is the cinematography. The story leaves a lot to be desired however, and as I mentioned, I 'get' it, but I don't like it.

This film is disjointed and awkward in its flow, which was likely intentional, however it doesn't serve the film. In the end it left much to be desired. In the beginning you're loving it, in the middle you're excited to see where it's going, but by the last bit you're saying, "This can't really be it, can it?!" All in all, this film absolutely has the feel and look of a Lynch-made masterpiece, but almost none of the substance and (dare I say) the dazzle of one such as 'Lost Highway' - to which it's been compared.

On the one hand, I loved (really loved) how it portrays a depressed man in such a gritty and realistic way. But on the other hand, it felt lacking and failed to climax into anything that's anywhere near greatness. Not a complete waste of time, and it may very well be enjoyed by some, but for me this fell far short of my initial expectations which the opening scenes gave rise to - 6 out of 10.

It's important I admit that I'm a huge fan of Saoirse Ronan, and therefore I have a strong bias towards anything she's in; she's beautiful and incredibly talented at playing any part which she takes on. However, this film just didn't do it for me. I feel like the number one reason why is because of a lack of character development. We don't get to know these characters nearly enough to become emotionally invested in their fates, and I feel that's important in a story about love.

Secondly, the improbability of the way in which the events unfold had me rolling my eyes a couple of times. I suppose I'm being a little harsh, but most of Saoirse's films are so "edgy", and this one just isn't. That's okay, but it's not for me. If you're in the mood for a story about being young and in love - the pain, the awkwardness, and the hopeful desperation - then you'll probably enjoy this. It's far from being bad. With all of that said, it just didn't dig deep enough for me.

Many amateur and wannabe filmmakers these days are making possession movies and movies based on the found footage premise; this melds the two together in a "sandwich au merde". Some of them are okay, most are bad, some are awful. This one's awful. It takes the basic premises of "The Exorcist" and "Paranormal Activity", removes all of what made those movies good, and retains the leftovers. This one has every cliché of a film in its genre, except it executes them in a way which leaves you frustrated as hell, and swearing like an angry Frenchman.

After seeing the trailer, I was hoping that Sacrifice would be sort of like a new-age take on The Wicker Man (the original, which is a masterpiece), or something along those lines. What I got was far from anything I'd call horror, and even as a drama-thriller it failed at nearly every cinematic bastion to hold my attention.

Absolutely nothing about this movie was interesting, surprising, or shocking, and was the opposite of entertaining. The acting was painfully bland, the cinematography fails to bring subjects to light, and despite being on a picturesque Scottish isle, the settings are boring.

In fact, the one word which could sum this entire movie up would be "boring". If you're like me and watch lots of horror and thriller movies, you've seen this movie before and all of the predictable clichés in it. Skip it and save your time.

"Velvet Buzzsaw" has all the right ingredients for a good horror movie; great visuals, convincing and famous actors, good cinematography, and even a pretty original concept-paintings that kill people. However, good ingredients are just one of the elements that make up a good film, and to extend the metaphor a bit, this film feels under-cooked. It takes this really neat concept and does nothing at all with it. We're shown a glimpse into this grimy world of the art business, yet it never actually makes one think deeply or scares you; it just lingers on and fizzles out.

Alas, I believe I'm sounding quite like one of those art critics myself. This movie will go down in the heap of titles which Netflix has bought-up wholesale in order to save their dying company. It's sad to think that-perhaps with more time and different people involved-this could've been something good, and not a waste of everyone's time. With a few cool moments aside, and even with some John Malkovich to help things along, this film's colors bleed to brown.

This is the pinnacle of bad moviemaking. This "documentary" doesn't possess a single redeeming quality; it is pure, unadulterated garbage. Zak Bagans is like a lousy P.T. Barnum - who famously said, "A sucker is born every minute."

Bored on a Saturday evening, I watched this alone. I'm glad I did, because anyone who happened to be in the room might question my sanity for watching it. Because I was alone, I was able to yell at the TV, which I found myself doing almost constantly. It was so frustrating watching Zak pile BS on top of BS while fabricating this awful story. It's not scary, it's not entertaining, it's just garbage.

There are simply far too many follies and foibles in this throw-away "documentary" to list. If it wouldn't be such a ridiculous waste of time, one could easily make a film about how bad this "film" is, as it is rife with fakery and connivance. Watch anything else. Even the worst 80's B-movie is better than this. Zak Bagans Is a con artist and a charlatan of the most despicable type. Don't watch this movie because it'll just feed his enormous, fetid ego. This junk has brought the horror genre to new lows.

This movie starts out promising, especially with some great design choices, but by end it's just a wreck. There's this underlying, dark theme of how the holidays can be an ugly time of year, but this theme is so blatantly obvious, and with such a lack of resolve, it just doesn't flesh out as interesting (and certainly not entertaining). Without a doubt, it falls into the category of movies that could've been great.

Every good movie needs a story with a beginning, a middle and an end. However, "Pooka" doesn't really have any of those. It feels rushed, and by the end it's just a mess. With such a strong beginning and an awesome monster design, this could've been a really good Christmas-horror movie, but it falls flat on its face. For the first half, it's quite good and will intrigue most horror fans (just enough to continue watching it). Sadly, by the time credits roll, you're likely to feel nothing more than utter frustration.

I have personally blacklisted Eli Roth for this travesty. Two young girls invade a married man's home, seduce him against his will, and things just go nowhere. Truly, there is nothing to this movie at all. You're never really routing for anyone; there's no background or proper setup for any of the three main characters. Additionally, the improbable circumstances just pile up higher and higher. This isn't even a movie, it's more like a feminist's wet dream - seeing a hapless good man go bad at the hands of two girls. The cap goes on the feminist jar when one of them says, "You're all the same." Eli, you disgust me. "Hostel" was just shy of a snuff film, and this is just sick; it has no place in modern cinema. Eli Roth must be one really messed up person to have come up with this, and then spend millions making it. To twist the knife, he made a lot of money off of this crapshoot too. Avoid it like the plague!

Well I read the bad reviews as I often do, but this time I threw caution to the wind, and wow did I pay the price! I'm now sitting here with less than an bour left in my Sunday night, having just seen one of the worst movies I've seen all year - no exaggerstion. I watch and review LOTS of horror movies, and this is up (or down) there with the worst of them on that big pile of the neo-horror paranormal ghost movie rubbish heap.

"The Sound" has too many shotfalls to count. The other reviewers, from both users and journalists, have covered all the bases already. A ghost-busting Rose MacGowan goes into a deserted subway station to investigate paranormal activity, and if you didn't see it coming a mile away, not all is what it seems. MacGowan has aged visibly - with evidence of her plastic surgery so clear it's pointless she even had it - and that wouldn't be such an easy shot if her acting wasn't just as deteriorated as her visage. Mind you, it's tough for me to tear into an actress who I once liked so much. This movie, however, is her rock bottom.

You may ask yourself why I'd choose to write so much about Rose when reviewing this movie, but "The Sound" is over 90mins of her walking around aimlessly in a subway station and tweeting to her character's followers; barely anything else happens. Her character's husband, in the few scenes he has, manages to be the least convincing "worried spouse" I've seen in anything outside the anus (not annals) of B-movies. The man's acting is just awful, and I'm not even going to bother looking his name up.

The amount of filler here is criminal, and much of it in the first half is made up of main character Kelly's tweets popping up on the screen - ridiculous hashtags and all. I suppose this wouldn't be so bad if there was a compelling plot, or if the story itself made you like Kelly, but it doesn't. I don't even want to know what these filmmakers were thinking when they came up with this drain scumtrap of a script. You'd think a movie called "The Sound" would have a good soundtrack, but it doesn't even have a score, just some mediocre foley "art" and some bad sound effects. Moths backed with the sound of bees - I couldn't make sound effects so bad if I tried!

While many bad horror movies in this genre have at least one redeeming quality, but "The Sound" is devoid of anything even resembling entertainment; you can't say you weren't warned.

While "Pyewacket" is somewhat reminiscent of "The Craft", it's without the beautilful and talented actress Fairuza Balk - or a lead as strong as her. Emotional investment in a film's main characters is very important, especially in a sparse movie like this, but in "Pyewacket", there's nobody to care about. It is strong in the beginning, and the concept is solid; however (sadly), both the overall execution and especially the ending leave SO MUCH to be desired. Sure, it has its merits, but all are overshadowed by the terribly rushed plot, lack of a likeable protagonist, and (again), a lousy ending which leaves the viewer feeling short-changed.

The 2016 Irish film "A Dark Song" does the occult ritual horror movie in a far, far more thrilling and visceral style, and I would recommend that over this a hundred-fold. Or perhaps if you want a really good "teenage scare" type of horror movie, see "Lake Mungo", which is likely to actually scare you. Regardless of which you choose, do not waste your time or money on this junk.

I watch horror movies several nights per week. I've seen loads of horror movies, and this is undoubtedly one of the worst I've seen (out of at least 15) in the last 30 days. Additionally, I don't go around IMDb posting highly subjective reviews with ridiculously high or low scores. Since I paid to see this one, and therefore wanted to enjoy it more than something I'd see on a streaming service like Netflix.

Like a drunken stepfather, you'll get nothing but empty promises from the trailer and description of "Pyewacket". Don't say that this very horror-savvy reviewer didnt warn you!

"Hero" is a visually stunning film which tells a wonderful story. It is centered around three men-a swordsman, an emperor, and a calligrapher-who are incredibly passionate and driven. All of the main characters, including the supporting female roles, are easy to relate to. Although the story is slow-paced and projects an air of calm, it has this certain sense of urgency that will never leave you feeling bored. In this way it's unlike-and maybe even the polar opposite of-every kung fu movie I've ever seen.

I was told Hero was the most expensive movie China had ever made (at that time), and in this case, the money went to good use. With its superb direction, cinematography, and soundtrack, this film will certainly stick out among the typically fast-paced, action-heavy films from China.

One thing that will stand out about this film is its use of color, which many of its reviewers rightfully praised. Without spoiling anything, how color is used to tell this story is both visually beautiful and psychologically intriguing. Combined with its incredible soundtrack, it will very likely have artistically-inclined viewers agape and speechless. In the very least, "Hero" is a feast for the senses-like a fireworks show of color and sound. At its best, it is a wonderful story about nationalism, self-examination, and love which is told in an unusually beautiful fashion.

As many will tell you, if you liked "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon", you're likely to enjoy this just as much-especially if you liked the quieter, more introspective scenes in that film. Because there is so little to compare it to, "Hero" is a difficult film to review. However, that only gives you another reason to give it a chance. And finally, it must be said that this is Jet Li at his very best.