Complete and utter Crap. I wasted my life on this crap, because of this movie I almost died. I was seventeen then in a much simpler time and place. It was the summer of 06 and, life was pretty good. Until Blockbuster......stained my life forever. As I watched the movie I began to sweat, and sweat, and sweat. My veins were pumping my blood, I diddn't know what was going on in my life. Was this death? Was this that feeling of death people talk about so much? Halfway through the movie, I woke up with a razor in my hand. Was I in a deep coma? What was this? I began to slit my wrists uncontrollably. What was going on? I finally got myself to stop. I had lost 2 pints of blood. I don't know why, but this movie mesmerized me. After the movie was over, I began a long addiction of cocaine. Months after, the lining of my nose was destroyed. I diddn't know how to stop. Then I got the idea. I must kill Jennifer Lopez and destroy blockbuster. I devised a plan. I must take out Lopez first. I loaded my speargun and went to Hollywood. Finally I faced her face to face. I fired my weapon, the spear went through her abdomen. She cried as the blood was spewing from her body. I leered over her, pulled out my trusty old pocket knife and gutted her body. Phase one was complete. Now I had to return home to get revenge on Blockbuster. Fools, diddn't know what was coming to them. I knew they had a small army of re-winders, managers, and janitors ready to give their lives for blockbuster. This was a jiahd to them. So I had to amass a army. I went to the local video store, Hollywood Video. They agreed to aid me upon my quest. "WE STRIKE AT DAWN" I cried.
It was 8:08 in the morning. It was time for battle. I watched the red sun rise.....it was a black omen onto the blood shed that was about to occour. We held up our pick axes and our pitch forks and charged into the store. However, many of my people were mowed down upon entering by the Blockbuster fools. "I must find the heart", I said to myself. I went deeper into the lair and found the porno section. "Fools" I cried. I took a five minute break to relax my sexual organs. After that, I reached the generator room. I took my good grenade and placed it upon the generator. I got out just in time just as the store exploded. The government knew of my conspiracies. However I type this message now, to warn you all......DO NOT WATCH THIS MOVIE! IT WILL CHANGE YOU......forever.
It was 8:08 in the morning. It was time for battle. I watched the red sun rise.....it was a black omen onto the blood shed that was about to occour. We held up our pick axes and our pitch forks and charged into the store. However, many of my people were mowed down upon entering by the Blockbuster fools. "I must find the heart", I said to myself. I went deeper into the lair and found the porno section. "Fools" I cried. I took a five minute break to relax my sexual organs. After that, I reached the generator room. I took my good grenade and placed it upon the generator. I got out just in time just as the store exploded. The government knew of my conspiracies. However I type this message now, to warn you all......DO NOT WATCH THIS MOVIE! IT WILL CHANGE YOU......forever.
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