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Reviews
Diary of a Mad Black Woman (2005)
Enjoyable melodrama with welcomed comedic turrets
"Diary of a Mad Black Woman" is a drama with comedic turrets syndrome. One suspects that with a little more tweaking of the screenplay, the multiple genre's Tyler Perry tries to stuff into the story might have turned out to be cohesive and well-weaved. Instead, the stage-to-screen adaptation has trouble with the transitions from drama to comedy and succeeds more with one genre than the other. This film is the product of "Waiting to Exhale" and "The Nutty Professor" had the two engaged in a form of cinematic sex, but luckily for "Diary of a Mad Black Woman", both of its parental films were enjoyable, which is what "Diary", in the end, becomes.
The story begins with the narration of Helen (Elise), who tells us that her marriage is not all that it seems to be from the outside. Her husband, Charles McCarter (Harris), is awarded Atlanta's attorney of the year and addresses his wife in a speech he gives at a banquet hall, "I could not have done any of this without my wife of eighteen years." Helen smiles and blows her thoughtful husband a kiss. After the ceremony, we get a glimpse of why Helen had informed the audience that her marriage was just a sham. Her husband is verbally abusive and urges her to get out of the car because he has to "go back to the office and get some things". Helen, proving to not only be a mad black woman, but also a smart one, asks him, "Who is she?" He doesn't answer, snarls some hurtful dialogue, and takes off.
The very next day, or so we're left to believe, Charles has a U-Haul truck parked outside of their mansion that is filled with all of Helen's things. Helen is puzzled and darts into her home, only to find new, designer dresses occupying her closet. Perhaps not so smart this time around, Helen assumes the new wardrobe to be her anniversary present from Charles. Dressed in a new gown, Helen greets her husband, who brings home a rather obscure anniversary present another woman. He informs Helen that he has moved her things out of the house because he wants a divorce. This escalates into a yelling match and results in Charles dragging (literally) Helen out of the house and leaving her outside to be driven away by the U-haul truck (driven by Orlando who is played by "The Young and the Restless's" Shemar Moore).
With no where to turn, Helen decides to go back to her hometown, where we are introduced to Aunt Madea and Brian, two senior citizen siblings, who look to be in their 80's, but move as if they're in their 30's. Tyler Perry, who gives them distinct enough personalities that the two are rarely ever confused as being cheap imitations of each other, plays these two characters with a contagious energy. When Helen decides to reside with her Aunt until she gets back on her feet, she becomes subjected to Aunt Madea's lessons of life, which almost always involve a handgun or a chainsaw.
From the moment Helen sets foot into Aunt Madea's house, the story becomes familiar. Living amongst her relatives, reuniting with her roots, Helen learns how to be a strong, independent black woman, open and closed to the idea of forming a relationship with Shemar Moore's character. She learns how to release her rage in a rather uproarious scene that allows Aunt Madea to wield a chainsaw around like a distant relative of Leatherface, and she learns how to contain it through forgiveness. The rest of the film is about Helen's struggle to accept Orlando as the nice guy he is and not the pig-of-a-man she thinks he might be when her back is turned, her ex-husband getting his just deserts, and a rather tacked on subplot of Helen's junkie cousin seeking rehab.
When "Diary of a Mad Black Woman" is funny, it's funny. Madea, looking like Ru Paul in even more drag, provides the film with much of the film's comedic moments. Some critics are deeming her as a completely out of place character, but she isn't. Without the character of Madea, the film would be left in a puddle of melodrama. The fact that Madea is played by Tyler Perry can be a distraction, but it's an amusing one, and often funny. And if indeed the character of Medea doesn't fit, and I'm wrong, than at least her character delivers some quality distractions from the film's dramatic elements that are nearly always a hit-and-miss.
As I mentioned before, "Diary" has one genre that works (comedy) and one that doesn't (drama). I'm not sure if Shemar Moore cursed the production with his "The Young and the Restless" soap opera acting talent, but when the film chooses to be sentimental, it all feels so soapy. When Kimberly Elise and Shemar Moore's characters are dancing, he whispers, "This feels like a fairy tale" into her ear. And, he's partially right, but what would be more correct is that it all read like a fairy tale too. Also, there is a scene towards the film's finale, where every character, all at once, come into their own and change for the better while at church. "Diary of a Mad Black Woman" takes the conventional happy ending and feeds it until it becomes so bloated with convenient closure, that it all seems forced.
When walking into "Diary of a Mad Black Woman", I had no idea what I was in for. The trailers for the film had made it look like an all-out, "Big Mama's House" type of comedy, but it was nothing of the sort. The problem with "Diary" is that it focuses on the wrong genre drama. I think, had the film focused on the comedic elements of the story, turning the entire ordeal into a black comedy (no pun intended), this film would have worked a lot better.
Constantine (2005)
Like the film's title character, "Constantine" is in limbo; it's not a good movie and it's not a bad one.
Like the film's title character, "Constantine" is in limbo; it's not a good movie and it's not a bad one. Instead, "Constantine" remains tediously in between what could of made it good and what could of made it horrible, resulting in an uneven, half-baked motion picture that has its moments, just not enough of them to construct an overall success.
The story, based on a series of graphic novels ("Hellblazer"), follows John Constantine, a super natural "private eye" so to speak, and his quest to gain access into heaven through his extermination of demons. Born with this curse (or "gift" as the archangel Gabriel puts it) of seeing past the earthly guises of angels and demons, Constantine seeks God's redemption, after attempting to commit the ultimate Catholic no-no of suicide back in his days of youth. Along the way, Detective Angela Dodson (Rachel Weisz) seeks Constantine's help in unraveling the mystery behind her twin-sister's alleged suicide, embarking the two on a journey into a too-close-to-home war between heaven and hell.
John Constantine himself, at least as portrayed in the theatrical version, isn't a very interesting character to behold. His situation is intriguing, his weaponry neat to look at, but ultimately, Constantine comes off as being your typical action-hero, lacking personality, intelligent dialogue, and the basic necessities needed to create a fully dimensional and watchable protagonist. It's hard to say whether this is the fault of the script or the casting of Keanu Reeves, but in any case, the performance can become a bit of a bore. Rachel Weisz as the spiritually curious Angela Dodson is fine, as is Tilda Swinton playing the devious angel Gabriel, but I think the best performance award in this particular film goes to Peter Stomare, who plays the role of Satan quite well
the best Satanic performance since Al Pacino's in "The Devil's Advocate".
With a two hour running length, "Constantine" feels quite a bit longer than what your watch might suggest. In fact, there's a line in the movie that goes a little something like, "I was dead for two minutes
two minutes in hell can feel like a lifetime." Now, I'm not going to say that "Constantine" was a hellish experience (although on a literal level I'd be somewhat correct), but it is a bloated one. Some parts of the film test patience with dialogue sequences that do not enhance character development, but rather the story itself, which can become somewhat complicated to follow if you begin calculating all of the plot holes or if you've fallen asleep midway through (an understandable possibility). I think the film has too much plot with too little development. Luckily for "Constantine", the plot is an intriguing one. What would have worked well in this case however, would have been the focus on the character of Constantine himself and his personal dilemmas, saving the rest of the material for another movie, its sequel.
Those faults aside, "Constantine" does manage to do a few things right. I found the scenes in which Constantine exorcizes demons from human vessels to be fairly well done and tense. And, like I've mentioned before, the premise itself makes for engaging material even if that material itself is stretched a little too far. The confrontation between Constantine and Satan at the end is low key, but well executed, while the special effects are reasonably good
this is probably due to the fact that "Constantine" is such a dimly lit film, as opposed to a well-lit one, where special effects flaws would be too easy to distinguish.
Elements from John Milton's "Paradise Lost" are stolen and used in this contemporary retelling of heaven and hell's battles, as they were in "The Prophecy" as well, but the concept never gets old and is almost always interesting. With "Constantine" the battle feels modern and can be fun to watch when it's not boring you with the details. After watching "Constantine" though, it's hard to tell where its fan base lies. It doesn't have enough action in it to sustain the attention of the under 12 crowd; even though it has some frightening moments or elements rather, the horror junkies won't get their fill; and those seeking adventure will find a movie that has only outbursts of energy that is otherwise muddled by scenes of tedium. Fans of the graphic novels are the only ones I can think of who will, without a doubt love this movie, but even then, I'm unaware of how well adapted the film is because I've never read the source material.
The best thing I can say about "Constantine" is that it is interesting. It's not always fun to watch, but there are some fun scenes to be seen and at two hours long, there's only about an hours worth that comes across as worthy of the ticket price you paid for admission.