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Reviews
X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009)
Was it REALLY that bad?
I know that based on the reviews and ratings for Last Stand, this should have been INFINETLY worse, but honestly, I didn't flat out hate it. OK, I think it has some problems, but I didn't think it Completely bombed.
The acting was OK, the cinematography was serviceable and the plot was decent over all. But then, in comes what DIDN'T work. First off, the dialogue got hammy and contrived at times. When Kayla said "I love you" when Logan found her mortally wounded, I felt like that was too cliché and over the top for some reason. Then the effects looked a bit choppy in some shots, like Logan first unsheathing his claws. To me, they looked a little too CG-ish. And the background during the reactor fight kind of made it a little obvious it was green-screened. And lastly, Deadpool was NOT given the proper respect he deserved. If and when they decide to do a Deadpool solo movie, they need to go ALL OUT and just make him as crazy as all hell. Ryan Reynolds' performance was on the right track, but if they want this to work, they need to push it even further.
I don't know why I hated this film LESS than Last Stand, but maybe I'm just a sucker for prequels. Now it's time for First Class. Jennifer Lawrence as Mystique? Yeah, I think I'm in for a fun time. ^_^
X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)
The Spiderman 3 of X-Men
To prepare for Days of Future Past coming in two months, I bought EVERY SINGLE X-Men movie to watch so that I'd be up to speed for when it hits theaters. A few days ago, I just finished #3. What the actual and incontrovertible hell happened?! Now let me make it clear why I'm so angry with this film. The acting and cinematography was all well and good. When you have Sirs Stewart and Mckellan, you're ALWAYS treated to a good performance. And I felt that Jean going Gollum was an interesting way to provide tension to Logan and the overall story. But my main gripe with this film is the fact that a whole heap of characters are just taken out of the film entirely without the proper set-up or lead-in. I'm not saying killing characters off or having them leave CAN'T work. I'm saying that having Scott killed in about 10 or so minutes since the film begins is way too damn fast. But what I'm MOST upset about is the death scene for Professor X. I can sort of get what they were TRYING to do with it, maybe leave the team in a state of hopelessness so that their comeback will seem all the more better, but like Scott's death, it was done too quickly and didn't fit the pacing AT ALL. How much MORE fitting would it have been if Xaiver lived long enough to chase after Logan when he tries to convince Jean to leave Magneto and come back to him and Xaiver sacrifices himself to save him from a blow that would have killed him? It would show him how attached to Jean he's become to the point where it blinds him from keeping everyone else safe, and has now cost him their resourceful leader. When I first heard that the Professor died, I thought it would happen at the climax, or AT LEAST near the end of it, but as is, it just doesn't flow well in my opinion. And I can't believe I'm saying this, but as useless as Rouge seemed in the first two films, she was pretty much non existent in this one. I can buy that she'd be tempted to use the cure to make her normal. What I CAN'T buy is that she'd be more than willing to just up and leave the people who housed and fed her when she was virtually homeless and not show up again until AFTER the final battle. Oh yeah, the Professor's dead and Magneto's raising a mutant army to eventually take over the world, but who cares about any of THAT when I can finally touch my boyfriend without gloves? And in her place, we get Ellen Page as Kitty Pryde. No offense to her acting, I'm sure she's wonderful, but she's always been a BACKGROUND character at best for the first two movies. Those watching the films without reading the comics or watching the shows know NOTHING about her. So why the hell would you switch out a character we've known for years and can relate so well to with one that we've never heard utter a word until now?! And I hear she's set to have a much BIGGER role in Days of Future Past. It had BETTER be good.
Bottom line, it wasn't TERRIBLE, but it should have been SO MUCH better. And fans should thank Odin that Bryan Singer is back in the director's chair for Days of Future Past. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to watch the theatrical debut of will.i.am. May God, or Odin, have mercy on my soul.
Ghostbusters II (1989)
Why Ghostbusters III never got off the ground
After hearing about the unfortunate passing of Mr. Harold Ramis, I decided to take a look back at one of the movies that he was best known for... and then a couple days later, I saw the sequel. No disrespect to the man's writing, but by God was it not on par with the original.
It has its moments, though. Rick Moranis did a decent job reprising his role, the scene with the Statue of Liberty was both visually impressive and a bit of a heart warmer, and as "puppety" as he looked in this film, it was good to see Slimer again.
But when this film was bad, it was PHENOMINALY bad. The soundtrack is kind of to blame, in my opinion. The Sinicized tones sound like a 1980's horror film if anything. Scenes like the slime in the bathtub and the baby being kidnapped work with it since they're trying to give off a scary vibe, but when it tries to attempt something more lighthearted, it doesn't even BEGIN to level it out. The first movie managed to take the climax with the final confrontation of Gozer and still manage to deliver some good laughs. There was nothing in the climax of this film that I could bring myself to chuckle to, mostly because it involved a small infant dangling on the wall between life and death with a satanic looking Shakespeare trying to possess his body. I'm sorry, but WHERE in a scene involving THIS would I be inclined to be humored?
If this was how unfunny a sequel in this franchise was back then, I CRINGE to think what would have happened if 3 lived to see the light of day in THIS generation.
Oh, and the remix of Ray Parker Jr. song was terrible and forced. Just thought I'd make that clear.
R.I.P. Harold Ramis November 12th, 1944 - February 24, 2014
Walking with Dinosaurs 3D (2013)
Land Before Time This Ain't
Remember when Disney's Dinosaur came out? Probably not, but it appeared to try the same familiar formula that Don Bluth's animated classic Land Before Time perfected using "then" state of the art CGI rendering. Needless to say, it didn't meet up to what audiences and critics were hoping to see. Having said that, this film is Citizen Freaking Kane compared to the 2013 abomination that is known simply as Walking with Dinosaurs.
While the effects look like a step up in comparison, the dialogue and characters are about as intelligent as the dinosaurs this film was based on, and even THAT'S being generous.
It preys upon the ignorance of children who honestly could be taught something far better and entertained far more in a much better film. Hell, Jurassic Park is a better film about dinosaurs to show to children than this.