teamyoth's Reviews

Revolver (2005)

2/10

This movie has no meaning, so don't pretend it does.

29 September 2005

Usually I really like Jason Statham films, which was the main driving force behind me watching this. As usual his performance was excellent, even though the script he was given was obviously a load of rubbish. The acting in general was all pretty good, but their hard work was all in vain because the story didn't have any meaning. I understood the film, with constant repetition of the main points it really isn't too challenging for most people to work out what's going to happen at the end, the problem is that there just wasn't a point to it! They didn't establish enough character or motive to make me care about any of them, to be honest I didn't give a rat's arse who died or what.

Some people will claim this film is pure genius, that Richie is challenging the clichés of Hollywood and making a masterfully crafted blend of art-house and gritty action. Well these people are lying and pretending they liked it to seem intelligent. The biggest revealing point is the quote "people don't like having their intelligence challenged," which in my opinion is a psychological trick in itself, making you feel as though you should like it because you'll be branded as ignorant if you don't "understand."

Don't waste your money on this travesty, instead if you're looking to be challenged and want to watch a film that requires real thought, watch Donnie Darko. Now THAT is a masterpiece.

12 out of 25 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink

I Still Know What You Did Last Summer (1998)

1/10

So bad I wanted to gouge my eyes out with a rusty radiator

1 June 2005

Warning: Spoilers

I must say teen slashers used to have some appeal, but this film probably hit the lowest of the Hollywood lows. The only redeeming factor of the entire film was the fact that Jennifer Love Hewitt is in it, giving it some aesthetic appeal at least. But then the story gets under way and it's the most predictable thing EVER. The acting was horrendous, the plot pointless and the gore non-existent. In every one of these dumb slasher flicks there's a scene where the murderer is down for the count and can easily be taken advantage of, but for some reason unknown to man, the "good guys" don't seem to realise this. But "I Still Know what you did last summer" has possibly the worst one I have ever seen. What it lacks in gore it definitely makes up for in logic...oh wait no, they have NONE! Here's the situation, the murderer has fallen through a ceiling or something and he's unconscious. One of the girls has a great big fire axe in her hand. What would most sensible humans do? That's right, swing that axe lots and lots of times, making sure his head and body are separate entities, and why not his limbs as well. BUT NO! She doesn't do anything of the sort, instead she uses the axe to break into a greenhouse and then...THROWS IT AWAY. Clever girl! She may be dead but at least she got the moral high-ground.

N.B. If you're ever stuck in a slasher situation, KILL the murderer when you get chance, and use a bit of logic. Then again if that happened the film would last about 15 minutes, which would definitely have been a good thing.

31 out of 55 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink

House of Wax (2005)

4/10

Disappointment

1 June 2005

Normally I'm the type that shys away from these trendy teen horrors, but I still watched it because a) it was free and b) the sinfully sexy Elisha Cuthbert is in it. The trailer was in fact quite impressive, and had got my hopes up that maybe a GOOD teen slasher would be waiting for me. The film started off as one might expect, introducing the characters and setting up the "mishap." Once the killing starts though, you know the film's gone badly wrong. Apparently bones and tendons in this film have the equivalent strength of noodles and severing body parts is as easy as melting butter with a blast furnace. Oh and apparently car windows these days are made of paper. Having said that, the deaths are entertaining and gory enough to keep it interesting and some parts were done brilliantly, the waxing in particular. In conclusion, totally unrealistic (as is expected of Hollywood slashers) and predictable (ditto), however almost saved by some nice touches.

0 out of 0 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink

teamyoth

Reviews

Tell Your Friends

Recently Viewed