Reviews

A movie devoid of any cogent plot. It's like so high school art project than a serious film. I kept watching just hoping something, anything would happen. Alas, it was not to be. There is no rational reason for the one woman is so desperate for acceptance. Nothing about cold and distant parents. Or why a biker gang wants to killer the antagonist. Or why the woman wants to burn down the gas station. And why is the cop so clueless that he can't smell gasoline. Well that's about it for me. Either I missed a lot or this movie is a ginormous waste of film and time. Josh Hutcherson didn't do himself any favors being in this dreck.

I was expecting a movie about the rigors of life at sea. Instead it's a mishmash of bungling and inept criminals with some family drama thrown in. They lose their boat in a storm so they use the father's boat and lose it by illegally fishing in Canadian waters. Of course they get caught and lose the father's boat. In a misguided attempt to get the father's boat out of impound, they smuggle heroin for the local mob boss. Of course, they lose that too. The acting is mediocre to dreadful. It's just not worth the time. Tommy Lee Jones is the only light in the darkness. He adds a reality to his character; beaten by life, disappointed in his son, and is dying from cancer. But in the end he's the one that saves everyone.

Oh where to begin this movie is so full of the technically inaccurate and scientific impossible. So we'll start with the opening scenes where Watney performs surgery on himself. He injects several times a topical anesthetic which would do nothing to stop or even dampen the deep pain from removing the fragment in his abdomen. Even using Lamaze breathing wouldn't help. Then he would have to close the wound with sutures not staples. So Watney would probably bleed out or get an infection that would kill him. But that would be the end of movie so I'll let him survive.

The roaring wind storm is scientifically inaccurate as the Martian atmosphere is very thin and you need atmosphere to generate wind. So the roaring storm would really be like a light breeze. And speaking of storms notice how nice the weather is for the rest of the movie? These sand storms can block out the Sun for days or weeks and without sunlight (weak as it is) Watney would not be able to use the solar panels. No solar panels means no power means no heat or oxygen or lights in the habitat. So Watney would either freeze to death or die of CO2 poisoning. So again end of the movie. I could go on and on so I'll skip to the end that's just laughable. When Watney is told the crew can't reach him, he goes Ironman by puncturing his glove with a Leatherman tool and "flies" to the Hermes. Except this ignores the fact there is ZERO air pressure in space so the second he pops his glove ALL the air will blowout through the hole no matter how fast or how hard he closes that hand. It's called explosive decompression and Mark Watney dies. Any way you cut this HE DIES.

Why do I off on this movie? Because it makes the generally uneducated public think a person can survive on Mars by growing potatoes. And you can't. Even with a crew of ten or more there would be low chance of survival beyond a few weeks or months and that's provided nothing mission critical breaks.

As far as the acting, it's passable. No Oscar noms here. The pace is good and the dialogue isn't nauseating mostly. It's just chewing gum for the eyes (credit to Frank Lloyd Wright).

What a hokey storyline. A human that is "augmented" to fight a terminator that is vastly superior in every way. And having an aging Annie reprise his role over and over is so trite. Thomas is a bit actor who is completely out of her depth in a lead. The dialog socks. And Hamilton should have just stayed home. All the potty mouth was NOT necessary. This morass should have gone directly to DVD. Or the trash.