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Stormchaser86
Reviews
Becky (2020)
It left me as furious as the lead character
*Spoiler alert*. This film had such promise from the blurb. I was expecting something along the lines of The Last House on the Left. But it's a far far far far cry from that.
It's first big mistake is getting the viewer all riled up about the invasion of a step family. Only to then a short while later, eliminate the lead character's sole remaining good parent. And then, just to rub salt into a huge open wound, repeatedly fail to deal with the aforementioned step family invasion. Meanwhile a series of wooden acting performances stumble around in a very messy, disjointed story; failing to deliver anything that even remotely passes for thriller or horror.
A self-defence type film like this should have me on the very edge of my seat; cheering on every takedown of each bad guy as it went. Instead I was left not only shouting at the tv in frustration, but also rooting for the other team and hoping that one of the bad guys would turn things around. But alas it wasn't to be - the bad guys were somehow all eliminated in a painful series of dreadful amateur dramatics. Meanwhile the invading stepfamily were allowed to swan off into the sunset and then, after what felt like 9hrs, the film ended as weakly as it began; with an interview between authorities and the lead character, that felt like it had been thrown in as an afterthought.
In short - the creator of this film came up with a great idea, then didn't have the guts to see it through.
Feel free to give it a go, just be ready to scream, but maybe not the type of scream you were expecting.
The Rig (2023)
Deepwater Horizon meets Alien
Part disaster thriller, part sci-fi, this tense drama series will have you on the edge of your seat from start to finish. The setting is a work of genius and gives you a real sense of isolation and impending peril.
Packed with gripping action, impressive special effects and a rollercoaster storyline, the clash of genres blends seamlessley in a superbly written storyline that will keep you guessing to the end and beyond.
I binge watched it over 2 nights and it left me eager for more of the same. At the time of writing this review (24/3/23) a second season has been confirmed and I for one cannot wait to see what will happen next...
Blade Runner 2049 (2017)
Blade Rambler
Extremely slow paced, far too light on action and packed with random, disjointed scenes that bear little meaning to a wafer thin plot.
I was expecting something along the lines of iRobot but it doesn't even come close to that. The main character hardly says a word throughout the entire film and spends most of his time wandering around aimlessly.
An hour in and I was wondering why Harrison Ford was listed as a headline act, but stick with it because he does eventually appear, albeit very much in a supporting role.
The only positive I can take from this feature is some more than decent special effects which do a good job of portraying a distopian future Los Angeles.
Unfortunately though all that work is wasted on a film that goes nowhere fast. There are a few muted action sequences but, like hard rain falling on bone dry ground, they punctuate such a long drought in picking up the pace, that their effect is limited at best.
I wouldn't go as far to say this is one to avoid, but certainly don't watch if you're feeling a bit tired as you will struggle to stay awake.
Sanitation Day (2020)
Utter rubbish
It's very rare that I give up on a film - I'm a 'Netflix junkie' and have watched hundreds and hundreds of movies over the past few years. I'm generally quite tolerant of dodgy special effects or bad acting or a plot so thin it becomes meaningless. I could probably count on my fingers the number of films I have abandoned, but sometimes you just have to draw the line and I couldn't finish this, gave up after 30mins. Don't waste your time.
Uncut Gems (2019)
Star Trek Mafia 0: A Jeweller Lost in New York
Yes my review title is utter random gibberish. But if you can devote to (and survive) the 2 1/4 hrs of screentime taken up by this movie, it will soon become clear, or maybe not.
I had very high expectations for this picture, I'm a fan of Adam Sandler and I really enjoy a lot of his films, my favourite probably being Anger Management. And the write up suggested a polished crime caper - perhaps a cross between Oceans 11 and The Italian Job I thought. But I couldn't have been more wrong. From it's blurry, noisy outset to its woefully underwhelming conclusion Uncut Gems is a total mess of a film.
Nothing works in this movie. In just about every scene there are several people all talking over each other. It's so disjointed that it's virtually impossible to keep hold of an extremely poorly implemented plot. There are no likeable characters, no backstory to any of the lead roles' journeys and no chemistry between anybody.
It's like the creators just sent the cast into a series of rooms filled with hidden cameras, told them to talk among themselves for a bit, but then instead of directing them, they just left them there and went right to lunch.
And riding on top of all of that is an almost continous music score which sounds like the backing track to an ultra-low budget sci-fi movie from the 80s. It's absolutely awful, quite possibly in fact the worst choice of soundtrack I've heard from a film. It doesn't gel at all with what's happening on screen and because most of the time the characters are just shouting gibberish over each other, makes for an extremely unenjoyable experience.
If like me this film has left you stressed and confused, put on Anger Management featuring the legendary Jack Nicholson, he'll provide you with all the therapy you need, and before you know it the scars from those uncut gems will be returned to the murky underground world in which they belong.