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Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023)
Weakest of the trilogy, still very much worth watching
The scene where Rocket finds out he's a raccoon is 10/10 material, a lot of the jokes are 9/10 material as are the characters, the story is 8/10 material, and some minor issues bring it down to a total of 8/10.
For example,
1. Why does the bad guy have to have this ludicrous gravity ability? He literally is the most powerful man that can possibly exist pretty much.
2. How do so many aliens and people and things work for the bad guy that he was able to make such a colossally enormous quantity of ludicrous animal experiments? How did he convince them? I mean, what was the job description? "Work for us to create a better world by torturing animals in the quest to create superior beings"? How did that attract all those employees?
3. How did he create an entire planet that looked exactly like Earth? Earth is pretty huge. Not to mention the vast range of plant life and ocean life which he seemed to perfect.
4. How was he contempt with this alternate Earth and it's ridiculous inhabitants for so long? Didn't he realise that his stupid half-random-animal half-person things were not superior to anything?
5. Why is it that so many characters in this film get whacked by a spaceship or other random object moving at an incredible speed and bashed/squashed into a hard surface only to be perfectly fine? Just reduce the impact and make it a bit more believable.
6. Some parts were drawn out a bit, such as Starlord being drunk (which felt really random by the end), Starlord's face blowing up in space, and some other stuff towards the beginning.
7. How am I supposed to accept that Starlord is basically willing to face an almost certain death situation just to retrieve a bunch of songs that he could compile in a playlist in 10 minutes back on Earth? That scene was a good idea, just not executed in a very appealing way, particularly for the likes of Quill's integrity or intelligence.
8. What is all this stuff about the "forever sky"? We get it, Rocket had friends who wanted to do stuff with him, enough with talking about the sky lasting forever.
All minor problems I suppose. The general story was strong and the characters were almost all really good. So still an 8/10.
Side note: bad guy says he visited Earth "once"? Surely the understatement of all time if you're able to make a near exact replica of the entire planet...
Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023)
"It doesn't make sense" - Scott Lang
You're damn right Scott!
Can someone please explain to me where Kang comes from, why he has all these powers, why he calls himself Kang, why he was banished, how he has an army, why he has followers, why he creates poverty, how he creates poverty, how he destroys worlds, and what he ultimately wants other than revenge for his variants who banished him? At least the actor (Jonathan Majors) was very good, as we know from season 1 of Loki, which is superior to this.
You know who's acting sucked though? Whoever played Cassie Lang. How useless can you get?? Also, how does she manage to get imprisoned so much, how did she make that ridiculous machine with minimal help, how old is she (because by my maths she's about 14), and why does she refer to Hank as her grandfather? She made the movie a LOT worse, and so did Hope, who, unlike in the two previous films, was just one dimensional, lame, pointless, boring, and annoying.
Positives:
- Paul Rudd. He once again delivered an entertaining performance, and paired with some of the best dialogue in the film, his character was very good. If it wasn't, the movie would probably be terrible.
- Hank Pym: good performance and reliable character.
- The mind reader dude: entertaining character performed excellently.
- The ant army UNTIL they decided to let Kang go and disappear for the rest of the movie.
Overall, a fair few entertaining moments/characters and points of potential, but riddled with a story that hardly made any sense and a couple of terrible characters.
Wog Boys Forever (2022)
Probably the weakest of the trilogy
It definitely had some strong moments and good themes, but it's like this was the first draft of the script or something, and the good moments were not utilised to their maximum potential. The director used way too many shots that were half way between a close up and a medium close up. As Rowan Atkinson said, for comedy, you need to show things from a wide angle so that we can see all the actions from all the characters.
Sooshi Mango were clearly thrilled to be able to use some of their best gags in a feature film, and they were mostly very good. Nick Giannopoulos's acting was actually superb, and works so well with this style of humour.
Overall, strong moments and a few weak ones, but it did not reach its potential due to a lack of polishing and not great directing.
The Book of Boba Fett: Chapter 2: The Tribes of Tatooine (2022)
I was entertained by its dumbness
Lots of random tribal elements that are designed for people who can't understand the complexities of a plot that has talking, or a plot at all for that matter.
Overall, a brainless episode with almost no story and unexplained randomness.
Formula 1: Drive to Survive: Tipping Point (2022)
For those who say it's biased...
All the episode did was show every individual's perspective on everything. The episode itself had no biased towards anything, unless you count Horner and Wolff's opinions having an equal amount of screen time as "biased" towards Hamilton.
The only drawbacks of the episode was Buxton (as usual) saying either completely evident information or a random opinion of his own (which took away from the rest of the episode's unbiased-ness), and the fact that it failed to mention Verstappen's off-track overtake of Hamilton in Silverstone well before the incident, a manoeuvre Buxton previously stated was illegal, but conveniently forgot to mention here.
George Harrison: My Sweet Lord (2021)
Might as well listen to the song.
You know a music video isn't that good when the only reason to watch it is the song. That and random celebrity cameos which were decent, especially Ringo Starr's.
Formula 1: 2021 Italian Grand Prix (2021)
Literally perfect.
Ricciardo win and excellent drive, Verstappen crashed into Hamilton and then blames him even though he nearly killed him, McLaren 1-2, McLaren shoeys.... Fantastic!!
Cruella (2021)
Better than expected
101 Dalmations is a fantastic film with excellent characters, and after watching it one would think that it cannot be depicted in live action. The live action remakes proved this correct, however Cruella is different.
The angle taken on the film actually provides a sufficient and imaginative backstory for Cruella DeVil, and it cleverly manages to position the audiences on the side of the character despite how much we hate her in all her other depictions. That was quite impressive, as well as the acting from Emma Thompson.
The story was good, except there appeared to be repetition of segments of the movie which just make you feel like the movie is more of the way through than it actually is. Another thing that did this was the constant climactic moments which end up tiring you out a little. This means that when the proper climax happens, the movie feels like it's been going on forever and you find yourself not really as engaged as you should be.
Emma Stone's accent was really impressive, however it must have been the director's decision to make it more posh in certain moments, which I wasn't really a fan of. Also, the incorporation of a full fledged lgbt character felt a little unsuitable for the time period in which it was set (sorry about the spoiler).
The soundtrack was filled with excellent songs which were really suitable for the film. However, the events happening on screen couldn't quite match the coolness of the song resulting in the music being a slight distraction.
Overall a very admirable and imaginative effort from Disney.
Wellington Paranormal (2018)
Unbelievable
It can't be overstated how superb this show is. Original, hilarious, unique, and clever. Every second of it is brilliant and it serves as the perfect spinoff to 'What We Do In The Shadows'. Highly recommended.
Tenet (2020)
Intentionally difficult to understand
The concept of this movie is brilliant, but unfortunately Christopher Nolan ruined his own idea. He added heaps of silly details and then covered up the fact that they either don't make any sense or the explanation is stupid.
He did this with multiple techniques:
1. Cutting out parts which are crucial to the plot but would be impossible to explain
2. Making the dialogue extremely quiet and complicated
3. Not showing some actors the full script or making sure they didn't understand the plot to ensure they didn't know how to deliver the lines
4. Filling the movie with excruciating sounds which block out all critical dialogue and distract viewers from the actual movie
These are the main things he did to make people not understand the details of Tenet. Please don't watch this and think "Well I need to watch this again and understand it better" or "I'm just not smart enough to get it", because the details you don't understand are intentionally made to be uninterpretable, and if you dig to the bottom of them, it'll be disappointing.
The Very Excellent Mr. Dundee (2020)
The Very Excellent Mr. Dundee
Well, the idea was excellent, the story was excellent, a lot of the jokes were excellent, and the performances of the celebrity cast members were excellent.
However, the mood of the movie, the acting from the non-celebrity cast members, and the strange editing and shots were particularly un-excellent. As far as I can tell, this was as a result of the poor directing of the movie.
So was it an excellent movie? No. But it certainly had the potential to be one. In fact I'm quite disappointed that the great plot and jokes and dialogue was ruined by the director.
Sen to Chihiro no kamikakushi (2001)
What the heck did I just see...
It's a struggle to really find the effective words to describe what my eyes just witnessed... I'm honestly still recovering. The only thing I can really say is that 8.6 out of 10 seems slightly high.
This is the first Hayao Miyazaki film that I have seen as you can probably tell. It seemed to be a fictional journey through one's imagination. The only thing I can accurately analyse or rate is the soundtrack, which was very good.
Killer Bean Forever (2008)
The very core of all unbelievableness
Forget John Wick, this is where it's at! I am unaware of the words that are suitable to describe this complete work of art. All I can really say is that 6.5 is not the rating it deserves under any means. Especially since almost every review is a ten! For anyone that doesn't like the geniusness that is this film, maybe you should watch a stupid predictable romantic piece of boloney.
Jaws (1975)
It's a movie about a shark
How can a movie about a big shark be rated 8/10??
People have always told me that this one is different and the shark is not in it for most of the movie but that only makes all the scenes without the shark really boring and slow. Worse still, every aspect of the movie was totally predictable!
This may be because I have seen so many movies that copy this that I just know what's coming. After all, this was the original. That's why I give it a 5/10 rather than a 2 or 3. Also the score was excellent.
Star Wars: Episode IX - The Rise of Skywalker (2019)
First movie I've walked out on since I was 5
No English words can describe the stupidity of the mess I just spent money to see.
From the cheesy dialogue, to the awful acting, to the ridiculous and predictable story, this movie could not have possibly been worse.
There were so many plot holes and unexplained nonsense that I give this monstrosity a 1/10.
Worst 2 and a half hours of film ever.
Joker (2019)
Dark, serious, tense... and bad!
Somehow the darkest and most serious movies get the highest ratings. People say that this movie is so thrilling and that Joaquin Phoenix deserves an Oscar but at the end of the day, it wasn't entertainment. There were so many evil moments and dark scenes but what's so good about that?
This movie was almost like instructions on how to be a psycho. They flipped the usual idea and boundaries of good and evil for the audience to feel sorry for the bad guy. People seem to think this is a good thing. It's bad!
The point of a movie is to entertain audiences and this movie just made me feel depressed and miserable. I'll have to watch a movie where the hero is clear and the villain is clear so I can actually be entertained. The fundemental and successful formula for a film.