Reviews

Don't get me wrong, all the props to the men for the role they actually played in the real life event. I would never take anything away from that. But this movie was a long, boring look at three school buddies, with only a passing nod to the actual event (the 'action' of which took about 15 seconds).

The first act is mostly their early life, where they accomplished, which shows them to be below-average children that may or may not have ADHD (this diagnosis was quickly dismissed by both mothers (one using religion and another by attacking the teacher. This diagnosis actually continues to make sense as you look further into their history, but I'm not a psychiatrist, just someone who actually -has- ADHD diagnosed later in life.)

The second act is the vacation trip that the three men take across Western Europe, starting I believe in Italy. The men don't speak the language and don't really understand the culture, looking for what single American young men look for in the modern age: Instagram shots, pretty women and beer. Again, the movie seems to take pride in showing that the 'heroes' are average or less.

The final act is the takedown of the lone gunman, who is portrayed as a one-dimensional figure with no past, no future, no name and very poor skills. He has an AK and a backpack (which we found out later was full of ammunition). He strips off his shirt (rationale totally ignored?) and comes out of the washroom, where the gun is immediately grabbed by the person just outside (this is itself pretty heroic, but again, ignored by Eastwood.) In fact, if this part of the film is accurate there's two American heroes (but only one of them was a main in the story), the person who grabbed the gun immediately (and got shot for his troubles) and the person who ran at the shooter (Incidentally, he would have been immediately gunned down if the weapon hadn't misfired). The other two hid back in their seats until the fight was well joined. Nobody was an expert, and the fight itself was poorly done by all involved.

Overall, this film seemed to be a clap for all those lonely sub-par men who never do much of anything in their life. It could have been so differently and so much better, if it absolutely be done at all. I'm guessing the movie was only made as a personal 'hurrah' to the fading-but-stellar career of Clint Eastwood.

I have restarted this review about five times now, because it usually devolves into a rant about Hollywood and the crap they feed us now. I'll try to avoid that..mostly. :) Just the basics.

This show is a tired repeat of many of the shows out there right now, just with cosmetic changes. (black skin instead of white, Harlem instead of Metropolis, etc.) The same slow, naïve handsome man who believes that everything will be OK, regardless of how deep the @#$^ is, usually his own fault.

And when I say slow, I mean that many ways. He is always behind the ball mentally, trying to catch up (and never succeeding.) And he also is just plain slow, likening him not to a speeding bullet but a leisurely cement truck.

And a bullet magnet! Bullets can't seem to miss him, but that's rather a good thing, as he isn't very careful about how he carries anyone in his hands at the time. (You can see the people he's 'protecting' clearly, even when someone is shooting a machine gun at him)

All in all, if you are bored it is mindless entertainment. If you want anything more, you will be woefully disappointed.

After having now (on a thoroughly bored and sick week) watching this both as a movie and as a TV series, I have to conclude that this must have been just a terrible series of books. And after having 4 (now grown) children I have watched some pretty bad ones. Some over - and over - and over.

This series seems to assume that your last cell of intelligence just turned and ran out of your ears (either before or) after seeing the pilot. Nancy Drew would have given them a thorough drubbing, and I read her when I was 7. The acting was terrible, the sets were disastrous and the plot ...was there a plot? The main characters just seemed to race from scene to scene without anything seeming to resemble a plan.

I don't know what age bracket this is supposed to target. Everyone has tattoos (that take no time and just barely hurt) that the mundanes can't see - and they do talk about sex in a scene or two so I guess this is meant for the brain-dead teen in everyone's back yard. *sigh* Yes, anything at all can be turned into a no-budget TV series nowadays, and here is your proof. Instead, why don't you go watch the dryer on spin cycle? It will be much more entertaining.

On one hand, this is actually quite an engaging sitcom, about a doctor (not a surgeon as was reported in the primary review, but an ER doctor, but who cares?) who is to medicine what MacGyver was to ...everything else in the 1980s. (The joke was MacGyver could make a nuclear weapon out of chewing gum (with the foil wrapper! The wrapper was always important.) and a pineapple. Well, Hank is the same for medicine, coming up with incredible (and incredibly silly) miracle cures to the most bizarre medical maladies to ever roll of the tongue in Latin.

On a more serious note, Hank is sometimes a pill-pushing drug mule (he regularly gives of a litany of medicines that will somehow cure these incurable conditions. Amazingly, some of the names of these medications come up again and again. For example, listen for Prednisone (actually a synthetic steroid used for allergies, rheumatic conditions and leukaemia) which he uses for a great many things other than those. He directs all of his patients into as many costly, unnecessary procedures as possible (I think every single patient Hank has ever had has needed a C-T (a much more expensive type of X-Ray), an MRI or both (because he has his own portable MRI. They are only $25-40,000 per MONTH). He alternates on different seasons as being an altruistic medicine man and a money-grubbing shyster (which begs the question: As I can't imagine his practice would do anything less than make money hand over fist (concierge doctoring to the ultra riche), how does he keep being on the verge of broke? Perhaps he needs to sell that portable MRI machine? Anyway, after Season 5 he gives in to the corporate overlords (But only the nicest of overlords? Because we know that US hospitals and HMOs really only have the best interests of their patients at heart. (Sorry. Sarcasm got away from me there :) Anyway, I haven't finished Season 5 yet, because it left me with a bad taste in my mouth. Maybe they don't go through with it, because I would think that as soon as it becomes a corporation, then all the joy of the series would bleed out of it.

One final note about cast: Hank is enjoyable, Divya is incredible, Evan is ...miscast? and Jill is missed (Hank seems to lose part of his character without her around? *sigh* Maybe he finds another love later? Wait, don't tell me!)

The Good: This show started out really well, from my standpoint. A little bit corny, a bit campy, but it didn't shy away from it. In fact, it embraced the fact that the dad Rogelio is a telenovela star. I loved the fact that it mixes with the unique blend that is Florida...a bit English, a bit Mexican, and a bit Cuban. The romance is in the air, and the language flows naturally between English and Spanish, with subtitles that allow you to carry the conversation. (I also love that every once in a while they DON'T provide the subtitles where it isn't essential. It makes me want to learn Spanish, and I don't live anywhere close to the Mexican border!) The plot follows the growing relationship between Rafael and Jane, and I wanted them to find their way together!

The Bad: About Ep. 16, I started to get a bad taste in my mouth. Jane suddenly can't keep away from Michael, (who is suddenly a good guy again) Rafael starts to close up and act like an idiot for no apparent reason, and I started to curl my nose up as I saw where it was going. Rather than stay original, the show is becoming yet another generic love triangle. And here I had such high hopes for original entertainment for the show, for the growth between Jane and Rafael and how they were going to try and manage the pitfalls of real life. But the way it is going right now, it's just another generic telenovela (soap opera). Anyone know anything else new, original and a bit romantic? I think I'm going to need to find a new show to watch. :P

...and you never were much of an actor in the first place.

This movie features a much older, chubbier Steven Segal hashing out the same basic threadbare plot lines he has become known for, with no facial animation and (NEW) no real action (but there is some really quick camera-shot gimmicks?) Come to think of it, he doesn't really move quickly at ANY point in this movie. (In the outtakes I would expect to see many shots of Segal zipping around, climbing in and out of in those little lot buggies?) The amazing thing is how they somehow were able to burn through a $10,000,000 budget. What did they spend it on? Even Segal drives around in a '80s era truck, and most of the other vehicles were little better. One modification my boyfriend would like that was on that truck: that windshield that can stop multiple bullets?

Anyway, disappointing all round.

First, let me say I've never been a Woody Allen fan. I find his movies wooden and boring.

But this movie was the exception, not the rule! Plenty of turns kept my interest. The plot was intriguing. The dialogue was interesting. Even the subtitled portions (sorry folks, I speak English and French, not Spanish) added to the film.

Why, then would I rate this title so low? The ending. Wow, the ending was terrible. Ruined the whole movie, and made the watching of it two hours of stupidity that solved nothing.

** SPOILERS AHEAD ** The ending made the whole movie useless. In the end, not only are the main characters in worse shape than they started...they now KNOW their lives are meaningless and terrible. Vicky is now in an unhappy marriage. Christina is single again, and knows exactly what she missed.

THIS is why I dislike Woody Allen movies. Because they aren't happy unless you feel terrible at the end.

As in 'Shockingly Awful'.

This movie was predictable, trite, and just plain not enjoyable.

Anyone that has seen 'Psycho' has seen a much better movie than this ever could be, on the same premise.

Luke Wilson's character is an idiot, though every horror movie needs one, and most get killed at the beginning. Luke's character was supposed to be dead, and then when I found out he wasn't I was disappointed.

If I had been in this position, I would have solved the dilemma in about three minutes, but of course that wouldn't make a good movie and I'm ex-Army. No, not saying I would have killed everyone or anyone, I just found it a very thin premise that they couldn't escape.

Without beating a tired horse to death, this was NOT a good movie. Not even a half-decent horror flick. I got up and made nachos half-way through, and didn't even bother to pause the movie.

This movie is crap. There's no nicer way to put it.

The main character is a totally dis-likable character. He's supposedly just turned 18...though by his 5-o'clock shadow, he clearly is not. Not to mention he's a chicken that repeatedly fails to live up to his friends, his family...and everyone else.

The movie starts with the revelation that he's already destroyed his mother's life. Then he goes to work on his father's. The whole point of this movie is apparently about racing...regardless of your friends, the property damage, or....anything else.

Lets not forget the race at the end, where the movie producers decided that 'American muscle' would beat out Japanese supercars. Not only is it nauseating pampering to US viewers, its totally untrue...except in a movie. Japanese cars corner like these corner like they are on rails. Its all they were built for. On the other hand, American cars like the old Mustang shown corner like...tanks. Don't get me wrong, on a flat stretch they are hard to beat. But in a drifting battle...? I love the old Mustangs...but a corner machine, it isn't.

All I can say is...if this were my child, I'd ship him back home. Maybe some time in jeuvie is a good cure for stupidity.

This movie tries very hard to be suspenseful, dramatic, and/or mysterious. But it tries too hard, and ends up being none of those things.

The actors are not good. I had higher impressions of Josh Harnett than this...definitely not his best work.

The plot is see-through and predictable. Every step of the way, you see a 'dramatic' element that is entirely, blindingly obvious.

The direction is not good. In fact, at times the movie falls over itself, with accidental exposures that seem out of sequence. At one point, we see Josh's character driving around in a car. Several scenes later, he asks to borrow the car from his friend, and his friend gives him the keys...to the same car...how did he get it the first time?

Again in the blindingly obvious, still using the car sequence, the friend tells him that he can borrow the car, if he has it back by 6pm. You KNOW he won't have the car back on time...and he doesn't. Wow, a surprise that isn't, because we already know Matthew is unreliable. It would have been more surprising (and perhaps make us like the character better) if he had made the effort to get the car back on time.

It is easy to predict when you meet the second 'Lisa' that she's a psycho. Of course, Matthew ends up falling for Alex's (the fake Lisa's) machinations, and even ends up sleeping with her. Of course, he is in love with one girl, engaged to another, so we like him even less. Sadly, by that point you dislike both characters, so you don't really care what happens to them. Alex is stringing along Matt's friend...but he's a pathetic loser, so you don't care about him either.

We find out just how psychotic Alex is...through a thoroughly unbelievable set of circumstances, she keeps the two love interests apart.

And thus, the entire movie drags on. Right to the scripted end where the main 'love interests' keep missing each other (using more coincidences), just to meet at the very end and fall in love again, in true movie fashion.

I did like this movie...up until the last half hour or so.

Call me a sap, but I like movies with happy endings. I want Will to end up with Elizabeth. Will is a 'nice guy' and through the first film and the first part of the second, Elizabeth stands by her man. The ending, however, indicates that she basically now has the hots for Capt Jack, who has revealed himself so far to be a thoroughly despicable character. Sure, at the very end he does make one valiant sacrifice to head back to the ship...but in the end this does nothing for the ending. In fact, it is very atypical of him, and rather hard to believe. Will, being the nice guy and true friend (although Jack has backstabbed him repeatedly), agrees to go after Jack even knowing that Elizabeth has a thing for him, having seen them together.

Who knows...perhaps they will wrap it up in the third, and this will just be a mediocre chapter in the middle (think Matrix 2). I'm not the writer or the director, but part of me hopes so.