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3/10
Baffling Movie in Which Every Scene Feels Like an Acting Exercise
17 February 2024
I may have been too generous giving this three stars. Absurd premise, poorly directed. I think the actors are doing the best they can with terrible material, but let's just say you can really see how hard they are working, and that is in no way a compliment. When I say that every exchange seems like an acting exercise, I mean that scene partners have no chemistry, and they all seem to be struggling to find their motivation, which makes sense, because nothing in any scene follows from anything that came before it. There is no narrative. It's just a bunch of things that definitely didn't happen because they make no sense and have no internal consistency or reason.
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Maybe I Do (2023)
5/10
Movies like this have *nothing* but dialogue. The dialogue should be crisp.
3 July 2023
I had to put on subtitles for this. For a talky romantic comedy with no explosions. Christopher Nolan this is not.

Directors: pay attention to audio. At this point, we're nearly back to silent film with how badly y'all handle this stuff. Movie watchers all watched the explainer about why movie audio is so bad these days. Did movie directors? You should. I don't care if your actors want to sound more "naturalistic" with their mumbles and their whispers. They have a job to do and they are not doing it if I can't hear the words coming out of their mouths.

Apparently my review is too short until now.
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Mr. Right (I) (2015)
7/10
I started out unimpressed, but ended up really liking it.
25 August 2019
My reservations at the beginning of this movie were simply that, in the early romantic comedy scenes, Rockwell (whom I love) is simply too old for Anna Kendrick. The actors are 16 years apart, but Kendrick looks young for her age and Rockwell looks old* for his age, magnifying the effect.

But, as the film descends into utter madness, you realize that these two super hero/super villain/ psychos are perfect for each other, and with interests so...unusual...they would never find anyone else, so bless 'em.

Watch this if, against your better judgment, you're always a little sad that Veronica & JD don't end up together at the end of Heathers. Oh, and RZA is an under-appreciated acting talent.

*But he's a great little dancer.
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1/10
A family of sociopaths sets out to torture a woman with social anxiety.
19 September 2015
Warning: Spoilers
In this movie, Dermot Mulroney brings his girlfriend home to be humiliated by his family. The family is unfathomably cruel to her for no apparent reason. Dermot Mulroney does not defend her, and in fact seems to quite obviously hate her. Their relationship appears to be some sort of vicious joke at her expense, as he seems openly contemptuous of her. (Then again, Dermot Mulroney always appears to be openly contemptuous of his romantic leads.) She calls her sister for moral support, and the sister of course takes the side of the horrible family and falls in love with Dermot Mulroney. There is a point when the family has driven her from the house in tears, and they hear her crash a car into a tree, not once, but twice. They continue eating, rather than check to see if their guest has died on their lawn (except for Luke Wilson, the only member of the family to show a modicum of human decency to the character, because wants to sleep with her). This film seems less like a movie and more like a very upsetting stress dream. Happily, Dermot Mulroney's awful mother dies. Sadly, everyone else lives.
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