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Reviews
Argo (2012)
Not as good as the list of awards would have you believe.
Okay movie, but I didn't get a thrill... Ben Affleck and George Clooney apparently put up the money for this, Ben put on a disguise beard and fixed facial expression to fill in for Brad Pitt who (luckily for him) pulled out of this movie. There was plenty of tension but I found the characters rather flat. The look of a 1980's thriller might have been deliberate but it went too far and the movie would have been better if the character development was of a more modern standard. Ben reminded me of one of those 'martial artist-turned actor' types like Chuck Norris or Steven Seagal with his odd appearance and wooden manner, but I was still going along okay with the movie until the last 10 minutes (Spoilers follow!) from where the guards struggle to get in touch with the control tower, (presumably they could have just phoned the air traffic controllers,) then a bunch of police cars chase the jet at a highly unlikely 150+ mph with not a peep from air traffic control or a single problem with jetwash in one of the most agonisingly contrived 'suspenseful endings' of all time. That was irritating enough but then we spend the next ten minutes watching clumsy bandaid resolution of the misrepresentation of the Canadians' contribution. For a movie apparently 'based on a true story' it looked rather implausible at this point and wanted us to suspend disbelief which is fine if you are watching Chitty Chitty Bang Bang but not when a movie purports to be 'based on true events'. I guess you could state that Chitty Chitty was based on true events, I am sure someone who invented a sweet also restored a car, but the term 'true events' carries a great deal more responsibility. All in all a decent movie but not worth more than 6 out of 10 in my mind.
Terra Nova (2011)
Spielberg's style....
I am liking the appearance of Terra Nova but hating Spielberg's style again...
He has a well-earned reputation for some of his previous work but there are certain things about him that are very disappointing and these are painfully obvious in Terra Nova.
Clichés: He loves clichés (apparently, as he uses so many), many viewers don't.
Cardboard characters: Why are his characters so flat in some of his movies? Music overload: Each movie, good or bad, has the same kind of 'horns and strings' symphonic soundtrack. I get the feeling that it is considered part of the formula, but that is really not necessary, most of his films are capable of standing alone as good films without resorting to the 'Spielberg formula'.
Shmaltzy moments: Every Spielberg movie has what my family calls 'Spielberg moments'. They appear about twice in each movie, where all the emotional threads meet in a wonderfully contrived 'knot', that seems all too contrived or overworked or unlikely... remember the dolphins in 'Taken'. The music swells, the lights shine, the amazing coincidence happens, tadaaaaaaa! Wow (puke) what a poignant moment that just got crammed in our face! Like Disney movies for adults.
'Terra Nova' rolls along the old familiar path, ignoring any intellectual or truly interesting threads and plodding along the lowest storyline, leaving an almost interesting but in the end disappointingly hollow experience that could have been so much more...
Consider HG Wells' 'Time Machine' made by Spielberg: The time traveler would probably have been 13 years old, left his girlfriend behind, gone back and met his great-great-great-grandfather, who was a doctor who saved Abraham Lincoln, who turned out to be the girlfriend's great-great-great grandmother's best friend. Then the nasty Morlocks came along and our hero built a weapon based on some stuff he learned in science class and something he saw on 'McGyver' and blasted them all to bits and everyone lived happily ever after and built a small statue that looked uncannily like the Statue of Liberty which they buried until it was dug up by the boy's best friend's grandfather in France who copied it in his design for the well known landmark that stands in New York today (the music swells as a cloud moves away from the moonlight, revealing the modern icon).....
I think Spielberg is over-rated and should not be so formulaic, predictable and patronising. He should put his wonderful abilities to something more ambitious; intellectually, we are not all soft saps who just want bubble gum movies, give us some meat!
Tomorrow, When the War Began (2010)
Where do I get paid to say this movie was good....
Someone is obviously paying people to give positive reviews, I had heard that this was a film I should see... Wrong!
Clumsy, predictable, laughable. They should have had a grown-up check the script before starting production.
Dump trucks are not bullet proof! Soldiers don't run away when a teenager blows up a lawnmower. Soldiers don't go for dinner when someone steals their tanker. Soldiers don't sneak up on enemy 'commandoes' with their gun-lights on.
It kept looking like it could improve and some parts looked very stylish, but then ffffttt! Deflation.
Paper-thin character development, dry lines, ridiculous action sequences and the final scene... OMG lol wtf...I was embarrassed to have told my wife she should watch this with me, she doesn't mind suspending disbelief when watching something like this but she laughed out loud at the final 5 seconds and I cringed!
Sorry to the writer and director, good on you for having the guts to make a movie, no doubt better than I could do, but sheesh, maybe share the workload next time.
Knowing (2009)
What the .... is this about?
It has the makings of a commentary on quantum determinism, but half way through they suddenly thought that this was getting over the heads of the public with money so they decided to dumb it down.
This movie starts off looking interesting but then the best idea they had for an ending was "Then the albino aliens, who are human shaped plasma, take the kids and the easter bunnies to the garden of eden"
Sounds insane? You're right! What were they thinking? If you want to make movies, please aim it at people with half a brain, you might be pleasantly surprised and end up with a good movie AND a profit. If you have a stinker, no amount of candy-coating with special effects and a surprise ending will put a shine on a t**d.
If you think this is a great sci-fi movie, you need to get out more.
King Arthur (2004)
Horrible.....
I gave this 3 stars for nice scenery..... not surprising with all that fertilizer keeping the countryside green! I can suspend disbelief, but not common sense. Lucky that King Arthur is a legend, that might excuse laughable action scenes, wooden characters and the outlandish fantasy.
No-one sweats, people eat legs of mutton like cartoon characters, ice sinks... a smaller group of people weighs more than the original group.....one person can fire 5 arrows that kill 5 different people in one shot. A guy can shoot an arrow into a tree in the far distance and hit a guy in the chest and for some reason, clods of dirt keep flying through the air during swordplay! It is all ridiculous, I could have written better myself.
The characters are so anachronistic I expected someone to pull out a phone and call for backup on the battlefield.
Just because it has a reasonable budget and a-list actors that does not make it watchable or good in any way.
Plan 9 from outer space was more credible and at least we got a laugh! 2 big thumbs down!